Feel Sad And Alone

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sweetdove

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I'm starting to feel alone and undate able. I joined a dating site but came of today coz all I get are pervs or 25 year old boys message me. (((((Sighsssssss))))))) I know I have all my family and freinds around and all my animal babies but its not the same as someone to cuddle and share thoughts with. I think I'll be alone forever as I dont go out and I not going through dating sites again. Time is passing by and I'm being left behind. Oops sorry to carry on just feeling sorry for myself.
 
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piggyfan

It can be very lonely being single. From what I have learned the free dating sites are not as good as a lot of the people on it are not serious. I have heard good things about eharmony as they use a very detailed questionnaire compiled by a physiologist to match up people. It may be worth having a try?

I am sorry you are feeling this way. It is great you have family and friends around you.
 

AbiS

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Ahh honey, I know how lonely life can be and it is so difficult to find something to say that doesn't just sound like an empty platitude. I do know lots of people who have had success on dating sites but it does take time to find the right person - as you say there are a load of pervs and inappropriate folk on there that you have to sift through. Have you tried moving onto a different site like one of the ones that you have to pay for? Think you get people who take things more seriously than the free ones on there. It is just so difficult to meet people these days.
 

Chief Guinea Pig

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Aw, I am sorry you are feeling like this. Hugs. The right person will take time to come along!
 

LisaAli

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We agree with @piggyfan free dating sites are a waste of time, it was only when I joined a fee paying site we / I met each other. That was over 8 years ago and Ali at that time was 47, so it does work if you find the right site.

Lisa & Ali.. x
 

sweetdove

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Ahh honey, I know how lonely life can be and it is so difficult to find something to say that doesn't just sound like an empty platitude. I do know lots of people who have had success on dating sites but it does take time to find the right person - as you say there are a load of pervs and inappropriate folk on there that you have to sift through. Have you tried moving onto a different site like one of the ones that you have to pay for? Think you get people who take things more seriously than the free ones on there. It is just so difficult to meet people these days.
I have been on match. Com £75 and all people in my area hadnt been on in months so I rang them
Up and ask for my money back not going back to a paid one. I'll just have to concentrate on my boys
 

furry critters

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So sorry you're feeling sad,I was alone for a few years after an abusive relationship,I didn't want anyone else,so I thought. A friend said I should put an as in my local paper in the lonely hearts column,I thought about it for weeks then took the plunge,I met a wonderful man and 11 years later we are happy and married. He has since adopted all 4 of my children. Don't give up there is someone out there for everyone.x
 

Flutterby

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I'm sorry you are feeling down, it's never nice going through a stage like that. I met my husband through a dating site called Girls Date for Free. It's rubbish and I went on it when i was young and stupid, but thankfully it was the best thing I ever did as I met Duncan. Please don't give up, they aren't all bad! I second eharmony! Other than that all I can offer is hugs! *hugs*
 

sweetdove

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I'm sorry you are feeling down, it's never nice going through a stage like that. I met my husband through a dating site called Girls Date for Free. It's rubbish and I went on it when i was young and stupid, but thankfully it was the best thing I ever did as I met Duncan. Please don't give up, they aren't all bad! I second eharmony! Other than that all I can offer is hugs! *hugs*
I'm just going to live my life and who knows I might meet mister right over the frozen chickens in sainsbury lol I just get these lul moods now and then. I'm fine when I'm busy so I better start making more cards that take my mind of things. Thanks for listening to my rant, gets it out my system.
 

Jennifer D

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I often feel somewhat similar, though I don't want a relationship. I feel like there is a stigma that all women must marry and have children, but I truly am happier on my own. But sometimes I wonder what my whole purpose is, if that makes any sense at all. I can't afford to live on my own, and I can't seem to get a job that would allow me to do so. All my friends are always wondering why I can't rent, but they are all in relationships (many of them don't have any better jobs then I do) and have a second source of income. I don't like the idea of relying on another person for the things I need and I don't like the idea of having to be in constant communication with a significant other. I'm not gay or bisexual, I find men attractive for sure and I hold no judgement for any sexual orientation, but for some reason, I just don't need it like other people do. It's so weird and hard to explain. But realizing all that, at the same time I know I am not fully happy, and I can't figure out what I need to "fill the void" so to speak. I keep busy with my animals, I don't do well when I'm not busy and have some poor tendencies that I fall into. Don't give up on finding someone if that is what you want though- they could be waiting for you somewhere that you never expected.
 

Goth Mummy

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I'm so sorry that you are feeling down. I dont know how old you are but several of my friends who are mid-30s have met nice long term partners through the Guardian newspaper online dating and eharmony.

It can be very hard for people to meet once they have left college/university and once you are past the night clubs stage.
 

BossHogg

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I was on my own at 29, I'd had one or two casual relationships but nothing serious. Then my dad had a heart attack whilst him and my mum were visiting friends in Cumbria. I went to visit him in hospital, as I walked into the friends house, her younger sister was in having a cuppa, we hit it off straight away, we've been together 19 years this year. ;)
 

MrsSuzy

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Maybe join local groups to you with a shared interest? If you enjoy walking, for example, join a walking club. It takes your mind of dating, you meet people that like doing what you like and who knows?

I say this because before I met Rob I frequently felt lonely and also joined a few sites which didn't work for me. I got to the stage where I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and decided to find a hobby that I loved. I invested on a good camera and lenses and join a London meetup photography group where we would go round and take photos of stuff, etc. I met Rob and a year later we started dating :)

Have a look at meetup.com website for local groups in your area. You might find some that do something you love.
 

Wiebke

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I didn't meet my hub on holiday until I was over thirty and didn't get married until I was getting closer to forty (and had become very good friends in the meantime), but it was definitely worth the loooong wait! It was very depressing and frustrating at times, especially as I usually ended up/was paired up with males that needed a mama and not a partner to sort them out at any party...

Believe me, it is better to not settle for just anybody for the sake of not being single and rather concentrate on having a social life with friends. So many of those friends of mine who have compromised are either divorced, separated or sticking it out for the sake of their children. You are more likely to find someone you like at work, on holiday or through your friends. You can also consider joining a club; a shared hobby or interest can be a very good base for a long term partnership!
 

Lady Kelly

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Have you tried looking on social sites like citysocializer or meetups? People set up groups on there to build social circles of common interests... my local one has book clubs, knitting clubs, reading clubs, gig buddies etc. I agree with what's said as above, I joined eHarmony on one of their free weekends and it is a bloody essay to get on but so worth it. I met my OH on there and he isn't the usual type I would have gone for (but then my exes had all been tall, dark, lying, cheating A*****les!) and we have been together for 3.5 years now. I only joined to see what the dating market was like and had planned not to get into a serious relationship until the new year but by october he was referring to me as his girlfriend so that kind of happened! :))
 

natz88

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Being single is lonely but it can sometimes have it up sides. I tried the free dating sites and found I had the same problem as you. Been on match.com and they aren't as bad on there but still no luck for me. Things will look up for you soon though :)
 

Wigwig

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Awww :hug:I find that meeting people via something your interested in is better. Like in the past, I dated people I met on forums. I like this way because you can see what sort of person they are, how they act around others etc, before even having to make any sort of contact, and you can become friends first rather than straight up launching into dating. Also there are creeps everywhere online, but I think it is worse on dating sites because people assume everyone on there is wanting sex, at least on forums there are rules and a community. For example, if you met somebody on here, I really doubt they would message pervy stuff (at least, not straight away) and the rules and moderation here make it very easy to ban a person like that.
 

natz88

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Awww :hug:I find that meeting people via something your interested in is better. Like in the past, I dated people I met on forums. I like this way because you can see what sort of person they are, how they act around others etc, before even having to make any sort of contact, and you can become friends first rather than straight up launching into dating. Also there are creeps everywhere online, but I think it is worse on dating sites because people assume everyone on there is wanting sex, at least on forums there are rules and a community. For example, if you met somebody on here, I really doubt they would message pervy stuff (at least, not straight away) and the rules and moderation here make it very easy to ban a person like that.
Well said :)
 

flintstones

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I agree with the comments re-hobby or meet up group this way you expand your social circle and make some great friends. You may not meet a partner but you'll definitely meet some great people, that you enjoy spending time with.

As the cliché goes, the right person always appears when you least expect them.
 
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