We lost our boy yesterday and I am devastated.

[Ellislou92]

He was his usual happy self at the beginning of this week. He was sleeping a little more than usual in the evenings and mostly in his hut (he often pancaked in the open) but we paid no mind as he otherwise seemed normal. By Thursday I noticed he was eating less fresh food but he was eating hay normally, taking treats and eating the bits of fresh food he liked most. He again seemed OK on Friday morning, albeit a little less active but by the afternoon he was struggling to breathe and making strange noises. As soon as I realised how bad it was, I rushed him to the vet.
We were advised that his best bet was to remain at the vets as they could provide him with oxygen therapy. At this point I thought he'd be ok so I agreed.
He passed away in the early hours of Saturday morning, and the guilt I feel for not being there is so immense. I miss our boy so much and I'm struggling so hard to accept his passing. I should have noticed sooner and I should have been with him. I still don't know what caused his death. They initially suspected he had pneumonia but they weren't sure if it was after monitoring him as his only symptom was difficulty breathing.

He was only 3. I can't believe he's gone...

I am finding it difficult to cope at the moment and I'm trying to make sense of it. I don't know where else to vent so apologies for rambling. Just hoping for any advice to help make things better.

 

[Merab]

So sorry for your loss.

This is the right place and the best place to vent and express your grief.
We understand how painful the loss of a piggy can be.
Your feelings and all the questions are a normal part of grieving.
You made the best decision for your boy at the time, and you made that good decision out of love.

Grief is painful and takes time so be gentle with yourself.

 

[Ellislou92]

So sorry for your loss.

This is the right place and the best place to vent and express your grief.
We understand how painful the loss of a piggy can be.
Your feelings and all the questions are a normal part of grieving.
You made the best decision for your boy at the time, and you made that good decision out of love.

Grief is painful and takes time so be gentle with yourself.

I appreciate your response. I just keep thinking of all the things I could have done differently/all the questions I should have asked. Had I known he was likely to pass I would have made sure he came home, but it really did seem as though he had a chance. I miss him so terribly.

 

[Merab]

This is perfectly normal.
With any loss we ask ourselves the “ What if……” questions.
He will always live in your heart but at the moment your grief is new and very raw.
I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but this rawness will ease.

The forum has a bereavement section and you may find some helpful resources there.
Sorry I can’t link it for you but I lack the tech skills.
Someone will come along who can do that for you.

 

[Pound Shilling & Pig]

So sorry you have lost your boy. Guilt is a normal but painful part of grieving. You took him to the vet as soon as you realised he was struggling and left him there to give him the best chance of recovery. Had you taken him home you most likely now be feeling guilt that you hadn't given him that chance, so remember you acted out of love. Questioning your actions shows you are a caring and compassionate person and are deserving of self compassion too x

 

[Ellislou92]

Thank you so much for your responses. I just feel incredibly lost at the moment. I'll have a look for the bereavement section - I appreciate the tip!
I loved him so very, very much. I just hope he knew that.
This guilt is so consuming. Grief is an awful thing lol

 

[h_and_piggies]

Sorry for your loss. I’m sure your piggy knew how much they were loved. Sleep tight little one x

 

[munchmonster]

The emotions you are experiencing right now are emotions we have all gone through on this forum at some stage when we have lost a much loved pet. He would have known he was loved and leaves you with heartache now but eventually this will fade and happy memories will stay with you.
Run free over the rainbow bridge little piggie x

 

[Idris]

Sorry for your loss. We’ve been there too and even had specialist vets struggle to diagnose/prescribe effective treatment. It’s a fine balance between being worried about every little change in behaviour and spotting something more serious early enough to make a difference so please don’t be too tough on yourself. We all learn along the way and miss them all.

 

[Bill & Ted]

I’m so sorry you lost your little piggie, sending big hugs. he will have known just how much you cared and loved him

Sleep tight little man