Feeling like I should have realised :(

[Kylie80]

Are there other guinea pig owners that blame themselves when their guinea pigs pass suddenly?

I'm really blaming myself for not noticing Coco had that tumour in her stomach and the vet said it was quite big but she had always had a really fat bulbous tummy since she was a baby and vets were always asking me if she had ever had pups (which she hadn't as she was only 6 weeks old when we got her), they always spend a lot of time feeling around her tummy for this reason and they had felt nothing 5 month ago when she had her 6 monthly vet check. I noticed recently that she had gained a fair bit of weight but so had Patchy and that there was quite a few foods that were suddenly not being liked anymore but I thought they were bored with their diet but Patchy is now eating those foods again with gusto (she's fully enjoying not having to share her food).I had her out for lap time and health checks but still never noticed or felt it, not that I would have known what I was feeling for anyway. I just feel like there is more I should have done for her

*An update on Patchy, she is soldiering on even doing popcorns and zoomies and playing with me and eating up a storm, she sniffs around looking for Coco sometimes but then heads back to the hay bowl. I am keeping a close eye on her but she got a clean bill of health at the vets when they checked her and impressed the nurses with the "full range of movement" she has, apparently she was very wriggly and naughty. I did try to warn them.

 

[Wiebke]

Are there other guinea pig owners that blame themselves when their guinea pigs pass suddenly?

I'm really blaming myself for not noticing Coco had that tumour in her stomach and the vet said it was quite big but she had always had a really fat bulbous tummy since she was a baby and vets were always asking me if she had ever had pups (which she hadn't as she was only 6 weeks old when we got her), they always spend a lot of time feeling around her tummy for this reason and they had felt nothing 5 month ago when she had her 6 monthly vet check. I noticed recently that she had gained a fair bit of weight but so had Patchy and that there was quite a few foods that were suddenly not being liked anymore but I thought they were bored with their diet but Patchy is now eating those foods again with gusto (she's fully enjoying not having to share her food).I had her out for lap time and health checks but still never noticed or felt it, not that I would have known what I was feeling for anyway. I just feel like there is more I should have done for her

*An update on Patchy, she is soldiering on even doing popcorns and zoomies and playing with me and eating up a storm, she sniffs around looking for Coco sometimes but then heads back to the hay bowl. I am keeping a close eye on her but she got a clean bill of health at the vets when they checked her and impressed the nurses with the "full range of movement" she has, apparently she was very wriggly and naughty. I did try to warn them.

Hi!

I am ever so sorry for your loss!

We humans are unfortunately wired to always seek the fault with ourselves. feelings of guilt or failure are typical for the onset of the grieving process; they are more intense after a sudden, unexpected death. But they are in essence just an expression of your strong feelings of responsibility and love. You wouldn't have them if you didn't care.

And no, neither your vet nor you have missed anything. Internal growths are pretty impossible to notice until they cause symptoms. If it was an internal abscess, it would have come up and burst in literally a matter of days.

As tumours are not contagious, you do not have to fear that there is anything or the same thing medically wrong with Patches; but it is not an uncommon reaction when you feel somewhat traumatised.

Please take the time to read these two guides. You will hopefully find them helpful in the coming days and weeks to make sense of and to process what has happened.
Human Bereavement: Grieving, Coping and Support Links for Guinea Pig Owners and Their Children
Looking After a Bereaved Guinea Pig

 

[Black piggies]

Are there other guinea pig owners that blame themselves when their guinea pigs pass suddenly?

I'm really blaming myself for not noticing Coco had that tumour in her stomach and the vet said it was quite big but she had always had a really fat bulbous tummy since she was a baby and vets were always asking me if she had ever had pups (which she hadn't as she was only 6 weeks old when we got her), they always spend a lot of time feeling around her tummy for this reason and they had felt nothing 5 month ago when she had her 6 monthly vet check. I noticed recently that she had gained a fair bit of weight but so had Patchy and that there was quite a few foods that were suddenly not being liked anymore but I thought they were bored with their diet but Patchy is now eating those foods again with gusto (she's fully enjoying not having to share her food).I had her out for lap time and health checks but still never noticed or felt it, not that I would have known what I was feeling for anyway. I just feel like there is more I should have done for her

*An update on Patchy, she is soldiering on even doing popcorns and zoomies and playing with me and eating up a storm, she sniffs around looking for Coco sometimes but then heads back to the hay bowl. I am keeping a close eye on her but she got a clean bill of health at the vets when they checked her and impressed the nurses with the "full range of movement" she has, apparently she was very wriggly and naughty. I did try to warn them.

I'm sorry you're going through this with your loss of Coco. Patchy seems in good form.
I had to put my boar to sleep last month after 10 horrible days of illness and treatment. It was totally unexpected for him to go at this age, and I've probably said sorry to him every day since. I agree, it is really tough! I feel I promised him a good life and I didn't keep my promise. I guess time will make it easier. That or adopting a ton more guinea pigs

 

[Sweet Potato]

Sorry for your loss. Guinea pigs are programmed to hide their illnesses as well as possible for as long as possible so their is likely nothing you could have noticed. It sounds like he wasn't suffering so you don't need to be so hard on yourself, but I know it's never easy.

 

[Kylie80]

I’m

I'm sorry you're going through this with your loss of Coco. Patchy seems in good form.
I had to put my boar to sleep last month after 10 horrible days of illness and treatment. It was totally unexpected for him to go at this age, and I've probably said sorry to him every day since. I agree, it is really tough! I feel I promised him a good life and I didn't keep my promise. I guess time will make it easier. That or adopting a ton more guinea pigs

I am sorry for your loss

 

[VickiA]

Your feelings are totally natural and resonate completely with many of us. I still have no idea what happened to my lovely Sylvia in 2018. She became ill and deteriorated within a matter of hours in one day and had to be PTS that same day. I have learned to live with her sudden loss but I still wonder what it missed. The answer is probably nothing. Piggies are programmed to hide their problems and illnesses ass they are prey animals. Even the vets can’t always spot the problems they are hiding. You gave Coco a great life, with love , companionship and vet treatment when needed. Please be gentle on yourself.

 

[Wiebke]

If it is any help to you, I have lost several piggies over the years where all I could do was to race them to the vets for pts as soon as noticed or where they simply went down like a lead balloon right out of the blue and I still haven't got the faintest idea what was wrong (and neither could the vet) - and I know that I am not an unobservant owner!

When you are a longer term owner you sooner or later come up against deaths you will never know, sometimes not even after a post mortem examination if you feel that this could help you find the answers you crave. You have to somehow make peace with the not knowing.

Please take the time to read the grieving guide. It is touching on this point as well.

 

[piggieminder]

I know exactly how you feel. I hope one day very soon you will be able to look back on Coco's life with a smile and remember the good times. Sending you and Patchy hugs. X

 

[Flutterby]

Every single time, it's so hard I'm so sorry for your loss xx