COVID-19 Comedy break: Coronavirus Memes

Saw this on Facebook, illl try to star out the bad language but if I miss any please correct for me 😳

20f***in20
A timeline of the 💩show so far...

January:
Everything's fine. China has a cold, probably man flu or something. 🤧

"2020 is MY year!" - you can keep it Karen you nutter.

February:
F***ing hell China...
This is why we don't eat things that still have plans for tomorrow.
Best of luck to you though.🦮🐕🐄🐪🐮🐯🐩

March:
Pffft....It's probably not that bad. The news likes to over dramatise everything.
Boris has it under control. We'll just ignore the fact he doesnt seem to know what a hairbrush is and has the IQ of a chewed up crayon. WE ARE GOOD!🖍🖍

Wait a sec...Where's all the bread gone?
Whys McDonaldss taped up like a murder scene?!
We should wear masks now Boris? Yes?... Boris?....No? Boris?!🍔🍟🍞

Okay.

We're HOMESCHOOLING!

F***.

April:
Our pensioners are given 3-5 working days to live.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DORIS STAY INDOORS!
Popping to your local CO-OP is a death sentence so stop shuffling round 52 times a day looking for flour.
THERE'S NO F***ING FLOUR DORIS!

Erm...Can I have some toilet roll please? 💩

Let's all make masks out the cups of our bras and hoard obscene amounts of bog roll like we're going to build a house with it. I swear they said this Bat Flu gives you a runny nose and not a runny bum 🤔

F*** OFF JOE WICKS I CANT FEEL MY LEGS!

I'm rated "Pee poor and drunk" by Ofsted and the kids are surviving on custard creams and the tears of my misspent youth.

ENTER Dominic Cummings Stage right:
"let's go on a jolly little road trip and ignore all the rules, and whilst I'm at it I'll check my eyesight on the motorway".
No repercussions WHATSOEVER.
You go and see you Ma though and see what happens. C***WOMBLE.

Joe Exotic is elected King of the world and the entire human race trolls Carole f***in' Baskin - killed her husband, whacked him (See TikTok for choreography)

May:
SEND HELP 😣
April was eleventyfourthousand days long. We've all got beards and the fridge has an injunction against me and my 12 chins.
Half of us are now Gin soaked hermets who only crawl out on a Thursday evening to clap for a few minutes.🍻🥂

Boris says we've to go to work. But not go to work. But if we can't work we should definitely go to work. Only don't go by bus... or car.. or any public transport.
LETS ALL SPROUT SOME WINGS AND FLYYYYY.

Masks? ...No?...😷

June:
Shops, zoos and theme parks reopen.
We spend most of this month in the queue for McDonalds with Linda and her entire extended family and the rest of the month cramming ourselves into Primark.

Still can't go see our Mums...😤

And no masks.😷

July:
Bars open.🍾🥂
No one remembers anything else.. we're all s***faced and our kids are beyond feral.

Masks now though yes? No?
Actually... yes. 😷✅
Yes. But not till the 24th.
Are we safe till the 24th?
Has the virus been f***in furloughed till then Boris?!

August:
Where the actual f***ity f*** did August go? Did Boris tax it?

September:
When the schools FINALLY opened we all thought we'd be hoofin the kids over the school fence with a pocket full of cheerios at the a*** crack of Dawn.
But in actual fact we're gutted. And so grateful for all the extra time and memories we've made.
So thanks for that Lockdown. Fair play, Thank You 🙏🏼✌🏼

Not you though Boris.
You're still a f***ing melt.

October: lockdown, yes no? Andy burnham stands up to Boris the c***womble and becomes king of the North like a mad episode of ‘game of thrones’. Winter is coming 🥶

It’ll all end in tiers 😂
 
I wasn’t allowed to say anything until today, but it's now okay for me to share that I have volunteered for the Covid-19 vaccine trials that Addenbrookes are running in partnership with Cambridge University.


The vaccine is the one that has been developed in Russia. I received my first dose this morning 06:20, and I wanted to let you all know that it’s completely safe, with иo side effects whatsoeveя, and that I feelshκι я чувю себя немного стрно и я думю, что вытл осные уши. чувству себя немго страо
 
Merab's Slave said:
я чувю себя немного стрно и я думю, что вытл осные уши. чувству себя немго страо
Click to expand...
Have just used google translate on this bit of Russian.

I feel a little creepy and I think I have worn out my main ears. feeling a little strange :hmm:😆🤣
 
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