lifes inponderables...

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mstori

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saw on another forum some of these and it reminded me of an email i got sent.. anyone got any more to add?

this is the email i was sent:


Since the doctor always says to take two aspirins, why don't we just double their size?

If a fly had to wings would it be a walk?

Why, on TV, did "The Incredible Hulk's" shirt always rip but his pants never did?

If Superman could stop bullets with his chest, why did he always duck if the bad guy threw the gun at him?

Why is taking the skin off an animal "dressing", but taking our clothes off "undressing"?

Don't you have to "re-start" before refinishing a table?

Where does all the white go when the snow melts?

What is an occasional table the remainder of the time?

Why do they sell cigarettes at a gas station when you cant smoke there?

When does a large puddle become a pond, and a pond become a lake?

Where is heaven?

Why is it you can walk down a road, even if it goes up hill?

Why are the buttons on mens' shirts on the opposite side to those on ladies' garments?

Why is baseball called the World Series if it is only played in the US?

Why do we say the alarm went off when, in fact, it went on?

If a dwelling catches fire does it burn up or does it burn down?

If everyone lost 5 pounds would it throw the earth of its gravitational pull?

Where does weight go when people lose it?

How do you draw a blank?

If planets are in the sky, are we in the sky too?

Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldn't they be more specific and say "employees of this place only!?

If shampoo comes in so many colours, why is the lather on your head always white?

If Snickers satisfy, why do they make King Size?

When pigeons walk their heads bob up and down really fast, doesn't that give them a bad headache?

Why don't you ever see baby pigeons?

How can there be a competition for solo synchronised swimming?

Why do people say "It's always in the last place you look"? Of course it is always in the last place you look, what kind of moron would keep on looking after he'd found it?

Why is a building called a building when it is already built?

Why is there only one Monopolies and Mergers Commission?

If one of the synchronize swimmers drowns, do they all have to?

Why is a doctors surgery called a practice?

If the No. 2 pencil is so popular, why is it still No. 2?

If you butter a piece of toast and drop it, it lands butter side down.
If you drop a cat it always lands on it's feet.
What would happen if you buttered the back of a cat and dropped that?

If people say it's the best thing since sliced bread, what was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do Kamakasi bombers wear helmets?

Why is there an eject button on the remote when you have to get up to get the video?

Why do you drive in a parkway but park in a driveway?

Do bees get wax in their ears?

Has anyone ever admitted to having an ugly baby?

If the Beatles were so good why did Oasis have to rewrite all their songs?

Why are there no TV adverts for pencils?

Why do priests sing in church when its obvious that they can't sing for England?

Why, on radio shows, do they always talk about the most interesting item at the end of the show?*

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

How does the man who drives the snow plough get to work?

Why is the Welsh language spelled wrongly?

How do you play Chinese scrabble?

What colour hair do bald men put down on their driver's licence?

What happens when curly haired people watch something that curls their hair?

Why do psychics advertise? Don't they know who their customers are and shouldn't they seek them out?

What would happen if night fell and the earth wasn't there to catch it?

The black box flight recorder is painted orange, so why don't they call it an orange box?

When a fly lands on the ceiling, at what point does it turn upside down?

Is it because light travels faster than sound that some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

If it is zero degrees outside today and it is supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow how cold will it be?

Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?

Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

These orange carrots became very popular and were soon the majority of carrots available.

How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?

If man evolved from monkey and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

Before they invented drawing boards what did they go back to?
How is it possible to have a civil war?

If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?

Why is it called the tourist season if you can't shoot them?

If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash why isn't the whole plane made out of the same stuff?

If a plane were made of the same material as a little black box the plane would be too heavy to fly!

Why is it that when you blow in a dogs face he doesn't like it, but when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head out of the window?

If you choke a smurf what colour does it turn?

If a dog's sense of smell is 100 times greater than a human's, why do they have to stick their noses up your butt?
 
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Why don't you ever see baby pigeons?


Because they are turned into soap :p

 
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Your thread has been such a lovely distraction from my essay writing lol! :)
 
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step away from tgpf and get on with your work :)) x
Haha! Very sound advice! If only I was as good at essay writing as I was at procrastinating uni would have been a breeze. I have less than 200 words to go of my last *ever* piece of coursework. Could not be happier right now :)).
 
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I've seen a baby pigeon before. :) My old flat had a veranda, and 2 pigeons nested in a big empty plant pot that I kept on there.

Low and behold, there were 2 small eggs in there after many mornings of mummy and daddy pigeons cooing at the early hours of the morning! X3 1 of them disappeared though...The remaining baby pigeon stayed there till it was old enough to fly away. :D

They're quite huge! Nothing what I expected a baby pigeon to look like!

<3~ xx
 
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mstori

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I've seen a baby pigeon before. :) My old flat had a veranda, and 2 pigeons nested in a big empty plant pot that I kept on there.

Low and behold, there were 2 small eggs in there after many mornings of mummy and daddy pigeons cooing at the early hours of the morning! X3 1 of them disappeared though...The remaining baby pigeon stayed there till it was old enough to fly away. :D

They're quite huge! Nothing what I expected a baby pigeon to look like!

<3~ xx
wow! wonder if i have seen one and not realised then.. Birds scare me when they fly so I probably walk about not taking much notice :)) x
 

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We had a family of pigeons in my standard rose out the back x)
I watched that pigeon grow up......now he/she is with mum and dad but not as often now.
I'm pretty sure that when pigeon's mate they mate for life awwwwwwwwx)

Good thread Tori, had me thinking on a few of them :(|)
 
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