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My Little Legend :(

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mickey2090

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first ever post...........god i wish i joined this years ago........

lost my little legend yesterday. we had nearly 10 years together. started with 2 together as babies but alf died after 5 years.
course, always knew this day would come, and i would obviously be upset. but I'm shocked at what it has done to me. I'm absolutely devastated. a complete wreck. he was such a special little guy. so friendly. the hole he has left, well its an absolute chasm. i can barely set foot in the room he was in without breaking down...... any message would be appreciated

:(
 

Freela

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I'm so sorry for your loss! I recently lost my oldest girl, Linney, who was six, and it has been so difficult. Of course I knew she was aging and the day would come, but it's impossible to be prepared and losing her has left a hole in my heart that no one else will fill. So I completely empathize with your loss. They truly are special and each is unique and they fill a special place in our hearts and that loss hurts very much. Everyone here will understand that feeling too! It sounds like at ten years, you gave him a good, LONG life, and he was obviously very loved and I'm sure he knew that every day of his life. I know it's minimum consolation, but a lot of piggies don't have someone who will love them and nurture them for ten long years and remember them after they've gone, and he was lucky to have you just as you were lucky to have him. I know when Linney passed, I just kept reminding myself that none of us can live forever, but it was my job to give her a wonderful life, and I did that every day, and in turn I was so blessed to have her as a part of my family for all those years and would always remember and be thankful, and that in time the pain would fade but the memories would last. ((HUGS))- I wish there was more I could say!
 

mickey2090

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wonderful message. thank you! sorry to hear that as well! it is so sad.

yep, its incredible the attachment you get with them. i live with 2 other people, but they are often out. i work from home. so hits me so much more you know as i was around him every day, seeing and talking and singing(!) in the room with him. its amazing the difference its made already. the place has felt so empty.
ye i keep telling myself he had a great life i hope. he had absolutely nothing wrong with him for 7 years which is pretty good going i reckon?

its tough now, not sure whether to get another? obviously way too soon now, but in time? i dont want it to feel like I'm 'replacing' him you know? cos to me he was totally irreplaceable.there was something so special about him. i dunno, shouldnt be thinking about that now.

ye its hit me very hard. seeing him pretty much everyday bar a couple of holidays, for nearly a decade........ devastating. was a true part of the family!

thanks again, hope your doing better? :)
 

Lady Kelly

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Oh bless you, it doesn't matter how expected the death is or how prepared you think you are no one can ever be ready for that sort of pain.

If you are thinking about new pig(a) then don't think of it as replacing (as you say each individual piggy is irreplaceable) just think of it as a progression of providing their space to a new pig as you obviously have a lot of love to give. You will know when the time is right
 

Wiebke

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HUGS

What a great old age Legend has lived to! That is very rare - but of course, it is even more difficult to get used to no longer having him in your life anymore after such a long time! The first few days are especially hard, as all the thousand little unthinking routines and gestures bring your loss home time after time while your wound is still raw and painful.

You'll never stop missing him and he will always have a very special place in your heart. I try to think of my RIP piggies as my litte furry guardian angels that help me look out over my current piggies. When you are ready for it, you may want to set Legend a memorial of some sort. It can be a stone or some carved wood with his name, a framed picture or a collage of pictures or an album, an embroidery, a painting etc. Sometimes, I have also sponsored permanent rescue residents that either looked similar or shared a name or a story with one of my passed piggies in their memory or made a donation to a guinea pig rescue in memory.

You are also welcome to post a tribute to Legend in our Rainbow Bridge section and share your precious memories with us whenever it feels right for you and you can cope with it.

It would be great if you could give a couple of guinea pigs a loving home in due time; if you can, please look at rescue guinea pigs that are either unwanted or have been rescued from horrible places and that deserve to be given lots of the kind of love that you obviously have in abundance. If necessary, look for sows or a mixed gender pair (neutered boar/sow) that will take you in a completely new direction as the interaction and dynamics are quite different to what you are used to from boars.
Love is like a river, it flows on into a new channel when its old course is blocked, it doesn't just dry up. But the old riverbed will always remain carved into your heart... Each piggy is unique and so is each bond; you will find that you love any new piggy in a different way and for different reasons. Legend will always remain special to you!
PS: We have got a recommended good standard UK rescue locator on the top bar, but can also provide contacts for rescues in other countries.

If you find that your bereavement is seriously interfering with your ability to cope with your daily life or your sleep for any length of time, please seek help. Pet bereavement can happen to anybody, but it is now recognised as a serious issue and there are free lines with trained people at the other end to help you through it. How much you grieve, depends on the depth of your bond, not on the species.
Here is an overview over the UK services available: http://www.supportline.org.uk/problems/bereavement_pets.php
 

7squeakers.

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Oh gosh, so sorry to hear of your loss. Everyone on here knows exactly what you are talking about!
Our hearts and minds are with you at this traumatic time. BIG ((((HUGS!))))

P.S. Welcome to the forum!
 

mickey2090

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thanks for the kind words guys. ye still very tough. it is the little things. like going to the shops this morning and not having to buy his fav fresh foods for the first time, well ever, since i lived here. killed me that.
 
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piggyfan

Hello. I just wanted to say how sorry I am that you are in pain. I have been in the same situation as you and it really is heartbreaking. I am sending you hugs. xx
 

mickey2090

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thank you i appreciate that.
yes i cant believe how hard it has hit me. burying him was so tough. i cant bring myself to empty his cage.
just wondering how long it took you guys to feel a bit more 'normal' after going through this? i know its only been a couple of days for me, but it feels like its going to take a long time :(
x
 
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piggyfan

For me when I have lost a little one it takes several months but I do not want to upset you by saying that. I have mental illness which is why it would naturally take me longer to get over something like that. I think we are all different and all you can do is allow yourself time to grieve and do not try and rush yourself.
 

AbiS

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Oh, I am so sorry for your loss, it is just absolutely heartbreaking. You obviously gave Legend a fabulous home and life and looked after him supremely for him to be that age. We all understand what you are going through so keep talking as long as you need to and we will be here for you.

@Wiebke - you just made me cry with this:
"Love is like a river, it flows on into a new channel when its old course is blocked, it doesn't just dry up. But the old riverbed will always remain carved into your heart..."

Such a beautiful thing to say
 

helen105281

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I'm really sorry for your loss. He was a fantastic age which must make it even harder for you.
 

Freela

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wonderful message. thank you! sorry to hear that as well! it is so sad.

yep, its incredible the attachment you get with them. i live with 2 other people, but they are often out. i work from home. so hits me so much more you know as i was around him every day, seeing and talking and singing(!) in the room with him. its amazing the difference its made already. the place has felt so empty.
ye i keep telling myself he had a great life i hope. he had absolutely nothing wrong with him for 7 years which is pretty good going i reckon?

its tough now, not sure whether to get another? obviously way too soon now, but in time? i dont want it to feel like I'm 'replacing' him you know? cos to me he was totally irreplaceable.there was something so special about him. i dunno, shouldnt be thinking about that now.

ye its hit me very hard. seeing him pretty much everyday bar a couple of holidays, for nearly a decade........ devastating. was a true part of the family!

thanks again, hope your doing better? :)
I work from home as well, so I know what you're saying! I 'see' my pigs more than any of the people in my family, simply because the people leave to go out to work and school and the pigs and I are home. They are in the same room as my 'office' and I interact with them a lot throughout the day, so I definitely get attached and they become a fixture in my life and it's SO hard to lose that.

As for when/whether to get another one... I think when it's time, you'll know. In my case, I've always been left with half a pair who would be happier with a friend, so I often got a companion for the remaining pig before I felt ready to get one emotionally. It would take me awhile to warm up to them... but eventually I would love them just as much. They're not a replacement- the animals we've loved and lost can never be replaced. Individuals are not replaceable. But you build a new relationship with a new pig who you will love in their own way, for the unique individual that they are. There's a poem I really like called A Dog's Last Will and Testament (you can apply it to any pet, though it's written for dogs. It's very easy to find online.) The jist of it is that if an animal could write a will, they would leave their home and their belongings and the love of their family to another animal in need, because what animals have to pass on is the love they leave behind. It always makes me cry, but it really speaks to me... they leave so much love behind. The best thing I can do in their memory is to pay it forward to an animal who needs a home. And it will make me happier too! So when it's time, you'll know. Hadley (in my avatar picture) is the pig we got after Linney. I saw her and there was something about her that made me think of Linney in a fond way... there were several pigs to choose from, but I saw her and knew she was the one that would belong, and I'm glad she has a good home here, and I'm sure Linney would be glad too!
 

Freela

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thank you i appreciate that.
yes i cant believe how hard it has hit me. burying him was so tough. i cant bring myself to empty his cage.
just wondering how long it took you guys to feel a bit more 'normal' after going through this? i know its only been a couple of days for me, but it feels like its going to take a long time :(
x
It's hard to say... I used to do grief counseling, and used to tell clients that grief is like a roller coaster... it has ups and downs. Linney passed just over 2 months ago. It's easier than it was at first. It does help that I still have Sundae (Linney's 'little sister' pig) and have acquired Hadley (Sundae's new buddy.) But there are times when something will trigger me and I miss her so much more acutely. I'll see a pig that looks like her in a pet shop, or I'll see an old picture on my phone or on facebook and it will hurt. I find it tends to spill over when I'm upset about other things. But there are other times when I'm okay, or when I think of her but don't feel sad, but am rather thinking of good times with her. I know there are going to be times when I will miss her acutely still coming up... my parents have a cottage and Linney loved it there because she could go outside and eat the clover. I know the first time I go there without her, I'll wish she was there and be upset. I'll always miss her. But the times that hurt are shorter when they come, and further in between, and I can now see pictures and remember her without always being sad. It will come. Hang in there!
 

mickey2090

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I work from home as well, so I know what you're saying! I 'see' my pigs more than any of the people in my family, simply because the people leave to go out to work and school and the pigs and I are home. They are in the same room as my 'office' and I interact with them a lot throughout the day, so I definitely get attached and they become a fixture in my life and it's SO hard to lose that.

As for when/whether to get another one... I think when it's time, you'll know. In my case, I've always been left with half a pair who would be happier with a friend, so I often got a companion for the remaining pig before I felt ready to get one emotionally. It would take me awhile to warm up to them... but eventually I would love them just as much. They're not a replacement- the animals we've loved and lost can never be replaced. Individuals are not replaceable. But you build a new relationship with a new pig who you will love in their own way, for the unique individual that they are. There's a poem I really like called A Dog's Last Will and Testament (you can apply it to any pet, though it's written for dogs. It's very easy to find online.) The jist of it is that if an animal could write a will, they would leave their home and their belongings and the love of their family to another animal in need, because what animals have to pass on is the love they leave behind. It always makes me cry, but it really speaks to me... they leave so much love behind. The best thing I can do in their memory is to pay it forward to an animal who needs a home. And it will make me happier too! So when it's time, you'll know. Hadley (in my avatar picture) is the pig we got after Linney. I saw her and there was something about her that made me think of Linney in a fond way... there were several pigs to choose from, but I saw her and knew she was the one that would belong, and I'm glad she has a good home here, and I'm sure Linney would be glad too!
thanks for your kind words. means a lot. ye it has hit me incredibly. barely sleeping, no interest in doing anything/eating etc....... I'm really struggling.
yes i think you are right, i will probably decide in a few weeks/months or as you say, when it feels right.
just read that. wow that got me going!
i do love them. if i had the room id have about 10! special animals......

nearly ten years together.man it hurts. people laugh at this, and i dont care. but i felt closer to him than i ever have done a person. gonna be so tough to get over.
x
 
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