Your Experiences Needed!

[Wiebke]

In our next Guinea Pig Magazine issues we are dealing with aspects around losing guinea pigs and grieving.

We would love to hear about your experiences with pts/euthanasia, knowing/figuring out when the right time has come with a very ill guinea pig, dealing with an unexpected death, realising your guinea pig was dying/having a guinea pig dying in your arms etc.

We would also love hear your experiences with grieving and the grieving process; what has helped you and what was the worst aspect and time for you and what did you struggle with most; if you have them, experiences with using a pet bereavement line or other outlets etc.

And lastly, do you have any rituals for a send-off, ways to mark their resting place or any special memorials? If you have cremation urns, what do you do with them?

Please post either in this thread or send your answers to alison@guineapigmagazine.

Thank you!

@Guinea Pig Magazine @MerryPip

 

[Claire W]

I have now lost 10 guinea pigs and each death has brought me nothing but guilt and regret. I go off the rails when I lose a piggy where I cry nonstop and feel overanxious.

The majority of these deaths has been from having the piggies pts. This has brought pain, guilt and regret with every single one even though they were all really poorly at the time.

But the worst death I have had to live with was the death of Emma. She had terminal cancer which I always assumed would take her in the end but it didn’t. Emma died after a tragic accident where I fell unconscious down the stairs. Emma, Ellen and Edward were all free ranging at the time and I fell on Emma killing her instantly.
The guilt was just too much to bear, and I wish it was me dead and not her. Thanks to advice from a kind-hearted friend, I ended up phoning the Blue Cross bereavement line. I will never forgive myself for what happened but the operator and the same friend who suggested the helpline in the first place helped me to understand that it was a tragic accident that caused Emma’s death. I just miss her so much, and it’s hard to deal with the fact that she would still be here now if it wasn’t for me.

Another particularly hard time was when I lost both Ena and Erin just 10 days apart. They were both poorly with different illnesses but losing them both so closely together had a real negative affect on me. I couldn’t eat or sleep through the guilt and the regret of having them pts.

Eliza was 6 and a half when she died. I was heartbroken as she died in my husbands arms but due to her age and the fact she died at home, I didn’t feel as guilty as I knew I had given her a good life. I had my regrets though.

Losing a piggy to me is as bad as losing a loved one and I physically need people to constantly reassure me that things will be ok and that the pain will get easier.

 

[Wiebke]

I have now lost 10 guinea pigs and each death has brought me nothing but guilt and regret. I go off the rails when I lose a piggy where I cry nonstop and feel overanxious.

The majority of these deaths has been from having the piggies pts. This has brought pain, guilt and regret with every single one even though they were all really poorly at the time.

But the worst death I have had to live with was the death of Emma. She had terminal cancer which I always assumed would take her in the end but it didn’t. Emma died after a tragic accident where I fell unconscious down the stairs. Emma, Ellen and Edward were all free ranging at the time and I fell on Emma killing her instantly.
The guilt was just too much to bear, and I wish it was me dead and not her. Thanks to advice from a kind-hearted friend, I ended up phoning the blue cross bereavement line. I will never forgive myself for what happened but the operator and the same friend who suggested the helpline in the first place helped me to understand that it was a tragic accident that caused Emma’s death. I just miss her so much and it’s hard to deal with the fact that she would still be here now if it wasn’t for me.

Another particularly hard time was when I lost both Ena and Erin just 10 days apart. They were both poorly with different illnesses but losing them both so closely together had a real negative affect on me. I couldn’t eat or sleep through the guilt and the regret of having them pts.

Eliza was 6 and a half when she died. I was heartbroken as she died in my husbands arms but due to her age and the fact she died at home, I didn’t feel as guilty as I knew I had given her a good life. I had my regrets though.

Losing a piggy to me is as bad as losing a loved one and I physically need people to constantly reassure me that things will be ok and that the pain will get easier.

Thank you for sharing! I know that this has not been easy for you.

 

[Deleted member 114675]

I have sent an email to Alison - but just want to put a photo of the guineas I have lost on here ...


here is Monty



and my beautiful boar Max

I have regrets about losing Max and Monty as I know in my heart that, had I been more knowledgeable about guinea pig care before I adopted them, maybe I would have avoided the circumstances that led up to their health problems.

​

and - Bess who I found in her forever sleep last week .


Grief is very individualised. I don't have a ritual - or a need to keep my guinea's remains. I have my photograph and the memories I carry in my heart . The biggest comfort to me by doing my best to offer my guineas a good quality of life.

 

[eileen]

i have lost two guinea pigs this year ! both were found in there forever sleep.i do not have any rituals.i have photos and put them in a album.i find the most difficult cavy deaths are the sudden deaths,which both these piggies were,passed away in march.i give all my piggies quality of life,but not quantity.when a piggie is suffering i believe the kindest love you can give is to pts.ive Carlton who has terminal cancer,but i make each day special,i shall find his passing difficult as he has got under my skin.

 

[anyar.dris]

I've lost 3 guinea pigs (hubby has lost 6 of his own in the past).

In May 2014, we adopted Timmy but he had neutering complications that we didn't know before we adopted him. He was with us for only 4 months. The day his operation was done to correct what was wrong with him (Sept. 11, 2014), we had little hope he would make it. Sadly, he passed away in my arms that same night. I was looking after him in our bedroom and when I brought him to the living room with me and he saw the 2 other piggies, Deedee & Meemee, he suddenly started shaking then he passed away. Hubby said he suffered a heart attack then. He probably just wanted to see the girls for the last time. That was so heartbreaking and it was my first time having a piggie passed away in my arms. He was 1 year. old.

Feb. 2, 2016 was when Deedee passed away. She had recurring UTI, bladder & kidney stones (one of her kidneys eventually shut down according to Simon), and at the same time she had a heart condition (fluids in her heart). We were treating her for 10 months from first diagnosis. She had become very resistant of antibiotics because of long time treatments and the last antibiotic we were prescribed was what caused her to deteriorate quickly during her last 2 weeks. The vet informed us that it was quite fatal but it was the last resort. We had to inject the antibiotic to her. The night she passed away, she was still accepting the syringe feeds. She passed away in the middle of the night. Hubby found her outside her box on the floor and looking at the hutch when he woke up. Worst morning as piggie parents for us. She was 4.5 yrs. old.

June 30, 2016 was when Meemee had to be put to sleep. She was our dental piggie. She has to go to Simon every 2-3 weeks for 18 months. During her last week, she suffered a bloat that we cannot cure. She refused to accept the syringe food on her last 2 days and she seemed to be giving up. She used to fight us when she was having dental problems whenever we feed her, but those last couple of days, she just won't accept anything more. We decided that the best thing to do for her was to end her suffering. I had to hold her when the vet was putting her to sleep. She was 5 yrs. old.

All our guinea pigs were burried in a big patch on our garden. We had to put a big rock on top of every grave to remind us where they are. Hubby never sheds tears when a relative dies, but he would always with guinea pigs that passed away. I would always cry for a few days when I mourn and looking at their photos and videos somehow help in my mourning. And the remaining guinea pigs we have is always a distraction. I would always end up kissing and hugging them more because of it. Sometimes, even up to this day, if I'm cutting the grass on the garden and I'm near their graves, I always tell them that I still miss them so much. I think if someone see or hear me during that time, they'd think I'm a cuckoo. But you can't help how they just became a part of your lives forever.

Here are my 3 piggies in Heaven. (Timmy, Deedee and Meemee)

 

[anyar.dris]

Oh I'll just add that I had all the past and present guinea pigs all in a personalised ornaments last Christmas. I'll have Prince's done as well for this year.

 

[Janey]

I've only lost 2 piggies, the first of which was Phoebe, the one in my avatar. She was my heart and soul pig and I knew she was very poorly. I'd been keeping a close eye on her and had only that evening decided that the time was right to have her put to sleep. I felt like she was telling me that somehow. I was upset as I made preparations to take her to the vet, only to come in to get her, and found she'd already died in her cage, with her head in the water bowl. Heartbroken doesn't describe adequately how I felt - full of guilt too, for not getting her to the vets in time, wondering if she suffered or was in pain in her final moments, and knowing I wasn't there holding her devastated me. I cried for days and buried her in my garden. She has a special bright yellow flower planted above her, as she was always my sunshine girl. I still miss her sometimes.

Poppy was Phoebe's cage mate - supposed sister, but was never 100% sure about that. They were so different too. Poppy lived on for another year after Phoebe died, on her own, as I swore I wouldn't have any more piggies as I was so heartbroken after Phoebe. Poppy seemed happy enough in herself though, but as time went on and she reached the age of 7 she went downhill fast, lost lots of weight, and just seemed to really slow down a lot. I was hovering, not really knowing what to do for the best. I didn't want to put her to sleep too soon but after a couple of days made the decision and took her. I just burst into tears in the waiting room of the vets, feeling terrible knowing what I was about to do - even though I knew it was for the best. It was dreadful. My vet was brilliant, and sedated her first before administering the final injection and I stayed with her the whole time, talking to her and stroking her little body. Still felt so guilty afterwards - what right did I have to make that decision to take away her life? I know it's the last act of love I could have shown her, but it's a tough call to make at any time, for any pet. I brought her home and buried her next to Phoebe.

I don't have any rituals as such, I do feel guilt and wonder if I could have done more sometimes, even though I know I always try my best. I cried for days after losing Poppy too and haven't ever written this down before now - although sitting here with tears streaming down my face. Now I have 5 more piggies because I couldn't stand the empty room, without any little faces appearing or wheeking noises. When anything happens to any of these, I'll probably have them cremated, as I don't have anywhere in the garden for them, I'm not sure whether I'll keep the remains or not yet. I'll cross that bridge when I get there.

 

[piggieminder]

I've had two losses that affected me deeply. The first was Spike (aged about 4), I'd only had him 2 weeks. Spike's owner was changing jobs and her new job was live in, she couldn't take her much loved piggys with her. I had left Spike and Bumble to settle in, not handled them much and I didn't realise Spike was ill. I guess the move had upset him and contributed to him having a URI. One morning he didn't come out of his bed for breakfast, I picked him up and realised something was wrong. I got a vet appointment for 10am, he had antibiotics. At 2pm I went to give him his next dose and he fitted and died in my arms. The guilt and what if's lived with me for a very long time, I blamed myself, I just wish I'd noticed he was ill sooner. Finding Bumble a friend and bonding them helped a little with the grief. We burried Spike in the garden, I don't even have a photo of him.
Last October 3rd we lost Willow. Willow was only 10 months old, during the 2 days before he was PTS he lost 50gms in weight. All 4 piggys were booked into the vets for a routine health check, 3 passed with flying colours but the vet was concerned about Willow and wanted to do some tests. It was 8pm so I signed a paper to say they could do any tests they felt necessary and left Willow with Bracken for company overnight so they could start testing straight away in the morning. I was worried about him but not overly, I thought he probably had an infection and would come home with pain killers and anti biotics, after all he'd been popcorning around the living room that afternoon. At 11am the vet called, Willow's CT scan showed his kidneys and urinary tract were full of stones, he was still sedated and she advised PTS before he came round. The shock was awful, I was home alone and couldn't take in what had happened. We burried Willow in a large pot in the garden which I had bought a few weeks before for a tree. I realised in January that I had been on auto pilot for 3 months with the other piggys, even bonding Rusty and Bracken had no enjoyment to it. I blamed myself for Willow's early death, it didn't mattter the vet saying how healthy and well looked after the boys were, Willow must have had a genetic problem. For a while I wanted to rehome the others I wasn't fit to look after them. With the realisation that I had been very depressed things improved I started loving the piggys again. My attitude to them has also changed. Willow may not have had a long life but he had a good one with us, a wonderful summer on the grass most days, which he loved. I can't guarantee my guinea pigs a long life, but I will give them the best life I possibly can.
Willow RIP

I wish the tree was a weeping willow, but I already had the acer and we burried him in the dark as soon as we got home.

 

[Merab]

I started keeping piggies again about 7 years ago when I fell in love with 2 red eyed white brothers in P@H adoption centre.
Philemon sadly died young - he’d been having fits and the vet diagnosed a brain tumour.
I wept buckets in the surgery as he was put to sleep.
His brother Titus was neutered and welcomed 2 sows as his companions. Tamar and her daughter Merab came from a breeder who didn’t want them any more. Tamar died unexpectedly- I noticed that she was tossing her head and had taken herself away from the others.
She had died before I got back from phoning the vet hospital who said to bring her straight in.
It was probably a heart attack or stroke. I just held her body for a while on my lap before taking her back to Titus and Merab so they could acknowledge her padding in their own way.
I don’t think she had had space or much exercise before I got her. She’d just been used for breeding.
Titus simply passed away in his sleep one night with Merab laying beside him.
I think if I had come across the forum sooner I might have picked up on illness sooner - I don’t know.
I don’t have any rituals for my departed piggies.
They are buried in the garden and I grieve for them.
They still have a special place in my heart and I believe that one day I will meet up with all my much loved and lost pets in heaven.
Merab continues to thrive at nearly 6 with her 2 three year old companions.

 

[sport_billy]

Hugs to you all and thanks for contributing to this thread.

Loss effects us all differently but I am sure that reading experiences will help others who are going through loss see that you do come through the other side. Our Rainbow Bridge section of the forum is such a sad place but one that offers people a place to remember and be supported.

The way you all support each other in our forum family is such an amazing strength and you always make me proud to be a member here

 

[Freela]

I've had three pigs pass away at home, two of those in my arms. With the first pig, there was an acute infection that we were attempting to treat but we knew there was a possibility she wouldn't make it. With the other two, they were both older ladies but rapidly and unexpectedly progressed from seemingly normal to passing away within a day's time, in spite of emergency vet visits to attempt to treat them. I will never forget holding them and feeling them take their last breaths and feeling their last heartbeat against my palm. It was gut-wrenching, but at the same time I felt reassured that they were not alone, that they were with someone they trusted, and that they passed in the arms of someone who loved them... I wish every animal were that fortunate. As far as remembering our pets that have passed, we have a shelf of pet photographs of pets that we have lost and we add a favorite picture to the shelf. They are certainly never forgotten, and though we are thankful to add other pets to the family, they are never replaced.

 

[Merab]

@Freela you are spot on when you say a pet is never replaced.
Someone who should have known better asked if my 2 baby girls were replacements for Titus.
I said ‘NO’ - they were his successors.
No pet can be replaced like a broken piece of crockery- each one is a unique being.

 

[RosieMaia]

Two deaths this far have affected me deeply.

The first was my very first piggy, Piggy. He came to me when I was 7 years old, when I started school, to keep me company after school, because I had to stay on my own for a few hours. Piggy was with me for 9 years, until I was 16, and I loved him dearly. He was my best friend, truly. He even got to meet my husband (he's my high school sweetheart).

At the very end, his health was failing noticeably, he seemed to be very uncomfortable, and the vets did little to help. My mother thought it was best to pts him, I insisted on fighting for him - I really wasn't ready to let go. I still feel guilt over my decision to not let him go sooner. I was very young, obviously, but he was my pig and my responsibility, so I should have made a decision that was in his best interest, not mine.

The other piggy death I wanted to tell you about was my piggy Alfie. He came to me with his brother from a (very!) irresponsible breeder. Both him and his brother had severe disabilities, and his brother passed away a few weeks after coming into our home. Alfie did survive, although he was in poor health often, and remained very tiny - ca. 600 grams. When he was four, he suddenly got better, gained some weight, started being more active, his constant teeth problems disappeared and he started being able to eat on his own. He really had never been happier and healthier. We went on vacation, and two days later, my mother told me she found him dead. I was truly devastated, because I didn't get a chance to say goodbye, and felt it was very unfair for him to suddenly die just when he was doing so well.

The fact that I wasn't able to say my goodbyes or see him one last time affected me very much. Piggies stopped being a part of my life for 5 years, I just couldn't face inviting one in my home and in my heart. I had persistent dreams about him, and I blamed myself that maybe there was a sign I failed to notice, that maybe he'd have survived, if I hadn't gone on a holiday. I had recurring nightmares that he was buried alive, because my mum hadn't noticed he was just sleeping and thought he was dead (obviously this wasn't the case, she adored the little mite), which was really very macabre and I would wake up feeling terrible. At the time, I really believed I'd never ever have a guinea pig again.

5 years later, I met Rosie, fell in love and the rest is history. But I still miss all of my rainbow pigs.

 

[pig in the city]

As a volunteer for a guinea pig rescue l have experienced numerous piggy deaths. It doesn't get any easier and as others have mentioned some piggies touch a nerve more than others.
The losses l find hardest are the ones where the piggy never stood a chance. For example, cases of extreme neglect, and stillborn babies to a malnourished mum.
Also when something went wrong with planned veterinary treatment. A piggy who was neutered who developed severe abscesses that burst internally. A piggy who had a bladder stone removed and died post operatively. And of course the ones that need to be put to sleep. They are the saddest ones of all.
These are all the ones that hurt the most.
But when an elderly piggy dies peacefully in the night, it doesn't really hurt at all. I feel sad that they have gone but happy that they had a good life and a good death.
It is what l hope for all my animals and for all my human family and friends too!