COVID-19 I need a reminder that things aren't really that bad

Lorcan

Lorcan

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I know that sounds like I'm trying to make light of this mess that we're in, but I'm not. I don't do worry very well - as in, I don't know how to worry in the first place. I swing between "well it could be worse, what've we got, let's take stock and get on with it" and "THE WORLD IS ENDING MY HEART'S ABOUT TO BEAT OUT OF MY CHEST DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME IT'S NOT THAT BAD YOU'RE A FILTHY LIAR PANIC STATIONS".

I have some very interesting conversations in my head, and yes, I had to sanitise that previous sentence a little.

Anyway. My social worker's working from home at the minute - spoke to her on Wednesday and it turns out she's got a cough. Had a test, still waiting for the results to come back. She's off Thursday and since I managed to stay awake for 26 hours yesterday, I fell asleep at 9am this morning and missed any chance of calling today. Why has this been the one thing to panic me this badly? I don't know. Maybe. It doesn't matter either way. I have hit the panic stage and I'd really appreciate a reminder that this is not the end of the world. Because it isn't, but my head just doesn't quite believe itself right now.
 
You are healthy. There are people who have had Covid-19 and overcome it. Two in the news some weeks ago recovered. One was around 90 and had been in hospital. The other was over 100yrs if I recall. I’ve also had two relatives come down with it and they recovered.

I understand why it panicked you though - is it being so close to home, so to speak?

Sorry some blathering but I hope it’s helped somewhat 🤷🏾‍♀️☺️
 
Recognise this myself - a couple of times I have out of the blue felt such fear and true panic I’ve had to give myself a good talking to. Just remind yourself you are young and healthy, are protecting yourself, the NHS and society at large by staying at home and social distancing, and that this will one day be over. We are living through a very abnormal phase in history. Just take time to ground yourself
 
I mean she said she's not expecting the test to come back positive and she had a dig at me because I coughed during the call - heh, we sounded as bad as each other. Except I've been coughing for what, 6 months? I'm good on the coughing front.

I just...I wasn't doing brilliantly even before this kicked off and now with social distancing and everything else I've not seen anybody (mental health wise) since what, February? I know it's selfish but part of me doesn't want another bump in the road just as restrictions start to ease, it's taken too long for that as it is. Except it's not actually that selfish because my health, mental or otherwise, is important.

Someone told me I should try giving up smoking during the lockdown. I swear it's the only thing keeping me sane right now.
 
It's hard when so much is uncontrollable. I hope you are able to connect with your social worker soon and find out if everything is okay there.

We are all in this together, and it's such a good thing that we are able to keep everyone as safe as possible. You're not alone and things will get better.
 
It’s not selfish. Your mental health is taking a kicking so not wanting another bump in the road is acceptable. I’m sending you a virtual hug.
 
Firstly what you feel it is never selfish.
Your reality is your reality, and if it's hard, it's hard.
There are others worse off and better off than you, but it doesn't main that it's not ok ot find your own reality hard.

Mental health is one of those complex things that is easy to under estimate becasue it's not immediately visible.
I have friends who have mental health issues and they are thriving under lock-down conditions, but for others it isn't quite so easy.

It will end.
It will eventually be over.
And right now you are doing the best you can with what you have.
We all are, and we are here for you.
 
The one thing you can always, absolutely, with no uncertainty what so ever rely upon in the world is that things never, ever stay the same. This WILL come to an end, we will hear on the news that no one died today, there were no new cases, the first baby conceived during lockdown was born and given some ridiculous name to mark the occasion 😂
The lack of control is what is getting to me, personally. When my fight or flight kicks in, my instinct is usually to fight, but I have nowhere to direct that with this. I'm the kind of person who will keep it all together until this is over and then i'll have a bit of a breakdown about it, but holding it together until then is exhausting. None of us know how best to deal with whats going on in the world right now, we're not alone ❤
 
You know the worst part? I'm fine with me getting it. I mean yes I'll be ill, possibly very ill, but in my head that's a totally doable scenario. My brain only starts with the doomsday panicking when it's someone else, even if that someone else has (as far as I know) far fewer risk factors than I do and is therefore far more likely to come out of this with no problems.

Eriathwen said:
The lack of control is what is getting to me, personally. When my fight or flight kicks in, my instinct is usually to fight, but I have nowhere to direct that with this. I'm the kind of person who will keep it all together until this is over and then i'll have a bit of a breakdown about it, but holding it together until then is exhausting. None of us know how best to deal with whats going on in the world right now, we're not alone ❤
Click to expand...

Ahh, so much of this. I'm the sort of person who'd be yelling at everyone else to "calm the **** down" if in a crisis and they need to stop panicking (I'm not very good at being...nice, you might have noticed hah) but then once everything's calmed down and I've gone to have a cigarette it's like the panic explodes.

Swissgreys said:
Mental health is one of those complex things that is easy to under estimate becasue it's not immediately visible.
I have friends who have mental health issues and they are thriving under lock-down conditions, but for others it isn't quite so easy.
Click to expand...

For the most part I've been great. Mostly sat, headphones on, playing videogames all day...which I'd have done anyway but now there's no added guilt of from being unemployed. I can't work anyway, for a number of reasons, but everyone involved in my health says the same thing. But it's nice to not have that guilt. Plus there's something rather amusing about sending messages to a friend at 3am "MATE I'M RIDING A DINOSAUR".

But the problem's been some stuff that needs doing, needs doing through the social worker. And even when she hasn't been isolating at home (she's been working from home on and off for several weeks) everyone's been having to cover for staff off sick and nobody wants to pass along messages, just saying "we'll get her to call you instead." Which is great until she can't call back for a week and as a result you've had no medication for a week. When all they had to do was pass along a message saying "Could you call X and tell them about Y".
 
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