Needing some support

[BlueBird]

Hi there,

Sorry if Ive put this in the wrong place. This seems to be mainly a place of happy threads like sharing pigtures. This is not a thread like that but I thought this was probably the most appropriate place.

So some of you may know I've been through the ringer a bit. My herd hasn't been well recently but this isn't about how to care for them. I've got that covered.

I have a herd of 3: Belle 6, Bonnie 5 and Harvey 3. So they aren't exactly spring chickens anymore. Considering Belle and Bonnie are the age they are. I'm quite proud of myself. It wasn't too long ago that the age expectancy for guineas was 5.

I've had guinea pigs as a child/teenager. It was sad when they died but I coped. Now, having guineas as an adult, if they are ill I'm in bits. I don't know whether that's because I care for them more than I did as a kid or whether it because we see our current pigs more (my childhood guineas lived in our old garage - my current hers is by our kitchen).

I'm not particularly afraid of them dying. My own belief is that although death itself is painful, afterwards is probably a nicer place than here. However, illness in my fur babies I find really stressful and upsetting. Harvey's recent dental problems got me so upset when I discovered it, I was thinking I did not want anymore pigs because their illnesses are so painful for me.

I'm an animal lover. I always have been. At university when I was animaless I would often "window shop" animals to adopt if I was bored or a little blue. I'm sure, if I become animaless after this herd, I'll get like that again.

But as I say, the illnesses I find really painful and difficult to deal with and I wonder whether animal husbandry is good for me. I don't deal with stress very well. My husband has suggested getting a dog instead but I worry that that will be even worse than guinea pigs. Guinea pigs keep you at paw's length cause you're a big scary human. Dogs love you with all their heart. I know that, with dogs at least, it's becoming more acceptable to mourn them/ go to the vets last minute at work. I'm sure that if work saw how upset I was at Harvey's teeth they'd be saying. "Get a grip! It's a guinea pig."

My herd is aging. So I know that illnesses and emergency vets trips are only going to be more frequent. I just wanted to go somewhere for support.

 

[VickiA]

I fully understand how you feel. I have lost so many piggies over the years to one condition or another. And each one breaks my heart. It’s a bit of a black humoured joke in this household that no animal ever dies in its sleep here. I’ve never had the shock of finding one of my piggies passed in their sleep. I’ve always had to be involved in making the decisions about their final trip to the rainbow bridge and helping them there.

Like you, I find their illnesses stressful, (and expensive). But they have given me so much joy over the years that each time I lose one MrA asks whether I can ever envisage a time in my life when we will be guinea pig-less. And I can’t. Because piggies are as much a part of my life as my family are.

I guess what I am saying is I understand how you feel watching them age, and ail. But we are all here to support each other through the bad times as well as the good times. Just think how much joy up they’ve brought to your life, and they to yours.

 

[Bill & Ted]

I share your experience, although I’m 62 so getting on a bit. I had guinea pigs when I was a child/teenager and things seemed very straightforward in those days. There was no fancy x-rays, operations and medications for guinea pigs that were very successful. You could take them to the vets but it was very much down to luck if they survived when they were poorly. Generally they were found in their forever sleep due to the nature of the prey animal and lack of knowledge in general from owners and vets.
Nowadays we are faced with so many decision on treatments but that comes with costs both financially and emotionally and brings with it lots heart searching.
I sometimes feel quite overwhelmed at the amount of love I have for a pet, sometimes far more so than close relatives and friends which sounds really bad and it hurt like hell when they are poorly and when they die.

 

[Deleted member 122615]

Hi there,
I understand where you're coming from, I'm currently having dental problems with my boar, he's nearly 5 and a half and although he doesn't seem to be in pain, thankfully, I continue to catch him struggling with food occasionally, which has been going on for 4 months now and it absolutely breaks my heart everytime. He also had a bladder stone last year which also was a really difficult time. My anxiety goes into overdrive every time he seems off colour or if he hasn't eaten quite as much or drank as much as normal. I haven't had a holiday or even a night away because I just can't leave any of my pets in the care of anyone else. Time and again I say that I will not have any more pets when the current ones have crossed the rainbow bridge. But, the happiness and love they give during our time together means I always will have an animal companion of some sort. All we can do is care for them the best way we can during the time they are here, wether it's a month or 20 years.

 

[Little Ones]

I’m exactly the same. Any illnesses stress me out to the max and I constantly worry about them. When I had my first guinea pig, I didn’t know much about proper care for him so I saw no wrong in how he was cared for. Because of this, I didn’t worry at all about him. Since getting my other pigs just over five years ago, the more I’ve learned about guinea pig care and the illnesses they get, the more worried I have become. For me, I’m unemployed and will struggle to become employed for a lot of my life due to disability, so every illness panics me to no end due to financial strain.
You’re not alone in your feelings, piggy illness is definitely upsetting and stressful as they can go downhill very quickly. They are also extremely expensive pets, more so than cats or dogs! Luckily, they are cute enough and make me happy enough that it’s worth it.

 

[alpacasqueak]

I’ve also never had a piggy (or chinchilla, only one out of 11 rats too!) pass away in their sleep, it’s always been my decision and it does hit you hard
Especially after long illnesses/months and years of treatment like some of my babies. When it’s going on I seriously cannot think of anything else, it’s constant worry really!

My Rupert was sent to the bridge last year at almost age 7, Pedro at 9 in October and three weeks later my Jess (who’s is now nearly 7 and half) went through her eye removal surgery, I spent all day expecting the call it hadn’t gone well! So cried in a McDonald’s when they rang with the good news! (In a library reading a Jo Brand book with Pedro the chin! )
My pets mean more to me than anyone/anything in my life. Sounds terrible with having lots of family and close friends of years etc but it’s how I feel! I’ve struggled and got (even more) ill with epilepsy and seizures caring for them but That’s my choice because they’re my world!

You definitely don’t need to get a grip, or feel bad for thinking that, sure we all totally understand on here and have had our hearts (and brains at times!) broken with our beasties.
But I agree with @daveclark79, I just try to care for them as best I can while they’re in my life now. This year I’ve really tried to change my thinking, I was a paranoid wreck last year living at vets and doing so much with my bubs, I’m trying to just enjoy them as much as I can now (although it’s hard when you suffer from anxiety like myself!) and try not to think ahead too much about what could happen etc xx

 

[Flutterby]

 

[Lady Kelly]

Huge hugs for you. I had a similar feeling recently when reviewing the ages and realising how old Daisy is now (She's over 6 years old but still looks like a 1 year old). Even my baby is over 2 years old now

 

[David Piggie Lover]

Deep and thoughtful vibes to you.
I'm newish to piggies and when I lost my 1st one Pedro . 3 Years or so ago. I was unexpectly hurt deeply my friends and family and these wonderful people on here . . . Helped. .
I struggled as I wanted him to be there when I retire etc. . My friends bless um don't take the mick Now cos they know how deeply i love my poop machines
Now i have lost 4 (and I would not change anything) and have 2 brill piggies now
Time has allowed me to reflect . . . .
We all and I've explained to children who lose their Dog Cat Hamster or any animal that we only borrow them until Rainbow World. . . It's what we do with that time with us what is important and the pain we feel when they become ill or die or pts means we've done a great job.
You a great piggie slave. X

 

[piggieminder]

I know exactly how you feel. Earlier this year I wanted to rehome mine after them having one illness after another. I felt I was doing something wrong that made them ill and when I had to let them go it was because I was a useless nurse. I nursed Bracken for 4 months after stone surgery and then had him PTS when he got another stone in his kidney, Spike for 6 months with a URI that went into pneumonia, I had to let him go in the end, I syringe fed Peanut for 6 weeks after his abscess removal due to a bad reaction to something he was given, he's still going strong now but it was touch and go. In January Rusty had bladder stone surgery and I'm dreading hearing him squeaky wee again. The illnesses and losses make me feel so inadequate. For over a year I had stretches of months when I hardly had time to leave the house due to fitting in feeding and medication. I completely lost last summer, my partner is brilliant and understands sick piggies come first but we didn't even have a day out together. They give me a lot of pleasure, I couldn't let them go, who would put up with and understand all their individual funny little ways? Now I try to take each day as it comes, I can only do my best, I can't promise them a long life but I can make every day a good one. I feel I shan't have any more. It's time for me, I'm not getting any younger but that would leave some pig on his own.

 

[LMPigs]

Honestly, I think it would be strange to be caring for an unwell animal and not to feel worried or upset about it!

It sounds as though you may feel that you would be judged for talking about this in the non forum world, e.g. at work. Do you think that trying to keep the way you're feeling under wraps could be making the stress worse? I would think that other pet owners should be able to understand - you can always make the connection explicit e.g. "I'm really worried about my guinea pig at the moment, has your poodle ever had any health issues?" Hopefully the ability to vent on the forum helps in any case

By the way, I suspect it's different as a child/teenager Vs adult for a couple of reasons. Young children aren't very good at empathy in general but also probably when you were a child or even a teen you weren't actually responsible for treatment decisions - an adult would have been there to support you on that. As a grown up, you know the buck stops with you so that inevitably is going to feel heavier.

 

[Merab]

Sorry you are having a rough time at present.
My heart goes out to you as I currently have a terminally ill 5 year old.
We feel because we care and one of the things I really value about this forum is the support and understanding.
No-one here thinks it’s odd or silly to be upset about a sick piggy, or to spend pots of money on vet bills.
I don’t believe that death is necessarily painful, especially if we’ve had to pts. I am certain that afterwards is absolutely fantastic- unlimited carrots because they’re not bad for you anymore ( for humans the equivalent is chocolate) - and that is not me being flippant.

Keep on using the forum for support. We’re here for each other

 

[BlueBird]

Thank you all for your kind words. I definitely need those virtual hugs right now...! It's not really fun in our house right now. Particularly @Merab's Slave, @LMPigs and @VickiA. You're words were particularly helpful.

I have one pig with dental problems, one with a URI that anti-biotics just won't fix. My last pig who had to go to the emergency vets yesterday for some happy juice after being in so much pain she couldn't walk. This morning she was given 3 potential outcomes from our usual vets. The first is that she's damaged her lumbar spine which could heal with time and a bit of R&R, the second is that this back injury is so severe she will never recover from and will be permanently on pain killers (there are other therapies we could give her but that feels a bit like chasing the sunset at this point). The third outcome is that her bladder stones have returned. After 2 major abdominal surgeries, of which one was only this January to remove a bladder stone, I'm not comfortable pursuing this either. It feels unfair to put her under another major op when it "buys" less than 6month's of health. Particularly as she's a timid piggy and doesn't cover very well from surgery. Mr BlueBird hates seeing the pigs all wobbly and painful after surgery in normal circumstances let alone with the "she may never recover" shadow looming over us.

In a way hearing "palliative care" from the vets was a bit of a relief which is a bit of a horrible thing to say but its true. It removes a bit of the anxiety of whether this is the illness that finally gets them. While I wasn't exactly expecting it to be the pig it was. One of our pigs being lead off by Lady Death has been on my mind for a while. It often crosses my mind as I come down the stairs to give them their breakfast. Would I find one passed away in their sleep? But of course this is the bit of a fairytale that has only been supported by my experiences as a child where we would go away for a weekend leaving the pigs with a friend only to find one had already gone in the cage. The reality is your finger is always hovering over the PTS button. I simultaneously feel selfish about keeping them alive and putting them down. Am I cutting their life short or don't the best for them? Am I keeping them around for me or because it's not yet their time.

While this isn't necessarily the end of the road for Bonnie. If she does pull through its another entry in a long list of 'almosts' for her. I'm sure if Death was a person, when she finally met them they would greet each other as old friends. She's the pig that I'm sure everyone has in their herd at some point. The one who always seems to be picking up illnesses or injuring themselves. As a result, our vet knows her very well.

As I say, I find their illnesses very stressful and upsetting but their actual death less so. Perhaps this is my own outlook on death pushing my mourning process forward in the timeline which also means I get a lot of false starts. But this is just a theory - perhaps a naive and wishful one based on my experience as a 19-20 year old watching the last of my family pigs die. Again, their death was sad. One of which I found, but I had a little weep as I cleaned them and wrapped them up in an old shirt ready for burial, and going out into the garden to find dandelion flowers for them and then I was fine. But as @LMPigs mentioned, maybe it was just that ultimately the buck didn't stop with me so emotionally I had a back stop.

Interesting to hear from @Little Ones that guinea pigs are more expensive than cats or dogs. Having never had either I can't compare. It does sort of make sense though as guinea pigs are small therefore more difficult to operate if they need it and I guess they are more of a special interest and therefore more expensive as their is less competition ...? That's on top of the fact they are pray animals which I expect means they have higher stress levels which lead to more illnesses. In a creature that is biologically intended to multiply as much as possible and play the biological numbers game its hardly surprising they would get ill so often.

It sounds as though you may feel that you would be judged for talking about this in the non forum world, e.g. at work. Do you think that trying to keep the way you're feeling under wraps could be making the stress worse? I would think that other pet owners should be able to understand - you can always make the connection explicit e.g. "I'm really worried about my guinea pig at the moment, has your poodle ever had any health issues?" Hopefully the ability to vent on the forum helps in any case

Actually I'm quite lucky at work right now. My manager doesn't really care what I'm doing so long as I get the work done. He's really hands off that way. So tomorrow when I take Harvey back to Northlands I asked for the morning off to do it. I told him that almost all of my work right now is waiting for other people so I'd not be missing a deadline for it. So he was fine with it. However, at my previous job they were so bad at managing people that I'd doubt I'd have been able to get time off for vet appointments. I asked for time off for a physio appointment to fix my back once and the reply was "It's OK this time, but if you need other appointments it needs to be out-of-hours". Hence why I know that in most cases people would look at you funny if you said I'm grieving cause I just lost a guinea pig. My current job might understand but I think that's because I have such a chilled manager. The nature of my work is a bit feast and famine and my manager knows I put the work in at crunch time so he's fine giving me slack when my workload is a bit thin. Particularly now in these weird times. But I will certainly bank that for future if I do get weird looks. I know my boss's eyes watered when I told him the cost of Bonnie's vet bill. He teased me (but not in a nasty way) that he could have bought me a new one instead but I know he understood ... as much as a non-guinea owner could. He spends stupid amounts on cars so I guess he could relate a little.

Mr BlueBird was one of those dads that said "IF we get guinea pigs they are YOUR pets!". Now he's perhaps even more attached to them as I am. Though he does have the habit of leaving me to deal with the vets trips as I seem to have a better eye at finding something wrong with them which, again, makes things hard. Because he loves them so much he's a bit reluctant to get more if and when our pigs leave us. He says that any other pig won't feel the same and won't be as good as our current herd. [He's been spoiled as Belle lived as a single guinea for most of her younger years so she's super tame and sassy and it's clear we'll never get another one like her]. But in our massive 6x2 cage, looking at 2 guineas might feel a bit lonely and in our flat without animals at all would feel very strange. We are only a few years from moving to a house and once their Mr BlueBird wants to get a dog like he had in his childhood and worries that Dogs and Guineas don't mix which to some extent is true! For me though, when I dreamed of our new house, I imagined a guinea shed and a veggie patch to feed them (though granted I'm sure if I had a farm it wouldn't be enough veg for little poop machines like guineas. Whichever we do go for though I do wonder whether the stress of their illnesses is good for me and whether it is better for me to admire animals from afar. I have contemplated fostering guineas. That way they probably leave before I have to deal with an illness but if they come in with illnesses at least they are ill before they've wormed their way into your heart.

It my darker days I feel like "No more guineas! Its too painful and I need to look after my sanity". Then on my brighter days like today I'm like "Maybe just one more". So we'll see how it goes. I know my mum will be disappointed if we don't get anymore guineas. She loves her grandpigs!

 

[Little Ones]

Gosh, it seems like it’s been quite full on for you recently, no wonder you’re getting so worried and upset!
Yep, with guinea pigs being prey animals, illnesses just take to them. And when they do get an illness which requires some investigation you can be looking at hundreds (X-ray, blood test, anaesthetic, ultrasound, maybe even a poo or wee sample). With our cat (who is 11 today!), the only extra costs are vaccines (once a year), flea preventative and worm preventative. He also has asthma so we get medication for it every 6 months or so. With my pigs, I’ve spent a few thousand pounds now over the last four/five years on three piggies. The last eleven years with a cat has probably only be slightly over a thousand. The fact that Guinea pigs are advertised as a children’s pet is beyond me as, ideally, you need to have a large vet fund saved or financial stability. They really are a huge commitment, especially for animals that aren’t typically as ‘involved’ in family life like a cat or a dog.