It's A Hard Life Being A Pampered Piggie.

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Pawz

Pawz

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You know our hoomans are so difficult to train!

Today one offered Flynn and I some strawberries.. STRAWBERRIES when I wanted Blueberries to munch on while day dreaming about that hearththrob Eddi. Honestly they can't get anything right.

Would anyone like to trade hoomans? Or are yours equally as terrible. Psh Strawberries *eyeroll*

-Freyja
 
Ha, I hear you Freyja.
No blueberries here either - something about the 'wrong season' as if there is ever a wrong season to eat blueberries.
Anyway today was also quite traumatic for me as the slaves gave us a branch (that part was good), and then said soon we won't have branches either.
Apparently branches also have a 'season'.
Frankly I am thinking I need better slaves, or new seasons.

Love Eddi.

PS - I don't like strawberries either, but ask your slaves for a grape - grapes are quite nice.
 
We hear you Freyja, our human has orders to bring us fresh blueberries every Wednesday as we demand our treats then :own:.
You need better trained slaves :nod: who do as demanded.
(doesn't matter that she is waiting in for the last bits to our new home to come for the building at the weekend :cool:)

guinea pigs
Spice, Cinnamon, Saffron and Nutmeg
 
Oh tell me about it. We love our humans, but they severely starve us. One salad bowl a day?! 24/7 salad should be available. With a fruit dispensing machine.
The humans looking after us have a mother who gave us a nibble of parsnip and carrot, as she was peeling them.
Now why aren't all hoomans like that? Sigh.
 
Freyja,

It seems that this issue with incompetent hoomans is a huge problem. Even way over her in the USA our hoomans need shaping up. Every morning the hooman allows us our favorite vitamin c tab while we wait starving for her to prepare the morning veggies. This morning she had the nerve to offer us a digestive support tab instead. I vaguely heard her saying something about running out and waiting for delivery over my screams of displeasure and reprimanding. I don't know who delivery is but they better show up before tomorrow if the hooman wants to avoid a full out revolt.
Perhaps you can try obedience school. I have heard it may help.
Wishing you luck in training your hooman.

With love
Tonks
 
I think we might have to give up on our hoomans, they seem very stupid creatures. First they offered us a yellow pepper - yellow! - instead of an orange one which they know we like the best, then they tried to pacify us with a red one claiming that you could put yellow and red together and it would be the same when we all know it isn't.

Then - then! Their parents had the audacity to offer us something called Purple Sprouting Broccoli because they had heard broccoli was Thorunn's favourite treat. Which it is. But this purple stuff is not broccoli. We have tried expressing our displeasure by throwing it around the hutch but the hoomans just seem to think this is cute.

We have also heard a terrible rumour that soon their will be no more cobs of corn which means no more husks either. I think these 'seasons' are a lie the hoomans make up to cover their inadequacy. Our demands are quite reasonable really.

In sympathy,
Siggy, Auslag, Thorunn and Helga
 
CogGirl said:
Then - then! Their parents had the audacity to offer us something called Purple Sprouting Broccoli because they had heard broccoli was Thorunn's favourite treat. Which it is. But this purple stuff is not broccoli. We have tried expressing our displeasure by throwing it around the hutch but the hoomans just seem to think this is cute.

In sympathy,
Siggy, Auslag, Thorunn and Helga
Click to expand...


I am so glad its not just my slaves that are useless, honestly these hoomans.. everyone knows Broccoli is GREEN. Do you think if we all banded together to educate them we could get a group discount in their "how to be a good hooman servant" course?

-Freyja
 
~Freyja
I have checked the prices and they want a paw and an ear to train these Hoomans. I have found the best course of action is to scream as loud as possible, start a food strike or peeing on the Hoomans to show when we are displeased with their actions. They will learn eventually. Ginger and I have also discovered that if you do things that these hoomans find "soo sweet" or "too cute" they will usually abandon their tyrant actions and provide a carrot treat or an extra leaf of favorite lettuce. The most effective action we have found is popcorning in unison, standing up and begging and allowing the hoomans to touch us.
Wishing you luck with these creatures we grace with our presence.

Love,
Tonks
 
It's Max and Bubble here.........what's a blueberry?

Apparently our hooman doesn't like them, but I hear they are delicious.

We are allowed the odd strawberry, which we love, but we don't get nearly enough for our liking! Aaaandd, we often just get mostly the strawberry tops, with not enough of the luscious berries. How can our hooman be so cruel?

@Swissgreys Eddi - you don't know how lucky you are? Do you like strawberries as well?
 
Dear all disgruntled piggies,
We're considering calling the RSPCA. The hoomans just don't love us. Godfrey sat on the hooman's chest and licked her face a lot, and her mouth, and she made happy noises like "uurh" and "rpgrrfhfhf". We're so kind, and generous, we allow them the honour of petting us, and still not enough treats. I hear they get our foods from a magical cave called "the fridge". Why can't WE have fridges?

The "seasons" are definitely a lie. I've heard words like "costs", "expense" and "price". Clearly just gibberish. May start pooping on them some more.

We wish you all the best of luck with your hoomans,
Godfrey and Duncan
P.S PURPLE BROCCOLI? What's next, green carrots?!
 
Poor piggies what you've had to put up with :yikes: tsk tsk tsk!

Hoomans please listen and take note of the dreadful plight these hardly done by piggies have had to tolerate :eek: I do hope you hoomans will learn the lesson that you are slaves and must obey all requests! :nod:
 
Dear Fellow sufferers,

I agree with all the above, what is a purple carrot!? Yellow and red don't make orange! And what on earth is a season!?
As leader of my clan I may have to take it upon myself to recruit some new hoomans, even 5 isn't enough in this house hold! I have found that the smartest ones are the smallest, as they always meet with the deadlines on the demands, however, they do seem to enjoy screaming...
Do you know the other day my absolute favourite, Kale, was not brought to me in its curly form, it was smooth! Apparently it was just the same, however, I strongly disagree.

In deepest sympathy,
Coco.
 
Eilidh said:
Dear Fellow sufferers,

I agree with all the above, what is a purple carrot!? Yellow and red don't make orange! And what on earth is a season!?
As leader of my clan I may have to take it upon myself to recruit some new hoomans, even 5 isn't enough in this house hold! I have found that the smartest ones are the smallest, as they always meet with the deadlines on the demands, however, they do seem to enjoy screaming...
Do you know the other day my absolute favourite, Kale, was not brought to me in its curly form, it was smooth! Apparently it was just the same, however, I strongly disagree.

In deepest sympathy,
Coco.
Click to expand...

I was once offered a black Carrot (Not sure if that's what you call a purple one in your location). The hooman tried to assure me it was fresh and meant to be this color but I was NOT falling for that!

Even more disgusting, I caught one of the slaves enquiring about a rat cage today. So it looks as if that is still a serious topic around here. Flynn told me what rats are and they sound like ugly thin piggies with pointy faces and scaley tails! I'm not sure I like the sound of those AT ALL.

-Freyja.
 
Chock has such a hard life what with shredding toilet rolls, eating 4 different types of hay that are switched regularly
Salad shredding
Pellet munching
Having a nice wooden house of hay to snuggle up in and a play box full of hay for outside time
His life is really really hard so he says....
 
My hooman is a cheapskate! Always buys the reduced veggies! I can see those yellow stickers you know! :evil:

Why won't she learn that I deserve the best organic produce?!

Peace out brother piggies,

-Pumpkin
 
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