Sorry, I need a rant. I have just stopped crying. I hate crying cause I always feel like the other side has won :'(
I have recently come back to work after being after 5 months with stress, which led to depression. If any of you have suffered with this, you will know what I mean when I say its hell on earth. I have never felt so low in my entire life, and its a VERY scary place to be... I went back to work, and was told by HR that I could work 3 days a week and because I'm on anti-depression tablets, if I ever felt poorly, just to go off as they would expect it. I thought, wow they are being ace! That lasted about two weeks. They were supposed to be putting me with someone for about a month to get my confidence back as I drive around the North West, North East & Midlands fixing computers, servers etc etc, but I had one day with someone and that was that. Then two months into it they started complaining saying they wanted me back full time, but I stood my ground and said no I wasn't ready. There were soooo many days where I had bad migraines, or felt sick cause of the tablets, but went into work cause I didn't want to appear I was 'taking the mickey'. As each week went on until about now, they have been throwing more and more at me and making me feel like I've done something wrong. My boss wont speak to me, and neither will his boss
Today is my first day back after being on my hols, and I went in and got called into a meeting about going back full time. My teamleader (Who is clueless and a jobsworth) told me I had to come back full time as management wanted it. Also that if I took anymore time off poorly, I would get faced with HR and sent to Occupational Health, and then decided to drop in at the end I have a disciplinary next week with the big boss over expenses, but they wont tell me what it's about... I tried to keep a hard face on it all, to have my TL say that I had made it much easier for him by taking it so well! YEAH RIGHT - I got back to my office and broke my heart.
I have been home and had my tea now, and have just stopped crying
Thank god for Steve, who just held me.... :'( :'( :'(
Sooo low at the moment
I've finished my rant now sorry... just needed to get it out I think.... Thanks for reading
T x
I have recently come back to work after being after 5 months with stress, which led to depression. If any of you have suffered with this, you will know what I mean when I say its hell on earth. I have never felt so low in my entire life, and its a VERY scary place to be... I went back to work, and was told by HR that I could work 3 days a week and because I'm on anti-depression tablets, if I ever felt poorly, just to go off as they would expect it. I thought, wow they are being ace! That lasted about two weeks. They were supposed to be putting me with someone for about a month to get my confidence back as I drive around the North West, North East & Midlands fixing computers, servers etc etc, but I had one day with someone and that was that. Then two months into it they started complaining saying they wanted me back full time, but I stood my ground and said no I wasn't ready. There were soooo many days where I had bad migraines, or felt sick cause of the tablets, but went into work cause I didn't want to appear I was 'taking the mickey'. As each week went on until about now, they have been throwing more and more at me and making me feel like I've done something wrong. My boss wont speak to me, and neither will his boss

Today is my first day back after being on my hols, and I went in and got called into a meeting about going back full time. My teamleader (Who is clueless and a jobsworth) told me I had to come back full time as management wanted it. Also that if I took anymore time off poorly, I would get faced with HR and sent to Occupational Health, and then decided to drop in at the end I have a disciplinary next week with the big boss over expenses, but they wont tell me what it's about... I tried to keep a hard face on it all, to have my TL say that I had made it much easier for him by taking it so well! YEAH RIGHT - I got back to my office and broke my heart.


Sooo low at the moment

I've finished my rant now sorry... just needed to get it out I think.... Thanks for reading

T x