Oh dear I have been reported to the GPU!

Betsy

Betsy

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Dear Slave

It has come to my attention that you have been keeping something from me, Lexi and Meg. We may have 4 corner tunnels and even a 3 way tunnel from Aunty @Lavinia but we NEED a monster tunnel too. There is absolutely no way we believe that you have mislaid the other monster tunnel. How can you do that? By it's very name it's huge how can you lose something that big?!?

We know you have just asked Aunty Lavinia to make us a monster tunnel, but don't you think for one minute that this will stop you being reported to GPU HQ. It will not. The three of us held a Betsy Towers Committee Meeting such is the seriousness of this offence. Meg, as the eldest was the Chairpig, Lexi was the Secretary and took the Minutes (so we can refer back as necessary) and I was there as the GP Union Rep. It was decided by a unanimous vote of 3 that we will stage a protest by being even more tricky to pick up, wheak louder for food, demand veggies early and do lots of poops so you have to poop pick more often. We discussed whether we would finish the protest once the new monster tunnel has arrived and we decided to wait and see if it is to our liking.

Yours feeling very deprived

The One and Only Thea
Shop Steward.
 
Dear Friends,
I am horrified to learn that you are being forced to wait for Aunty @Lavinia to make you a monster tunnel.
Surely your slave should have been better organised and ordered one for you sooner.
I hope your letter to the GPU has a positive effect.
I agree that extra poops are called for.
I am a poop champion so I can send you extra if you want.

Love from Priscilla.
Micah is asleep or he would add his paw 🐾
 
Piggle is asking, what is a Monster tunnel please? Why does she not have one? It sounds like the ideal accompaniment to here new giant oblong donut couch bed that is almost half a metre long and just perfect for relaxing her impressive piggly combat buttocks...
Please tell us about this new luxury furniture development she is being deprived of!
 
PigglePuggle said:
Piggle is asking, what is a Monster tunnel please? Why does she not have one? It sounds like the ideal accompaniment to here new giant oblong donut couch bed that is almost half a metre long and just perfect for relaxing her impressive piggly combat buttocks...
Please tell us about this new luxury furniture development she is being deprived of!
Click to expand...


Dear Piggle

Aunty Lavinia custom makes the Monster tunnels for a very reasonable price. Maybe you should wait and see what our Monster Tunnel is like and if you like it steal your Slave's Credit Card in the middle of the night and get ordering. When it arrives you can be sure that we will show it on this thread.

Wheaks
Meg, Thea and Lexi
Betsy Towers
The Hutch
The Garage
 
Piggle will have to wait until piggy mummy payday having already disposed of June's disposable income on piggy luxury furniture (piggy mummy also remembers that thread where everyone was saying what piggies cost per month and it seems only the PigglePuggles come in at over £200 every month before the vet bills and luxury furnishings are accounted for!) but we would be very excited to see monster tunnels in action- Piggle and Lavender are both rather large girls especially around the buttocks... and very heavy on the furniture!
 
Dear The One and Only Thea,

We are horrified at your lack of a Monster Bed. We don't actually know what it is, but we currently have four beds, two cuddle cups under a fleecy forest each for our Snugglesafes, two bendy log tunnels, AND two fleece tunnels in our abode currently. You are clearly being deprived!
Dad did mutter something about being very tired and "the washing" and probably a bit of swearing too, but what does he know? Yeah exactly.

We wish you good luck, this can't be allowed to continue and we are absolutely outraged on your behalf.

Yours,
Bann and Camowen.
 
Oh heck! 😂

I will try and get the tunnel made this weekend but I hope you can forgive me and your slave if there is a delay on account of the snug pigs accountant, Puppy George, being quite unwell at the moment. If he is feeling up to it he may be able to get the books in order for me to do some sewing!

I have only made two of the Mega Tunnels (or as I like to call them Monster tunnels!) so far and they do seem to be enjoyed by their new owners. My own pigs will likely be in touch with you soon to lodge a complaint since they had one ear marked for themselves and I haphazardly allowed @Rivervixen piggys to buy it!

Terribly sorry in advance for any possible delay and also the stress and upset it is causing by you not already having your paws on your very own Mega Monster Tunnel! I hope to rectify this asap.

Love Aunty Lavinia x


Ps- this was a custom Mega Monster Tunnel I made a couple of weeks ago for some piggies from instagram!
7BDB8DC1-CF0D-46FA-B2B9-5B33D61C9715.jpeg
 
Lavinia said:
Oh heck! 😂

I will try and get the tunnel made this weekend but I hope you can forgive me and your slave if there is a delay on account of the snug pigs accountant, Puppy George, being quite unwell at the moment. If he is feeling up to it he may be able to get the books in order for me to do some sewing!

I have only made two of the Mega Tunnels (or as I like to call them Monster tunnels!) so far and they do seem to be enjoyed by their new owners. My own pigs will likely be in touch with you soon to lodge a complaint since they had one ear marked for themselves and I haphazardly allowed @Rivervixen piggys to buy it!

Terribly sorry in advance for any possible delay and also the stress and upset it is causing by you not already having your paws on your very own Mega Monster Tunnel! I hope to rectify this asap.

Love Aunty Lavinia x


Ps- this was a custom Mega Monster Tunnel I made a couple of weeks ago for some piggies from instagram!
View attachment 205370
Click to expand...
Piggle would like to say in advance that she wants to buy one of these for piggy mummy's october birthday, so mummy can admire Piggle sitting in the middle of it like a fat-bottomed queen completely ignoring the fact that it is actually a tunnel and that her 6 friends may want a turn and might like to use it as a real tunnel :)
 
PigglePuggle said:
Piggle would like to say in advance that she wants to buy one of these for piggy mummy's october birthday, so mummy can admire Piggle sitting in the middle of it like a fat-bottomed queen completely ignoring the fact that it is actually a tunnel and that her 6 friends may want a turn and might like to use it as a real tunnel :)
Click to expand...
I know full well that this is exactly how my lot will use it too! Hahaha
 
Lavinia said:
Oh heck! 😂

I will try and get the tunnel made this weekend but I hope you can forgive me and your slave if there is a delay on account of the snug pigs accountant, Puppy George, being quite unwell at the moment. If he is feeling up to it he may be able to get the books in order for me to do some sewing!

I have only made two of the Mega Tunnels (or as I like to call them Monster tunnels!) so far and they do seem to be enjoyed by their new owners. My own pigs will likely be in touch with you soon to lodge a complaint since they had one ear marked for themselves and I haphazardly allowed @Rivervixen piggys to buy it!

Terribly sorry in advance for any possible delay and also the stress and upset it is causing by you not already having your paws on your very own Mega Monster Tunnel! I hope to rectify this asap.

Love Aunty Lavinia x


Ps- this was a custom Mega Monster Tunnel I made a couple of weeks ago for some piggies from instagram!
View attachment 205370
Click to expand...

Dear Aunty Lavinia

We do understand there may be a delay as your Accountant Puppy George may not be able to get the books in order as he is unwell. It's not nice feeling ill and we wouldn't want to make him feel he has to get the Snug Pigs account in order and make himself worse because of us. We hope Puppy George feels better soon so that we (Lexi) can enjoy our (her) new Mega Monster Tunnel.

Healing wheaks being sent to your Accountant

Lexi, Thea and Meg
 
Betsy said:
Dear Aunty Lavinia

We do understand there may be a delay as your Accountant Puppy George may not be able to get the books in order as he is unwell. It's not nice feeling ill and we wouldn't want to make him feel he has to get the Snug Pigs account in order and make himself worse because of us. We hope Puppy George feels better soon so that we (Lexi) can enjoy our (her) new Mega Monster Tunnel.

Healing wheaks being sent to your Accountant

Lexi, Thea and Meg
Click to expand...
Dear Lexi, Thea and Meg,

He’s had lots of cuddles from me all week as I took the time off from work to look after him and give him all his medicine. But he’s got to be a brave pup this week as I need to go back to work so hopefully he will be ok. He says thanks for the wheeks. He sometimes hears those strange noises from upstairs and sometimes on his way up to bed finds some yummy piggy poo nuggets on the floor if I haven’t swept up properly. He said if you wanted to send some yummy poos to him instead of throwing them at your slave, he might be able to usher me along faster for you!

Woof woof! 🐶

x
 
But if you look closely in the background it looks like all their hidey bridges have been cruelly upended to scare them into instagrammable tunnel compliance...
We'll have none of that here says Piggle I want a purpley coloured one pre-ordering please, I like that leopard print lining too reminds me of that cat I almost ate once, for october, just PM and bill that big daft hooman female after she's been drinking that "magic grape juice" that we give her on shopping days, and Piggle will show the piggies of instagram what we do with luxury furniture items!
Love and scary buttocks,
Piggle x
 
PigglePuggle said:
But if you look closely in the background it looks like all their hidey bridges have been cruelly upended to scare them into instagrammable tunnel compliance...
We'll have none of that here says Piggle I want a purpley coloured one pre-ordering please, I like that leopard print lining too reminds me of that cat I almost ate once, for october, just PM and bill that big daft hooman female after she's been drinking that "magic grape juice" that we give her on shopping days, and Piggle will show the piggies of instagram what we do with luxury furniture items!
Love and scary buttocks,
Piggle x
Click to expand...
Those Instagram piggies and slaves are strange ones. Not like us forum lot. 😂
Ooh I’m impressed you nearly ate a cat, yes you should proudly display that and lounge on it like a nice rug 😂
I’ll get that all set aside for you Piggle no problem! X
 
PigglePuggle said:
But if you look closely in the background it looks like all their hidey bridges have been cruelly upended to scare them into instagrammable tunnel compliance...
We'll have none of that here says Piggle I want a purpley coloured one pre-ordering please, I like that leopard print lining too reminds me of that cat I almost ate once, for october, just PM and bill that big daft hooman female after she's been drinking that "magic grape juice" that we give her on shopping days, and Piggle will show the piggies of instagram what we do with luxury furniture items!
Love and scary buttocks,
Piggle x
Click to expand...

Dear Piggle

Demand that your "big daft hooman female" sings you the piggy hornpipe when she's been drinking her "magic grape juice" while paying for your new luxury tunnel.

Wheaky wheaks
Lexi
 
Betsy said:
Dear Piggle

Demand that your "big daft hooman female" sings you the piggy hornpipe when she's been drinking her "magic grape juice" while paying for your new luxury tunnel.

Wheaky wheaks
Lexi
Click to expand...
Piggle has been having to endure piggy-themed remixes of Liverpool Male Voice Choir's patriotic jubilee concert songs from piggy daddy recently! She quite likes "Rule Britannia" if it mentions hay :)
 
There is now an uproar from the pig room. All 7 of my pigs are now DEMANDING their slave stops talking about getting back into sewing for them, and actually START sewing for them.
They are chanting ‘Weeeee want neeeew tunnels WHeeeeeeeeee want new tunnels WHEEEEEEEEEEEE WANT NEW TUNNELS’
Thanks a lot Thea! you’ve got my work cut out for me! I don’t have time to make one let alone 3! (One for each cage!)
If Lavinia wasn’t so far away I’d place an order instead!
 
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