My poor Emma ☹️

Claire W

Claire W

Forum Donator 2025/26
Joined
Mar 23, 2008
Messages
38,096
Reaction score
31,200
Points
2,915
Location
Lancashire (Originally from Nottingham)
It was this time last year that Emma was diagnosed with a cancerous tumour. As she was already nearly 6 years old at the time, I made the decision not to operate and to let her live the rest of her life in peace.

Many of you will remember that she sadly died in January after I stupidly fell down the stairs and landed on her whilst she was free roaming :( Her 6th gotcha day is coming up and I can’t help but think she could still have been here now if it wasn’t for me :(
 
I’m so sorry that you’re having a hard time with these feelings, there truly seems to be no way to feel happy on such occasions after a beloved piggy has passed. Try not to blame yourself, doing so will only cause you more pain and diminish the fact that you gave her an amazing long life full of joy. Regardless of how she passed, that one moment does not override all the years of love and happiness you had with her. I hope you can find some peace on her special day xx
 
I know you still feel bad about what happened to Emma. It is only natural to feel this way it is also part of the grieving process. You gave her a life full of love and happiness and she wouldn't like it if she knew you were still feeling that it was your fault. You fell down the stairs these things happen. I did it myself in January and I am still suffering now as my back plays up sometimes. You mustn't blame yourself for a freak accident. I think you mentioned that you have spoken to a pet bereavement line did they help you come to terms with what happened and you aren't to blame yourself?
 
Thank you both. Yes I did speak to the blue cross pet bereavement service @Betsy It helped at the time but now all the old feelings of guilt are coming back now these anniversaries are arriving. I’m dreading her gotcha day arriving next week :(
 
Claire W said:
Thank you both. Yes I did speak to the blue cross pet bereavement service @Betsy It helped at the time but now all the old feelings of guilt are coming back now these anniversaries are arriving. I’m dreading her gotcha day arriving next week :(
Click to expand...
That is understandable. Maybe you need to speak again to the Pet Bereavement people as you are getting the old feeling of guilt back? @Claire W
 
I'm so sorry that you are still struggling to cope with the loss of Emma. Anxiety can sometimes cause those guilty feelings,it shows how much you cared and loved Emma. when i think of a passing of a piggie,i use this as a celebration of life of the passed away piggie.i make veggie cakes for all my piggies to eat.Please take your time,and be kind to yourself .xx
 
You obviously are a very dedicated mum to your babies and most definitely to your little Emma. I can say the same as anyone and they couldn't be more true but I know it can't change a very difficult and emotional day for you.

Besides the forum, if you have a nearby friend or family member that you could visit and talk to as the day is nearing and on that day, maybe that can really help you.

Thinking very much of you and your little one. I hope you are feeling well physically as well.

Right here on the forum are really the best people you can have as support as well at any moment you need.
 
Maybe it would help to plan something meaningful for yourself and your piggies that day in memory of her? Buy or make them a small toy that Emma would have loved, or try out a new treat recipe with some of her favourite veggies, to let her know you’re thinking of her.
 
Charlpigs said:
Maybe it would help to plan something meaningful for yourself and your piggies that day in memory of her? Buy or make them a small toy that Emma would have loved, or try out a new treat recipe with some of her favourite veggies, to let her know you’re thinking of her.
Click to expand...
Loving that idea! Good one @Charlpigs! Now why didn't I think of that?:doh:
 
Oh Claire hugest of hugs to you. What happened was a complete freak of an accident. I wish there was something I could say that would bring you comfort
 
Please don't blame yourself Claire, it was an unavoidable accident and Emma knew that you loved her more than anything in the world. She lived a long, happy and loved life. :hug::hug::hug:
 
Hello Claire.
Emma was a reason I stayed on this forum. Her and you're battles are openly fought on here.
I joined nearly a year ago as my world was hurt aftet a great buddy died Pedro my sad date is 25th May.
We all grief and deeper levels. I can't even do his rainbow tribute without it hurting and i delet it.
I've met you your mother and was honoured to meet powerful Emma. She was wonderful and sad how she died my heart feels for you. Nothing I can say will bring them back and i can tell you their time with us made us.
Be Strong lass and i will also.
Dave. x
 
Oh Clair, I can imagine how difficult this must be for you, but rest assured no one could have given Emma a better life than you.
You set the bar high when it comes to dedicated and experienced owners, and I sometimes wonder if a tragic and unavoidable accident possibly saved her from lingering and suffering later on?

If possible why don't you set aside that day (or part of it) to remember and celebrate Emma.
And allow yourself to grieve too.
I have several special animal anniversaries that I still 'celebrate', and I spend the time looking at photos, going for a walk in their favorite place, and crying so hard I almost can't breathe. It's ok to be sad sometimes too.
Do something to celebrate the wonderful and amazing life that Emma had with you. Her passing is simply a brief moment in a much longer and very beautiful journey.
 
Anniversaries are hard when we’re grieving, especially when it’s a first anniversary.
@Charlpigs idea for marking the day is a very good idea.
The other forum members have all given great advice and support.
That support will help you through the difficult days.
Nothing hurries grief - it takes time and that is all part of the healing.
Keep telling yourself that you forgive yourself. At some point you will realise that you mean it and you will accept that Emma’s death was an accident.
 
Swissgreys said:
Oh Clair, I can imagine how difficult this must be for you, but rest assured no one could have given Emma a better life than you.
You set the bar high when it comes to dedicated and experienced owners, and I sometimes wonder if a tragic and unavoidable accident possibly saved her from lingering and suffering later on?

If possible why don't you set aside that day (or part of it) to remember and celebrate Emma.
And allow yourself to grieve too.
I have several special animal anniversaries that I still 'celebrate', and I spend the time looking at photos, going for a walk in their favorite place, and crying so hard I almost can't breathe. It's ok to be sad sometimes too.
Do something to celebrate the wonderful and amazing life that Emma had with you. Her passing is simply a brief moment in a much longer and very beautiful journey.
Click to expand...
I agree with what you say about the accident preventing her from suffering, I couldn’t figure out a way to word it without sounding insensitive but I think you said it perfectly. Cancer is awful and can cause so much suffering; perhaps in some way it could be seen as a blessing that lovely Emma was saved from that fate
 
Please don't blame yourself for this horrible accident :hug:

I'm afraid birthdays (and gotcha days) can make the memories come flooding back :(
 
Oh Claire, huge hugs to you. It’s bittersweet remembering these beautiful creatures on significant days but remember the good times, the love you shared and the connection you had rather than the terrible accident that was in no way whatsoever your fault. Xx
 
Claire W said:
Thank you for your kind words everyone.
I’m dreadin her gotcha day but will do something nice in memory of her and light a candle.

I just miss her so much and can’t stop thinking that maybe she would have still been here xx
Click to expand...
:hug:
 
Claire W said:
Thank you for your kind words everyone.
I’m dreadin her gotcha day but will do something nice in memory of her and light a candle.

I just miss her so much and can’t stop thinking that maybe she would have still been here xx
Click to expand...
Feeling as you do and others who including myself think "what if" around the circumstances when our loved animal dies . . .is a reminder of how much we loved them and miss them. xx
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top