COVID-19 What would you do?

[Spaghetti & Noodles]

I am looking for other people's thoughts........

My daughter is 11, she is desperate to see a friend, they are talking on the phone etc but would like to meet up, the friend does not live in our village so would be brought over.

Now I know the guidance States you can meet one person outside, for exercise, but I am really torn. It is not an essential journey and they would have to stay outside. There isn't really anything to do in our village, other than go for a walk.
Working at the local primary, we are really struggling with our children that we have in and all of the talk of mixing etc, we are making it clear they should not be having play dates etc (and should not have all been sledding together!) If I allow this meet up I would be no better than those families but my daughter's well being and friendship might suffer?
I have discussed this with her and I think she understands but I'm not sure what to do for the best, my gut instinct is to say no. (Making me the worst parent in the world in her eyes)

Not a major issue but would appreciate others thoughts.

 

[Claire W]

It is hard but I would follow your gut instinct. If you allow your daughter to see her friend, you’re going against your own principles and it’s no fun having to stay outside in this weather.

Explain to your daughter that it won’t be forever and she can still talk to her friend over the phone. Could they talk via video chat?

 

[Spaghetti & Noodles]

It is hard but I would follow your gut instinct. If you allow your daughter to see her friend, you’re going against your own principles and it’s no fun having to stay outside in this weather.

Explain to your daughter that it won’t be forever and she can still talk to her friend over the phone. Could they talk via video chat?

Thank you, I think it's right too say no and completely agree with you, I have to lead by example and if that makes me unpopular then so be it, it's my job as a parent to keep my children safe.
It's so hard as I completely get it, I so want to just have a coffee with a friend and do something normal but we just can't.
They do talk most days via video chat, sometimes when they are supposed to be working!
Thanks for reading, sometimes you just need someone else to say your not being unreasonable!

 

[Swissgreys]

Sticking to the rules and setting a good example is not unreasonable.
It is such a hard time for our kids, and one of my daughter's really struggled mentally during the first lock down.
It was so hard for her to look outside and see kids playing in groups on our street, and to hear me saying she could not go outside and mix.
But I almost feel that right now more than ever the example we set will have a longer term effect on our kids.
We are teaching them to be socially responsible and do the right thing even when we could probably get away with not doing the right thing.
Doing the right thing is often the hardest path, but no one really knows who is potentially going to give them this virus so it is better not to take unnecessary risks.

My heart goes out to your daughter but you are doing a wonderful job of leading by example.

 

[Spaghetti & Noodles]

Sticking to the rules and setting a good example is not unreasonable.
It is such a hard time for our kids, and one of my daughter's really struggled mentally during the first lock down.
It was so hard for her to look outside and see kids playing in groups on our street, and to hear me saying she could not go outside and mix.
But I almost feel that right now more than ever the example we set will have a longer term effect on our kids.
We are teaching them to be socially responsible and do the right thing even when we could probably get away with not doing the right thing.
Doing the right thing is often the hardest path, but no one really knows who is potentially going to give them this virus so it is better not to take unnecessary risks.

My heart goes out to your daughter but you are doing a wonderful job of leading by example.

Thank you. We could probably get away with it where we live as it's a quiet place bit that doesn't make it right.

 

[Claire W]

It’s so hard when others aren’t following the rules. I’m glad that they can talk via video chat. I’m sure your daughter will understand that you’re thinking about her well being and safety.
You’re a great mum

 

[Lady Kelly]

I just have to say that although your daughter appears to understand I very much doubt she grasps the full reality of what's going on across the world. I say this because I often stop and try to get my head round it and can't fully grasp it! It's strange times we are living in and even if she sees it as unreasonable now there will come a time when she appreciates everything you did to keep her safe

 

[Hath]

I think if a child is really suffering mentally and needs to speak to her best friend outdoors whilst socially distancing and wearing masks I wouldn't blame you for letting her. Obviously with parental supervision. However, if it's just missing her friend, like we all do, then caution is priority. Like you said, you're held to a higher standard and expected to follow rules.

I am extremely lucky my daughter is dealing with this situation well. Even though she's fed up, spending time video chatting with her best friend seems to be enough atm. They have Nintendo games where they can meet in a game, whilst talking via WhatsApp at the same time.

It's not my place to shame other people if they're on the brink of mental breakdown.

I mean, my neighbour's still have family over at least 3 nights a week and definitely not for bubble support as it's different people and it's always an evening catch up rather than childcare help
Not to mention kids get mixed messages when we tell them to stay away from people and then they're allowed to go back to school with 150+ kids on a bubble without masks and sitting next to each other all day

 

[Spaghetti & Noodles]

I just have to say that although your daughter appears to understand I very much doubt she grasps the full reality of what's going on across the world. I say this because I often stop and try to get my head round it and can't fully grasp it! It's strange times we are living in and even if she sees it as unreasonable now there will come a time when she appreciates everything you did to keep her safe

I think you're right, I often struggle to get my head around how we are living and what is going on in the world, I think what I meant was she does understand my reasoning even if she doesn't fully grasp what is going on, I do hope one day she will appreciate why I do things for her and that I am just looking out for her and all of us. A few days being unpopular is better than us being ill. I'm also testing twice a week for work, I'd hate to be the one that causes us to close our bubble or school because we'd not been careful, it's bad enough going to the supermarket, but that has to be done.

 

[Rivervixen]

I just have to say that although your daughter appears to understand I very much doubt she grasps the full reality of what's going on across the world. I say this because I often stop and try to get my head round it and can't fully grasp it! It's strange times we are living in and even if she sees it as unreasonable now there will come a time when she appreciates everything you did to keep her safe

I’m with you on this, I still wake up everyday wondering what’s going on and realising it’s just another day of lockdown such a tough time x