GPU help needed

LondonLady

LondonLady

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Dear Miss Bramble (c/o @Betsy )

I haven’t been round here very long but I’ve heard all about you and how you stick up for us piggies who aren’t been treated right by our slaves so I hope you can help with my problem.

I’ve been in my new home for a month now and on the whole things are going well. I’m getting on very well with Toffee, there is plenty of hay and the cage is nice and comfortable. The problem comes at evening veggie time. Now I’m rather particular about my veggies and so it came as a bit of a shock to find that I’m being offered pepper (red or yellow) every evening. I can’t stand pepper! And I’ve made this perfectly clear to the slave but she takes no notice. She keeps saying silyl things like: ‘Just try it, it’s very nice’ and ‘I thought ALL piggies liked pepper’. She just can’t seem to learn. We sometimes get celery, which I eat if there’s nothing else on offer and I’ve also been offered a green bean – ugh!

I thought things were looking up when one day she brought me a delicious Brussels sprout and another day a piece of carrot! But, would you believe it, she then had the nerve to say these were just special treats and I can’t have them every day!

So please can you help me make the slave give me the veggies that I like?

(Incidentally breakfast time is all right because we always have yummy coriander lettuce and cucumber for breakfast. I only eat the skin of cucumber (as I said I’m rather particular) but that’s all right because Toffee always hoovers up the rest.)

Hoping you can help and thanking you in advance for your advice,

Spice
 
Dear Spice,
You can send the green beans to us, they are very yummy. We like to eat the skin of the cucumber first too but Brussels sprouts are yucky. Has your slave given you any mint, dill or basil to try? Or pea flakes? We highly recommend all of those.
We think you and Toffee are very pretty.
Yours with kisses,
Dignified Sir George and Mischievous Master Boris ❤️
 
Dear Spice,

My slave yesterday had the audacity to try feed me mint! MINT! make sure you let them know of your eternal disappointment by giving them a very judgemental stare so they know of your disappointment, practice 3 times a day for the perfect execution. Yours lovingly Gino

Dear Spice,

FOOD? FOOD? PEPPERS? GREEN BEANS? NOM!

Yours with much love, Fred. P.S send me your leftovers I am FAMISHED
 
Dear Spice, and other fellow piggies, especially Gino,
Please can you send any extra food this way, I have some very noisy neighbours, who gobble everything.
Any mint going spare? I would love it, its my absolute favourite.
Wheeks.
Hamish.
 
LondonLady said:
Dear Miss Bramble (c/o @Betsy )

I haven’t been round here very long but I’ve heard all about you and how you stick up for us piggies who aren’t been treated right by our slaves so I hope you can help with my problem.

I’ve been in my new home for a month now and on the whole things are going well. I’m getting on very well with Toffee, there is plenty of hay and the cage is nice and comfortable. The problem comes at evening veggie time. Now I’m rather particular about my veggies and so it came as a bit of a shock to find that I’m being offered pepper (red or yellow) every evening. I can’t stand pepper! And I’ve made this perfectly clear to the slave but she takes no notice. She keeps saying silyl things like: ‘Just try it, it’s very nice’ and ‘I thought ALL piggies liked pepper’. She just can’t seem to learn. We sometimes get celery, which I eat if there’s nothing else on offer and I’ve also been offered a green bean – ugh!

I thought things were looking up when one day she brought me a delicious Brussels sprout and another day a piece of carrot! But, would you believe it, she then had the nerve to say these were just special treats and I can’t have them every day!

So please can you help me make the slave give me the veggies that I like?

(Incidentally breakfast time is all right because we always have yummy coriander lettuce and cucumber for breakfast. I only eat the skin of cucumber (as I said I’m rather particular) but that’s all right because Toffee always hoovers up the rest.)

Hoping you can help and thanking you in advance for your advice,

Spice
Click to expand...
Dear Spice

I'm sorry to learn that your Slave doesn't take your very obvious hint about you not liking pepper. Not all piggies are the same or like the same food. Why does your stupid Slave think that they do? Personally, I love all the veggies that my Slave gives me which are mainly pepper, cucumber, lettuce and aubergine. I get coriander every day too after I my morning groom (which I hate but I have to endure otherwise my fur gets all tangled) for being a good girl and letting my Slave put me through the trauma of it every day.

Right, how to make your Slave give you the veggies you like. The refusing to eat technique which I would recommend you try clearly hasn't worked so now you are going to have to try Plan B. Plan B entails The Judgemental Stare as practiced by Gino above, this would be my next suggestion as it clearly works well. Then you can run off as soon as the veggies you don't like appear in your cage. Take up wheaking at the top of your lungs to let your Slave know you are unhappy that the veggies you adore are not forthcoming. (Have you tried aubergine? I love it, it took a bit of getting used to as it has an unusual taste but now it is very nice.) Another suggestion is that you take up bar biting to get want you want. Slaves love the sound it makes as they find it very comforting and reassuring. Ignore your Slave when she tells you to stop bar biting as the noise is very annoying. She doesn't mean it.

I hope my advice and those of others will help you in your quest for yummy veg.

Your friend in a crisis

Miss Bramble
Shop Steward
 
Dear Miss Bramble,

Thank you for your reply. Yes I've been wondering if bar biting might be the way to go. In fact Toffee has been trying to teach me but I haven't been able to learn yet. He's very good at it and does it every mealtime. The Slave is always telling him to stop but of course he doesn't take any notice.

As it happens the slave has just come back from a shopping trip and has told us that she's got something different for me to try tonight. I don't think it's aubergine. Toffee thinks it might be basil which is his favourite. I'll wait and see how things go.
Many thanks, Spice
 
Dear fellow piggies,

Thank you all for your advice and support. It's very reassuring to know that there are other piggies out there who understand what I'm going through.
I would love to send some of you my unwanted veggies but Toffee would have something to say about that, he finishes up anything I don't want. (I think the Slave is worried that he will get too fat :lol: )
 
fluffysal said:
Dear Spice,
You can send the green beans to us, they are very yummy. We like to eat the skin of the cucumber first too but Brussels sprouts are yucky. Has your slave given you any mint, dill or basil to try? Or pea flakes? We highly recommend all of those.
We think you and Toffee are very pretty.
Yours with kisses,
Dignified Sir George and Mischievous Master Boris ❤️
Click to expand...
Dear Spice and Toffee,
Apologies, we mistakenly thought you were lady piggies!
Rumble, rumble, rumble
Dignified Sir George and Mischievous Master Boris.
 
Dear Spice
Don’t worry - you’ll eventually get the hang of bar biting. It took me (Bertie) 4 years and a new companion (Hutchie bar biter extraordinaire) to realise the immense benefits a good bar rattle can have. Hope you enjoyed the basil - we do like a bit of basil now and then.
Love Bertie and Hutchie 🥰
 
fluffysal said:
Dear Spice and Toffee,
Apologies, we mistakenly thought you were lady piggies!
Rumble, rumble, rumble
Dignified Sir George and Mischievous Master Boris.
Click to expand...
Dear Dignified Sir George and Mischievous Master Boris,

Spice has just drawn my attention to this, and I have to say I'm quite shocked that I could be mistaken for a lady piggy! While Spice is a lady (and a very attractive one too I might say :love:) I (Toffee) am most definitely a gentleman piggy. However, I realise it's not always easy to tell from a photo so I accept your apology :lol:

Incidentally the photo above shows me with my late friend Biscuit who sadly crossed the rainbow bridge in December.
Here's one of me and Spice enjoying our breakfast lettuce.

Toffee x

20240128_084047.webp
 
Dear Toffee,
Spice is indeed a very attractive lady piggy, you are lucky to be allowed to live with her. We have not had any female company since we were tiny pups.
Master Boris also has a problem with being mistaken for a lady piggy due to his glorious blonde locks!
Here are some nice pictures of us, I look very handsome and dignified don't I?
Rumble, rumble, rumble,
Dignified Sir George IMG20231124005708.webpIMG_20231030_204612.webp
 
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