GPU rep - can you help?

[Sue and Smartie]

Dear friends at the Guinea Pig Union,
I feel I am being treated most unfairly and would like to know what steps I can take to make things better.
Two weeks ago my human gave me the worst haircut in the history of haircuts and today she made me have a bath! She said I was a bit smelly and she didn't want me attracting flies - the cheek of it! I do have magnificent long hair (even after my haircut) and I can't help it if it trails in my wee can I?
I can see I WAS a bit grubby but the totally unfair part is that Kanga didn't have to have a bath OR a haircut, she just got told, you are a nice clean piggy.
I have already tried extreme wriggling, and biting. Is there anything else I can do to redress the balance?
Many thanks,
Fifi Fluffybottom

 

[Merab]

Dear Fifi Fluffybottom,
The One and Only Thea is on a well deserved holiday at the moment but I am sure she will respond when she returns.
If you need more immediate advice you may like to contact Tessy at GPFANS whose slave is @Viennese Furbabies
As one who had to endure a trimming of my beautiful flowing locks I feel your pain.
You can read my complaint in the thread.
I am not Amused.

Love from Priscilla

 

[Viennese Furbabies]

Dear Fifi Fluffybottom,
nipping hard and looking cute and innocent at the same time is always a good idea.
But we don't have any hands on experience with the ordeal of having your fur mutilated because we are all short haired at GPFANS headquarters.

Wheeks from Tessy

 

[Princess Dustmop]

I, too, understand the plight of the haircutting ... I have not had to endure a bath, but I have had trimmings and combings and more combings. Last time the human trimmed my fur, it took her two sittings, so I had a very strange do for day or so. I don't think she did it right either, as I think it made the ends tangle more because she made it too blunt.
I find squiggling doesn't really help; it just makes the combing go on for longer and results in the human holding me in different positions that make it harder for me to scramble ... nothing uncomfortable, just no leverage! Continuing to squirm results in the second human becoming involved. I did try a nip this evening as my bladder was getting rather full (hadn't tried that before); the human barely reacted at all and continued combing, though she does wear a sweatshirt when combing me to protect her arms from my nails. I'm not sure it was worth it. She did set me down before I piddled (though I did leave a poo, which she unceremoniously picked up and tossed into the waste bin next to her), but the combing resumed after clean up.
She kept looking at me nose to nose and telling me that I was making it more difficult, and it wasn't optional so please cooperate ... I can't help that I'm ticklish!

Best of Luck,
Lexa, Princess Dustmop

 

[Viennese Furbabies]

I, too, understand the plight of the haircutting ... I have not had to endure a bath, but I have had trimmings and combings and more combings. Last time the human trimmed my fur, it took her two sittings, so I had a very strange do for day or so. I don't think she did it right either, as I think it made the ends tangle more because she made it too blunt.
I find squiggling doesn't really help; it just makes the combing go on for longer and results in the human holding me in different positions that make it harder for me to scramble ... nothing uncomfortable, just no leverage! Continuing to squirm results in the second human becoming involved. I did try a nip this evening as my bladder was getting rather full (hadn't tried that before); the human barely reacted at all and continued combing, though she does wear a sweatshirt when combing me to protect her arms from my nails. I'm not sure it was worth it. She did set me down before I piddled (though I did leave a poo, which she unceremoniously picked up and tossed into the waste bin next to her), but the combing resumed after clean up.
She kept looking at me nose to nose and telling me that I was making it more difficult, and it wasn't optional so please cooperate ... I can't help that I'm ticklish!

Best of Luck,
Lexa, Princess Dustmop

Dear Lexa,
we are really glad that we don't have to be combed or have our hair cut. This procedures sound awful!

It's bad enough having our nails clipped.
Wheeks Tessy