Beautifulmess
Adult Guinea Pig
Well this week I thought I had finally come out of my depression, I've been able to go out more (post office) and such. I've done a good amount of cleaning so the place actually looks nice and kept on top of washing up.
Today I woke up at 7:10am, got ready by 8am which is a record for me, as my depression makes me so slow. Anyways, I was quite happy, got some nice post, made breakfast, spoke to the maintaince man who came to look at my unopenable window.
My ESA claim was cancelled on the 4th due to failing my medical, I really wish they'd use the right doctor, it's quite annoying, GP's know nothing about mental problems. Anyways, I rang up today to confirm I'd done everything they told me to, to appeal the decision and I found out that they won't give me any money until my appeal is accepted or not (whether I can take it to court or not). I found out I wasn't going to be paid until the decision was made which will be around Monday or Tuesday (I should be paid next Wednesday 16th). I owe water, tv, electric and also need to send some parcels out AND be able to feed myself and my pigs. (altho I don't think their food will go down that quick).
Then on Monday the decision could be that they disapprove of the appeal and don't let it pass, which means I'm to sign onto Job Seekers and end up waiting 3-4 weeks for my first payment off them also! :'(
I started the week and day on such a high, getting better with each day even after a horrible fall out with the boyfriend Sunday night and suffering with PMT. It's like, I got shot down as soon as I pick up, and it's always by the benefit agency. Last time they forked me a £4K debt which I've now had written off but boy that was hard work and the housing likes to bite you hard so I had to go in every week to give all my bank evidence to them to prove I couldn't pay my rent.
I'm just ranting tbh, I'm trying to keep my mood up some how but even seeing the boyfriend tonight isn't exciting me much. I'm wondering if I do actually have Borderline Personality Desorder like my psych once said but at the same time I don't want it and she told me on OUR first meeting :S
Sitting on phone now to the housing, to advise them that I have no money to pay rent and my benefits are 'in between' right now.
thanks for reading
Today I woke up at 7:10am, got ready by 8am which is a record for me, as my depression makes me so slow. Anyways, I was quite happy, got some nice post, made breakfast, spoke to the maintaince man who came to look at my unopenable window.
My ESA claim was cancelled on the 4th due to failing my medical, I really wish they'd use the right doctor, it's quite annoying, GP's know nothing about mental problems. Anyways, I rang up today to confirm I'd done everything they told me to, to appeal the decision and I found out that they won't give me any money until my appeal is accepted or not (whether I can take it to court or not). I found out I wasn't going to be paid until the decision was made which will be around Monday or Tuesday (I should be paid next Wednesday 16th). I owe water, tv, electric and also need to send some parcels out AND be able to feed myself and my pigs. (altho I don't think their food will go down that quick).
Then on Monday the decision could be that they disapprove of the appeal and don't let it pass, which means I'm to sign onto Job Seekers and end up waiting 3-4 weeks for my first payment off them also! :'(
I started the week and day on such a high, getting better with each day even after a horrible fall out with the boyfriend Sunday night and suffering with PMT. It's like, I got shot down as soon as I pick up, and it's always by the benefit agency. Last time they forked me a £4K debt which I've now had written off but boy that was hard work and the housing likes to bite you hard so I had to go in every week to give all my bank evidence to them to prove I couldn't pay my rent.
I'm just ranting tbh, I'm trying to keep my mood up some how but even seeing the boyfriend tonight isn't exciting me much. I'm wondering if I do actually have Borderline Personality Desorder like my psych once said but at the same time I don't want it and she told me on OUR first meeting :S
Sitting on phone now to the housing, to advise them that I have no money to pay rent and my benefits are 'in between' right now.
thanks for reading