A complaint to the GPU by Luna

PigglePuggle

Senior Guinea Pig
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I wish to file a complaint! I have been growing my beautiful bum fur for ages and making it look and smell gorgeous by accessorising with bits of wilted coriander, hay, other piggy's poops, lots of grease gland gunk and wee of course...
And the hooman washed my knickers again while I was wearing them then cut my lovely bum curls off! Took me ages to weave all that good stuff in right up to my bottom and now its gone and there's a right draft up my lovely bum.
I made my complaints very well heard so everyone in the street could hear, and sprayed pee in the hooman's face then cleverly rolled in all the fur bits she cut off and ran round in circles until she breathed in my fur and had to take an antihistamine and use her inhaler.
I will be giving her my best cross pig eye look which with my sarcastic fatty pea eyes is completely withering to the hooman soul and it serves her right.
But my beautiful bottom curls are now all over the hooman's bedroom and face and trousers and it's a bit cold. Please send peaflakes.
Love from Luna x
 
I am wondering if guinea pig hair stylists should form a union or perhaps a trauma support group lol... this friendly old lady who is happy to be picked up and cuddled with no fuss clearly has a "DON'T TOUCH THE HAIR" policy :)
Bum curls are much more integral to her personal space than toenails or ears or face or any part of her with nerves attached! Every slightly trimmed curl was like I was hacking off a limb, then she went full whirling dervish/Tasmanian devil... she has beautiful fur, but... I am extremely allergic to it, and it really smells of wee and bums and last week's dinners lol :)
 
Oh Luna,
I was so sorry that you had to endure the torture of a bum trim.
I ensure that the entire neighbourhood knows I am being treated horribly whenever I get a bum trim.
I feel for you.
Those of us with gorgeous locks that collect wee and poo and anything else lying around the cage should not be deprived of said gorgeous locks.
My heartfelt sympathy from Priscilla
 
I am wondering if guinea pig hair stylists should form a union or perhaps a trauma support group lol... this friendly old lady who is happy to be picked up and cuddled with no fuss clearly has a "DON'T TOUCH THE HAIR" policy :)
Bum curls are much more integral to her personal space than toenails or ears or face or any part of her with nerves attached! Every slightly trimmed curl was like I was hacking off a limb, then she went full whirling dervish/Tasmanian devil... she has beautiful fur, but... I am extremely allergic to it, and it really smells of wee and bums and last week's dinners lol :)
That's weird she was always ok with having her bum trimmed when I had her. I use to put her on a puppy pad on a flat surface and just trim away no problem. I did find using human hairdresser scissors worked best as they don't pull on the fur.
She use to quite like the hairdryer after bath time, she'd sit up washing her face while I dried her back end :love:. Any source of heat and she'd camp out there.
 
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