Guinea Pig Grief

[Emma03]

Hi there, I would just like to clarify before I begin that I am from Australia but I'm really looking for advice and any would be grately appreciated right now.

I have just had to (only hours ago) make the decision to put one of my two boys to sleep. I feel awful as Perry was only a little over a year old but was having problems with scurvy and bloating (although only showing symptoms for about a week) and had been going to the vet for the past four days in a row to receive supplements and injections for pain relief and gastrational support. It ended up being problems with my little Perry's breathing and his very slim chance of pulling through this (and ultimately having to suffer if I chose to take him back home with me) that caused me to make the decision. As neither of my boys have had any medical issues before this has really taken its toll on me and all I can feel is guilt in how my little baby has been suffering because of my poor choices in my two babies diet.

What I wanted to know was how I should help my other boy, Percy, through this process. I've been reading that I should get him another cage mate but I am not financially (these vet bills have come up to over 1k) or emotionally ready to 'replace' Perry. Percy hasn't been showing any signs of depression as of yet although it has only been four hours but I have put that down to him being slightly used to being away from Perry for a while over the past few days because of his vet appointments and my monitoring him. Percy is also extremely dominant and with Perry not having been from the same litter he was dominant over him to an extent although he still did show his love for him.

I could never give Percy up to someone who will provide him with another cage mate as selfish as that sounds but I have already had to make one heart breaking selfless decision tonight that no 18 year old should have to make.
I would just like to know if anyone could give any advice into helping Percy adjust to life without Perry.

 

[sport_billy]

hello, first off I am really sorry for your loss. I truly mean that. Nothing ever prepares you for losing a pet or a person whom you love. Grief is so complex and at the moment with it being so soon you are going through the worst part of it - when the pain of loss is so raw Love and loss are two sides of the same coin, you can never truly have one without the other... but the love is always worth the loss.

Having to make the choice to PTS is always a difficult and painful one, not only do we have to face the loss of our pet... but we have played a role in it by deciding it is time to help them across the bridge. Please know this, it is a brave decision to make and you did it with love at the forefront of your mind, you would never make the choice if it wasn't the best thing for Perry. You were there for him when he needed you the most and you did not let him down. None of this is your fault some piggies are prone to illnesses more than others, I have had two piggies whom have had bad bloat issues at one time or another.

Please keep a good eye on Percy as I am sure you will, is he eating okay? Piggies grieve for their friends but they do have a huge survival instinct that will kick in, eating and drinking are great signs he is coping although expect him to be quieter than normal so please spend extra time with him. Have a read of this thread here Looking After A Bereaved Guinea Pig

In a few days have a think about what you can do for Percy int he future, as you know piggies do need company of their own kind but if Percy is eating you can have time to think on your next move.

Sorry again for you loss, welcome to the forum I am sorry it is in such sad circumstances
Lee

 

[Wiebke]

Hi there, I would just like to clarify before I begin that I am from Australia but I'm really looking for advice and any would be grately appreciated right now.

I have just had to (only hours ago) make the decision to put one of my two boys to sleep. I feel awful as Perry was only a little over a year old but was having problems with scurvy and bloating (although only showing symptoms for about a week) and had been going to the vet for the past four days in a row to receive supplements and injections for pain relief and gastrational support. It ended up being problems with my little Perry's breathing and his very slim chance of pulling through this (and ultimately having to suffer if I chose to take him back home with me) that caused me to make the decision. As neither of my boys have had any medical issues before this has really taken its toll on me and all I can feel is guilt in how my little baby has been suffering because of my poor choices in my two babies diet.

What I wanted to know was how I should help my other boy, Percy, through this process. I've been reading that I should get him another cage mate but I am not financially (these vet bills have come up to over 1k) or emotionally ready to 'replace' Perry. Percy hasn't been showing any signs of depression as of yet although it has only been four hours but I have put that down to him being slightly used to being away from Perry for a while over the past few days because of his vet appointments and my monitoring him. Percy is also extremely dominant and with Perry not having been from the same litter he was dominant over him to an extent although he still did show his love for him.

I could never give Percy up to someone who will provide him with another cage mate as selfish as that sounds but I have already had to make one heart breaking selfless decision tonight that no 18 year old should have to make.
I would just like to know if anyone could give any advice into helping Percy adjust to life without Perry.

Hi and welcome!

I am very sorry for your loss! Having to put a beloved one to sleep is the most loving, but also the most heart-breaking gift we can make pet to spare it any further suffering. You are a very caring piggy mummy indeed. Sadly, fast climbing vet cost in case of a severe illness is not something that most people think of when they get pets. It is great that you have not failed Percy and have seen a vet, even if it has made your purse bleed as badly as your heart.

Here are our tips on what you can do for a bereaved piggy in the short as well as the long term: Looking After A Bereaved Guinea Pig

Please consider that healthy guinea pigs live to 5-7 years of age and even longer and that they are social animals with different needs to our own feelings. They really need 24/7 company of their own kind, which is something you just cannot replace yourself with your own commitments in the longer term. Any new companion is not for you; it is strictly for Perry.

You will find that any new piggy and relationship is completely different and has other dynamics than the one with Percy, as each bond is unique and cannot be replaced. You will build up a bond in your own time, once (and only when) you are yourself ready, which can take a while.
It took me several weeks after my special piggy Minx had to be pts 10 years ago (and costing me a similar amount to yours even then after two bladder stone operations and daily vet visits in the last 10 days of her life because she was such a fighter) before I was able to feel anything whatsoever towards her companion's rescue dated choice of a companion, a neutered boar called Llewelyn. In time I became very fond of him; at first just for the fact that Minx's companion was head over heels in love with him and made me smile even when I didn't think I would be able to - without taking anything away from Minx! That took me many months to come to terms with, but I learned that I could enjoy my new couple on its own terms nevertheless. Today I feel blessed to have had them all in my life. You usually only ralise just how much a piggy has been missing company when they go overboard with joy meeting a new friend and immediately kind of fully come alive; that is the only way I can describe it, having witnessed several more of these miracles in the meantime.

You will find that the difference in Perry and seeing him happy and taken care of is going to ease your own heart.

There are some good guinea pig rescues in Australia but not in all states. Some may be open to the request of finding a companion for the life time of Perry that reverts to the rescue if you do not want to continue with guinea pigs as your life is likely going to get even busier in the few years.

Where in Australia are you? Could you please add your state to your details, so we can help you most efficiently.

PS: Dominance doesn't have anything to do with not being related; it happens between siblings just the same as a hierarchy is at the heart of guinea pig society and dominance behaviour is the way this essential hierarchy is expressed. How strong dominance is is a matter of personality and character balance. It is most prominent when boars go through their teenage months and suffer from high level testosterone spikes between 4-14 of age.

 

[Freela]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Having to have a pet put to sleep is always a very difficult decision. I have been there a few times myself and know how hard it is. I also know firsthand how hard it can be to 'replace' a guinea pig when you are still grieving the one you've lost. Unfortunately, hard as it may feel for you, it is ultimately probably the best for your remaining guinea pig. They are social animals that do better with company. Especially at a year of age, he potentially has quite a long life ahead of him and it would be a shame for him to spend it alone. So give some serious thought to adopting a companion for him in the near future. I know I have often gotten a new guinea pig before I felt emotionally finished grieving... and yes, it was difficult for me to feel much for them at first, but in time I came to know them and love them just as much as the pig who came before them. And remember, it's not 'replacing.' Individuals are not replaceable. It's forming a new friendship with a new individual and allowing your remaining pig to form a new relationship with a new individual. None of my pigs have ever been replaced and I still remember them often and with love... but I know that Hadley is very glad to have a new friend in Leela after we lost her prior companion, Sundae, last February, just as I know that Sundae was very glad to meet Hadley after we lost her prior companion, Linney, several years back. So it's definitely something to consider for the future. For info, guinea pigs do not need to be part of the same litter to get along, and they will not get along better if they are siblings. It's down to personality, not age or whether or not they share genetics. All pigs have a dominant pig... it's the nature of their society. I have also found that it was harder for my more submissive pig to deal with the loss of a dominant companion than the other way around. My dominant pigs were subdued but otherwise okay to lose a friend... my submissive pig was very distressed/fearful to lose 'the boss.' Just something to keep an eye on.

In the short term, you will want to make sure that Percy is not acutely pining. Make sure he is eating and drinking. I would weigh regularly to make sure he is maintaining weight. You may see changes in behavior, such as being less active or more withdrawn (guinea pigs tend to feel insecure alone, which may lead to more hiding or more anxiety/fear and reluctance to engage in behavior that feels 'risky.' One of my meeker pigs wouldn't leave the cage until we got another pig for company.) Guinea pigs also tend to 'play' with other pigs and the presence of another pig brings out their natural social behaviors, so these may not be expressed in the absence of another pig and thus the pig may appear quiet or apathetic. But, in the short term, eating and drinking are the most important things to keep an eye on.

Hope this helps a bit and, again, I'm sorry for your loss.