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Grieving My Beloved Piggy

Ure97

Ure97

Junior Guinea Pig
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hi I'm new here. I don't really have anyone to speak to that understands my grief over the loss of my beloved piggy called dolly yesterday. She was diagnosed with bladder stones at 5 so vet suggested surgery.

The surgery went fine but she still seemed to squeak when she did a wee, and it broke my heart seeing her still in pain, even after the surgery. All week I syringe fed her. I insisted to the vet she was still not right, but he said it was post operative pain. I took her back again suggesting a change of treatment , so they agreed, all the time she was bright and responsive but was off food and squeaking when weeing.

The next day she seemed deflated and unresponsive and I rushed her back to the vet, which they thought might be due to the strong painkiller she'd had, however she did not improve, and the vet spoke to me in the morning to let me know there was no improvement. I made the decision to put her to sleep as I thought it was kinder, I don't think she could take anymore intervention.

I now feel guilty that I did not put her out of her misery sooner, and feel the vet kept giving me false hope. I am crying while writing this as I spent £500 trying to save her and thought I was doing the wright thing. I couldn't even be there when they put her to sleep as I was so upset, and feel guilty about that too. I only asked the vet to make sure it was peaceful, and to keep her in her blanket. I hope she didn't suffer while put to sleep. She was a very special piggy to me, as she and her sister were rescues.
 
Hello, I am so very sorry for the loss of little Dolly. First off you had to try all you could and I would have made the same decision as you surgery. After it was clear there were still issues, you made the kindest decision for her, you had to give surgery a shot so please don't beat yourself up on that.. It's hard when you can';t be there with them, but they always gas the piggies a little first before PTS so I promise she would have felt no pain during this and would have drifted off to peaceful sleep.

I know it is really raw right now but promise the pain does ease. You did everything right for little Dolly. We have a Rainbow Bridge section here were you can post a lasting memorial thread for her Rainbow Bridge Pets

We care so much for our pets they are like our family so please be kind to yourself. The Blue Cross have a support line if you feel you need to talk to someone in confidence about your loss
Pet Bereavement Support Service (The Blue Cross)
0800 096 6606 (free phone call) (8.30am-8.30pm)
Email: [email protected]
www.bluecross.org.uk

Once again, I am so very sorry, huge hugs

Lee x
 
Ure97 said:
hi I'm new here. I don't really have anyone to speak to that understands my grief over the loss of my beloved piggy called dolly yesterday. She was diagnosed with bladder stones at 5 so vet suggested surgery.

The surgery went fine but she still seemed to squeak when she did a wee, and it broke my heart seeing her still in pain, even after the surgery. All week I syringe fed her. I insisted to the vet she was still not right, but he said it was post operative pain. I took her back again suggesting a change of treatment , so they agreed, all the time she was bright and responsive but was off food and squeaking when weeing.

The next day she seemed deflated and unresponsive and I rushed her back to the vet, which they thought might be due to the strong painkiller she'd had, however she did not improve, and the vet spoke to me in the morning to let me know there was no improvement. I made the decision to put her to sleep as I thought it was kinder, I don't think she could take anymore intervention.

I now feel guilty that I did not put her out of her misery sooner, and feel the vet kept giving me false hope. I am crying while writing this as I spent £500 trying to save her and thought I was doing the wright thing. I couldn't even be there when they put her to sleep as I was so upset, and feel guilty about that too. I only asked the vet to make sure it was peaceful, and to keep her in her blanket. I hope she didn't suffer while put to sleep. She was a very special piggy to me, as she and her sister were rescues.
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BIG HUGS
I am ever so sorry for you loss! You are welcome to post a tribute to Dolly in our Rainbow Bridge section if or whenever it feels right for you.

It is always totally gutting when you lose one of yours in an op or post-op, even if there was no other option. You have given Dolly a chance at a longer and pain-free life which she would have otherwise not have had (stones do not go away on their own), and that is what counts! The outcome of the op is not in your control.

It is very normal for any loving owner to experience these feelings of guilt, which are usually much stronger when a procedure or treatment you have agreed on has gone wrong; this is very characteristic for the onset of the grieving process.
I know this because I have lost plenty of piggies in or after ops myself, especially in the olden days when bad reactions to the aneasthetics were even more common.
Today it is 10 years since I had to pts my Minx (who is still my most special piggy never mind the many that have come afterwards that I have also loved or that I have now and love dearly!) in the wake of her second bladder operation. By then, she not only had a stone but also a cancerous polyp in her bladder. The bladder trauma was just too great for any meds to work for more than a few days before she deteriorated. After the last possible combination started to fail, I had to let her go with a breaking heart. It took me a long time to get over it as there was nobody to talk to and not much understanding.
I still carry her in my heart now. She's never quite left me, but eventually I have come to cherish the three years I had with her and to feel blessed for having had them. It is a long and gradual process as you grieve to the extent you have loved, and there are no shortcuts; they are the two sides of the same coin. Give yourself time to grieve. it is not the species, but the depth of bond that determines how much you grieve. Grieving is not all bad; like light cannot really shine without shadow, love shines more brightly when you know about loss.

The normal practice of pts/euthanasia is to use anaesthetics to let a pet drift away to sleep first, so it won't feel anything and won't suffer. Please rest easy on that. Dolly has had a gentle journey to the Rainbow Bridge. ;)

Here are our tips on what you can do for Dolly's companion: Looking After A Bereaved Guinea Pig

If you find that you really struggle to come to terms with what has happened, please look for a free pet bereavement line in your country. These are manned by specially trained volunteers who will listen and help you. The forum members that have used this service have always reported that it has really helped them.
Here are the UK services: SupportLine - Problems: Pet Bereavement: Advice, support and information

You may want to start a diary to write about your feelings, but also about all your memories of Dolly; the large and the small, as they come to you. This way, her memory can never be taken from you.
 
sport_billy said:
Hello, I am so very sorry for the loss of little Dolly. First off you had to try all you could and I would have made the same decision as you surgery. After it was clear there were still issues, you made the kindest decision for her, you had to give surgery a shot so please don't beat yourself up on that.. It's hard when you can';t be there with them, but they always gas the piggies a little first before PTS so I promise she would have felt no pain during this and would have drifted off to peaceful sleep.

I know it is really raw right now but promise the pain does ease. You did everything right for little Dolly. We have a Rainbow Bridge section here were you can post a lasting memorial thread for her Rainbow Bridge Pets

We care so much for our pets they are like our family so please be kind to yourself. The Blue Cross have a support line if you feel you need to talk to someone in confidence about your loss
Pet Bereavement Support Service (The Blue Cross)
0800 096 6606 (free phone call) (8.30am-8.30pm)
Email: [email protected]
www.bluecross.org.uk

Once again, I am so very sorry, huge hugs

Lee x
Click to expand...
 
I'm so so sorry for your loss. I have been in your exact situation more times than I car to count in the last 12 months.

First of all, what you are feeling right now is completely normal. The guilt/second guessing yourself will fade. You -did- do the best by your little one and fought valiantly for her. Sometimes these treatments work and sometimes they sadly do not. Her age will certainly have been a factor in her recovery post-surgery. Your vet wouldn't have meant to give you false hope, I'm sure. They will have wanted to save her just as much as you did. Nobody wants to see a sweet little critter suffer and everyone hopes for the best.

Her passing would have been gentle and kind. She would have been given a little gas first to send her to sleep, so she will not have been aware or felt anything. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not staying for that. A lot of vets will not allow you to, actually. I have never stayed when one of my little ones have been PTS. I would rather remember them in their joy and vibrancy and if that's what you wanted too, that is totally fine.

The important thing now is to be kind to yourself. Know that you did everything you could by her. You fought valiantly. Take comfort in that when your girl needed your help, you were there and gave her all the help she needed. Don't second guess yourself. All of us would have done the same, I'm sure.

I'll tell you a story: This time last year, my precious 5 year old sow Siggy started passing blood when urinating. She was fine in and of herself, but the blood kept coming and going like clockwork every two weeks. We tried antibiotics, urine tests, anti imflammatory, clinical treatment after clinical treatment. We fought for her until March this year. 5 months. Nothing we did made her better. In the end, the only option left was surgery, she was spayed and it was revelaed she was full of masses and very infected. She would have died within days if we hadn't of done this, even though apart from the blood she appeared fine.

I brought her home at 7pm that day. She was very lethargic and clearly very ill. I syringe fed her the next few hours. She was not the piggy I knew before I had dropped her off for surgery that morning.

At 2.30am she had a heart attack and died in my arms in severe pain.

To this day I am filled with regret. It is so hard, to believe you are doing the best thing and then having it all go wrong. Looking back, I wish I had been able to give her a peaceful, kind, planned release over to the Rainbow Bridge.

What you did yesterday for your little one was a kindness. Absolutely. A last act of love, complete and unconditional. I'm going to type that again: It was an act of love.

We are all here for you. If you would like to talk, please feel free to PM me. I am here and I understand, as we all do.
 
Thanks so much for your kind words. It's hard to speak to people who don't have that connection with piggies. I've had piggies since I was young and they are like little best friends, and I find comfort in them when life is hard. Thank you for taking the time to reply x
 
Ure97 said:
Thanks so much for your kind words. It's hard to speak to people who don't have that connection with piggies. I've had piggies since I was young and they are like little best friends, and I find comfort in them when life is hard. Thank you for taking the time to reply x
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So sorry to hear about your special piggy. There’s not much more that I can add to the poignant words already sent to you. Everyone on this Forum feel Guinea Pigs are very special animals that need and deserve our love. After all, they give us so much happiness and add fulfilment to our lives. There’s always someone here ready to pass a few words with you. Xx
 
I'm so sorry to read about your sad loss; I'm in tears here myself, because I know the pain and guilt you must be feeling and have been there many times. I cannot really add any words of wisdom - Mishka, Wiebke & Lee's advice is spot on.
You did the right thing for Dolly and I would've done the exact same course of action in the circumstances. I have before, in fact.
big hugs x
BTW, do you still have her friend?
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. It is always so hard to have to make the decision to have a beloved pet put to sleep, and so easy to second-guess the decision. It sounds as though you did everything you could to help her, and then to ensure that she had a peaceful passing when her body had had enough. I've been present when pets have been put to sleep before and it has always been very peaceful. Take the time to grieve for Dolly and be kind for yourself. ((HUGS)) to you. Everyone here understands the grief that comes with losing a piggie and are here for support.
 
stripeybeanie said:
I'm so sorry to read about your sad loss; I'm in tears here myself, because I know the pain and guilt you must be feeling and have been there many times. I cannot really add any words of wisdom - Mishka, Wiebke & Lee's advice is spot on.
You did the right thing for Dolly and I would've done the exact same course of action in the circumstances. I have before, in fact.
big hugs x
BTW, do you still have her friend?
Click to expand...
Thank you .No, sadly her sister had to also be put to sleep due to another bladder stone 2 years ago, which also tore me up deeply. But dolly still had another 2 piggies for company. I think I loved them extra special as they were rescue piggies who were so adorable characters, and I felt so happy deep in my soul that I could give them a lovely home. I gave them the biggest house (not cage) with fleece and cuddly beds, even sometimes a mini hot water bottle in the winter under their fluffy bed, which they loved :).
 
Mishka said:
I'm so so sorry for your loss. I have been in your exact situation more times than I car to count in the last 12 months.

First of all, what you are feeling right now is completely normal. The guilt/second guessing yourself will fade. You -did- do the best by your little one and fought valiantly for her. Sometimes these treatments work and sometimes they sadly do not. Her age will certainly have been a factor in her recovery post-surgery. Your vet wouldn't have meant to give you false hope, I'm sure. They will have wanted to save her just as much as you did. Nobody wants to see a sweet little critter suffer and everyone hopes for the best.

Her passing would have been gentle and kind. She would have been given a little gas first to send her to sleep, so she will not have been aware or felt anything. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not staying for that. A lot of vets will not allow you to, actually. I have never stayed when one of my little ones have been PTS. I would rather remember them in their joy and vibrancy and if that's what you wanted too, that is totally fine.

The important thing now is to be kind to yourself. Know that you did everything you could by her. You fought valiantly. Take comfort in that when your girl needed your help, you were there and gave her all the help she needed. Don't second guess yourself. All of us would have done the same, I'm sure.

I'll tell you a story: This time last year, my precious 5 year old sow Siggy started passing blood when urinating. She was fine in and of herself, but the blood kept coming and going like clockwork every two weeks. We tried antibiotics, urine tests, anti imflammatory, clinical treatment after clinical treatment. We fought for her until March this year. 5 months. Nothing we did made her better. In the end, the only option left was surgery, she was spayed and it was revelaed she was full of masses and very infected. She would have died within days if we hadn't of done this, even though apart from the blood she appeared fine.

I brought her home at 7pm that day. She was very lethargic and clearly very ill. I syringe fed her the next few hours. She was not the piggy I knew before I had dropped her off for surgery that morning.

At 2.30am she had a heart attack and died in my arms in severe pain.

To this day I am filled with regret. It is so hard, to believe you are doing the best thing and then having it all go wrong. Looking back, I wish I had been able to give her a peaceful, kind, planned release over to the Rainbow Bridge.

What you did yesterday for your little one was a kindness. Absolutely. A last act of love, complete and unconditional. I'm going to type that again: It was an act of love.

We are all here for you. If you would like to talk, please feel free to PM me. I am here and I understand, as we all do.
Click to expand...
 
Mishka said:
I'm so so sorry for your loss. I have been in your exact situation more times than I car to count in the last 12 months.

First of all, what you are feeling right now is completely normal. The guilt/second guessing yourself will fade. You -did- do the best by your little one and fought valiantly for her. Sometimes these treatments work and sometimes they sadly do not. Her age will certainly have been a factor in her recovery post-surgery. Your vet wouldn't have meant to give you false hope, I'm sure. They will have wanted to save her just as much as you did. Nobody wants to see a sweet little critter suffer and everyone hopes for the best.

Her passing would have been gentle and kind. She would have been given a little gas first to send her to sleep, so she will not have been aware or felt anything. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not staying for that. A lot of vets will not allow you to, actually. I have never stayed when one of my little ones have been PTS. I would rather remember them in their joy and vibrancy and if that's what you wanted too, that is totally fine.

The important thing now is to be kind to yourself. Know that you did everything you could by her. You fought valiantly. Take comfort in that when your girl needed your help, you were there and gave her all the help she needed. Don't second guess yourself. All of us would have done the same, I'm sure.

I'll tell you a story: This time last year, my precious 5 year old sow Siggy started passing blood when urinating. She was fine in and of herself, but the blood kept coming and going like clockwork every two weeks. We tried antibiotics, urine tests, anti imflammatory, clinical treatment after clinical treatment. We fought for her until March this year. 5 months. Nothing we did made her better. In the end, the only option left was surgery, she was spayed and it was revelaed she was full of masses and very infected. She would have died within days if we hadn't of done this, even though apart from the blood she appeared fine.

I brought her home at 7pm that day. She was very lethargic and clearly very ill. I syringe fed her the next few hours. She was not the piggy I knew before I had dropped her off for surgery that morning.

At 2.30am she had a heart attack and died in my arms in severe pain.

To this day I am filled with regret. It is so hard, to believe you are doing the best thing and then having it all go wrong. Looking back, I wish I had been able to give her a peaceful, kind, planned release over to the Rainbow Bridge.

What you did yesterday for your little one was a kindness. Absolutely. A last act of love, complete and unconditional. I'm going to type that again: It was an act of love.

We are all here for you. If you would like to talk, please feel free to PM me. I am here and I understand, as we all do.
Click to expand...
 
Thank you for your comforting words. I was actually in floods of tears reading everyone's lovely messages as it means so much. I have been so depressed thinking of her little face which looked like fear in her eyes in her last couple of days. Life is so bloody cruel at times.
 
Ure97 said:
Thank you for your comforting words. I was actually in floods of tears reading everyone's lovely messages as it means so much. I have been so depressed thinking of her little face which looked like fear in her eyes in her last couple of days. Life is so bloody cruel at times.
Click to expand...

Huge hugs x
 
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