My beautiful fluffy Noella

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poggle

Adult Guinea Pig
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I found my beautiful Noella crossing the bridge this morning. I tried food and water but she was already cooling and twitching, couldn't lift her head at all, and I knew I was already much too late to help.

We had a lovely long cuddle and I've popped her in a cosy so she can be with her daughter and husband, she always liked them more than me and they deserved time with her too. Currently willing myself to go back and check that she's really gone.

All I can think about is that I didn't clean them out last night because I was tired and could "always do it in the morning". I found her when I was cleaning them out before the toddler woke up. My brain won't let me remember checking their water last night and I'm so scared I didn't. She was so tiny and light, much lighter than she felt last weekend, and I'm scared I missed an illness. I was staying with my parents and came back yesterday, and I'm scared that if I'd been here I would have been able to spot that she wasn't okay. She was her usual lairy self when I left.

Can't really put off going to check any longer. She was so young. I can't believe it
 
I’m so sorry. I’m sure there were no signs to miss as they do hide it well. You gave her a wonderful life. Sleep tight Noella.
 
We always have these ‘what ifs and if only’ but try not to be hard on yourself - our piggies are very good at hiding illness and Noella was doing this. Take care of yourself
Popcorn freely at RB beautiful Noella
 
Please don’t think it’s anything to do with not cleaning them out :hug: I’m so sorry you lost Noella, she will have known just how much you loved and cared for her x

Sleep tight little lady 🌈
 
So sorry for your loss.
You filled Noella’s life with love which is what really matters.
Be gentle with yourself as you grieve.
 
Sorry for your loss. You did everything you could for Noella, she knew she was cared for and surrounded by lots of love. Sleep tight Noella x
 
Thank you everyone.

I hope she knows she was loved; I just wish her last night had been that fresh-cage exploration and feast. With the cat and now this it's hard not to feel like it's the common denominator's fault (me). My confidence as an animal lover has really been shaken in the last month.

Noella is now buried under some flowers in a sunny spot in our garden. The pog run is very quiet tonight - Noella was the favourite wife and a beloved mother. It was a lovely home for three but seems much too empty for two. It still doesn't seem real. Nixie's been so obviously miserable all day and it is so heart breaking to see.
 
I am sorry for the loss of your much loved piggy. We always think its maybe something we did wrong, or should have done something else but please do not blame yourself. She would have known how much you loved her - it was her time to run free over the rainbow bridge. She will always be in your heart.
Popcorn free Noella ❤️ 🌈
 
I’m so sorry that Noella has left for the Rainbow Bridge. I’m afraid it’s part of the human grief process that we question everything we did or did not do. Please don’t let the what ifs torture you. She was so well cared for and loved. Big hugs x
 
Sending you hugs, think of all the happy memories you have.
You definitely ARE an animal lover, be kind to yourself ❤️
 
Thank you again everyone.

Today I realised that one day we can rescue another sow or two, and it wasn't as painful a thought as I'd expected. It's still too fresh for the moment but I'd resolved to have three so that no-one would be left alone unexpectedly (hopefully). Rescues are under such pressure at the moment and if there is any silver lining at all it's that at some point we can help a bit more.

For the moment I've set up a new ticklist on my phone which breaks up my daily pet care into small chunks. Hopefully something tangible to reassure myself with will help, and I won't need to worry about forgetting that I've forgotten to do something again.
 
poggle said:
Thank you everyone.

I hope she knows she was loved; I just wish her last night had been that fresh-cage exploration and feast. With the cat and now this it's hard not to feel like it's the common denominator's fault (me). My confidence as an animal lover has really been shaken in the last month.

Noella is now buried under some flowers in a sunny spot in our garden. The pog run is very quiet tonight - Noella was the favourite wife and a beloved mother. It was a lovely home for three but seems much too empty for two. It still doesn't seem real. Nixie's been so obviously miserable all day and it is so heart breaking to see.
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Guinea pigs grieve too.
Micah and Naomi were very quiet and subdued for a few days after Naomi’s unexpected death.
I relate to how you feel about a large cage seeming empty.
I took out a 4x4 section of the C&C which makes it much more a cage for 2.

Human grief takes longer than piggy grief to work through and ‘ what if ? ‘ is a perfectly normal part of the the grieving process..
Sadly, the price we pay for loving our pets is a broken heart when we lose them, and we only grieve when we have loved.
Holding you in my heart ♥️
 
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