Jamie619916
Junior Guinea Pig
Hi
Hate the fact this will be my 1st post on a forum but reading from this forum has helped me in the past so just wanted to go out my feelings out there. Any words of advice on how I can cope with this guilt would be greatly appreciated as I’m really struggling.
Last week on Thursday 9th November, I noticed that my 5year old little boy, Severus, was not eating his usual veg and would lay down a lot more frequently instead of him being his active self. Instantly I started him on recovery food and syringe feeding him water and veg.
Things started to look up as his weight increased and he started to eat on his own a little bit but to be sure we continued to syringe feed him and also syringe water as well. However on Monday 13th November he was very lethargic and would not take as much syringe feeding as before and even stopped eating for himself.
We rushed him to the vets at around 4:30pm. The vets were very friendly and took care of Severus very gently. Did some examinations and said that his heart sounded healthy and his breathing was good but could see something wrong with his gut. While being examined, Severus was very active and moved around the table a lot.
The vet gave me a couple of options.
Give him some pain meds and a gut movement drug and see how he goes.
Do some X-rays and images to see if anything shows up
Or put him to sleep
I strongly believed Severus had a lot left to give and could get over this as there were moments where he would be his normal vocal and active self.
I made the choice to try the drugs and get another visit booked tomorrow to see how he handles it.
When the vet injected Severus with the pain meds and gut movement drugs, he let out a very loud noise which was very hard to hear.
I took him home and put him in his hammock so he could calm down from the vet. Sev didn’t move at all during the rest of the day which really got me worried. I syringe fed him some water which he did take some in but since coming from the vet he started to become worse. I placed him in his favourite spot in his cage and turned the lights and tv off to have a calm environment for him.
I went to bed that night but could hardly get any sleep. I woke up about 5am and rushed into the front room to check up on him.
Severus had managed to pull him self across the cage and was laying flat with his head up against the cage wall. His breathing was extremely wheezy and it was the worst way I’ve ever seen a Guinea pig lay down.
I instantly pick up him up and laid him on my chest and wrapped my dressing gown around him as he was very cold. He instantly melted down into my chest and every breath he took was made with a wheezing noise. I knew this was the end of his life and I wanted to make it comfortable for him as much as possible. I kept him wrapped up, spoke to him, told him how much I love him and stroked his head.
My vets open at 8am so I stayed laid with him making him as comfortable as possible for him knowing I have to take him to the vet so he can cross the rainbow bridge.
The next part is the most heartbreaking and traumatic experience I’ve ever witnessed with a Guinea pig. At 7am his breathing got slower and slower and then every time he took a couple breaths he would try to swallow and lift his head every time. He then suddenly begun to move like he was running and then stopped. He then tried to take in 2 gasps of air and after that he went over that rainbow bridge. It was so heartbreaking to witness all this and feel absolutely helpless for him.
I stayed with him for another hour as I couldn’t bring myself to part from him as I cried so much.
I can’t help but think that I made him suffer during the night unnecessarily and the pain he must of been in during his last few hours before he passed due to my decision at the vets. I absolutely hate myself for it cause I didn’t want to cause him any pain at all. I just hope he knows I was there in the last couple of hours with him and knows how much I loved him.
I miss him dearly. He was such a massive part of my morning, afternoon and night. I spoiled him rotten and he knew it but it all was worth it because of how much happiness he brought to me.
I know feeling guilt is part of the grieving processes but the amount of guilt I’m feeling due my decision at the vets and causing him so much suffering in the end is just too much and every time I remember this morning it gets worse.
Sorry for the long thread but this site has helped me so much in the past and was looking for advice (if any)
Thank you for your time
Hate the fact this will be my 1st post on a forum but reading from this forum has helped me in the past so just wanted to go out my feelings out there. Any words of advice on how I can cope with this guilt would be greatly appreciated as I’m really struggling.
Last week on Thursday 9th November, I noticed that my 5year old little boy, Severus, was not eating his usual veg and would lay down a lot more frequently instead of him being his active self. Instantly I started him on recovery food and syringe feeding him water and veg.
Things started to look up as his weight increased and he started to eat on his own a little bit but to be sure we continued to syringe feed him and also syringe water as well. However on Monday 13th November he was very lethargic and would not take as much syringe feeding as before and even stopped eating for himself.
We rushed him to the vets at around 4:30pm. The vets were very friendly and took care of Severus very gently. Did some examinations and said that his heart sounded healthy and his breathing was good but could see something wrong with his gut. While being examined, Severus was very active and moved around the table a lot.
The vet gave me a couple of options.
Give him some pain meds and a gut movement drug and see how he goes.
Do some X-rays and images to see if anything shows up
Or put him to sleep
I strongly believed Severus had a lot left to give and could get over this as there were moments where he would be his normal vocal and active self.
I made the choice to try the drugs and get another visit booked tomorrow to see how he handles it.
When the vet injected Severus with the pain meds and gut movement drugs, he let out a very loud noise which was very hard to hear.
I took him home and put him in his hammock so he could calm down from the vet. Sev didn’t move at all during the rest of the day which really got me worried. I syringe fed him some water which he did take some in but since coming from the vet he started to become worse. I placed him in his favourite spot in his cage and turned the lights and tv off to have a calm environment for him.
I went to bed that night but could hardly get any sleep. I woke up about 5am and rushed into the front room to check up on him.
Severus had managed to pull him self across the cage and was laying flat with his head up against the cage wall. His breathing was extremely wheezy and it was the worst way I’ve ever seen a Guinea pig lay down.
I instantly pick up him up and laid him on my chest and wrapped my dressing gown around him as he was very cold. He instantly melted down into my chest and every breath he took was made with a wheezing noise. I knew this was the end of his life and I wanted to make it comfortable for him as much as possible. I kept him wrapped up, spoke to him, told him how much I love him and stroked his head.
My vets open at 8am so I stayed laid with him making him as comfortable as possible for him knowing I have to take him to the vet so he can cross the rainbow bridge.
The next part is the most heartbreaking and traumatic experience I’ve ever witnessed with a Guinea pig. At 7am his breathing got slower and slower and then every time he took a couple breaths he would try to swallow and lift his head every time. He then suddenly begun to move like he was running and then stopped. He then tried to take in 2 gasps of air and after that he went over that rainbow bridge. It was so heartbreaking to witness all this and feel absolutely helpless for him.
I stayed with him for another hour as I couldn’t bring myself to part from him as I cried so much.
I can’t help but think that I made him suffer during the night unnecessarily and the pain he must of been in during his last few hours before he passed due to my decision at the vets. I absolutely hate myself for it cause I didn’t want to cause him any pain at all. I just hope he knows I was there in the last couple of hours with him and knows how much I loved him.
I miss him dearly. He was such a massive part of my morning, afternoon and night. I spoiled him rotten and he knew it but it all was worth it because of how much happiness he brought to me.
I know feeling guilt is part of the grieving processes but the amount of guilt I’m feeling due my decision at the vets and causing him so much suffering in the end is just too much and every time I remember this morning it gets worse.
Sorry for the long thread but this site has helped me so much in the past and was looking for advice (if any)
Thank you for your time
Guilt is part of the grieving process but please don’t feel guilty, you did all you could Severus knew how much you loved you x