Struggling with multiple losses

Burns360

Burns360

Junior Guinea Pig
Joined
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East Midlands, UK
I’ve lost 4 of my precious piggy’s this year all within a few months and it’s honestly shattered me.

My sweet girl rolo crossed the bridge aged 6
My sweet peanut crossed aged 7
My sweet cinnamon aged 5 1/2
And my sweet brownie aged 5 1/2

It’s really broken me, I feel I can’t talk about how sad I am and how much of a gap they have left in my life, especially peanut, she made me fall in love with piggy’s, I moved 2 hours away from my family to be with my partner in 2016 and 3 days later I got peanut, she has been with with me from the start of my new life, the ups and downs, helped me so much with my anxiety, as did the others. It’s been a few months since rolo, peanut and cinnamon passed, and a few weeks since brownie has passed. I’ve got rolo and peanuts ashes by my bedside and cinnamon and brownie are buried in pots next to each other. As both pairs lived together.

Sorry if this post seems ridiculous I guess I’m just struggling a little
 
I'm so very sorry to hear of your losses. You are not making a ridiculous post, and there are an awful lot of us on here that can relate. Many of us have lost lots of our piggies in quick succession. My boars were all similar age, so I lost quite a few over the last year.

We can all fully sympathise here, and we are more than happy to offer support.

I do hope you start to feel better soon. Do take comfort in just how loved your piggies were, and that they lived to fantastic ages (thanks to your care).

Sending love
 
You are not making a ridiculous post, I am at the beginning of my piggy journey and at less than a year In already can't imagine life without them. For something so small they can leave a big hole in your life. I can only imagine the loss you are feeling. Be proud that you gave them a loving home and great life.❤
 
BIG HUGS

I am very sorry. Multiple losses are extremely hard to bear.

I have also lost 4 piggies this year between January and August; one of them was only 3 years old (cancer).

However, I am still recovering from losing a staggering 22 piggies in the two years between 15th August 2021 and 15th August 2023; that has been nearly a piggy per month on average - only that it happened more in lumps with me losing 2-3 piggies in just a week about 5 times; a year ago just before Christmas two of them only a day apart in the wake of the first extreme cold spell (even though they are all indoors piggies) and I contracted Long Covid about halfway through, which hasn't helped. :(

I only had around 27 piggies at any time during this but I also have to mention that I have been extremely blessed that I didn't lose any piggies at all in the first 18 months of the pandemic but have then made up a with a vengeance since. The spell mirrors my biggest adoption spree the years around 2017. But it has been simply horrendous. I did go into grieving indigestion (i.e. I lost the ability to process) for about half a year between October and April this year, only to unexpectedly having to pts young Tegeirian in May... Occasionally the undigested bits come up in a hard lump; especially with a any new loss. This is also what you are currently experiencing. :(

Since my own piggy history goes back over half a centiry to my childhood piggies, I have had enough about small pets not being worth grieving for. But it is never about the species but about the quality of the bond. Those who say these things have never had pets themselves or they would understand how deeply we love - and how deeply we grieve for that precious love.

Be kind to yourself and give yourself time to work through it all; you cannot hurry on that process. Make sure that you do not get stuck in negative mind loops like feelings of guilt or being a bad owner. We humans are wired to reflect everything back onto ourselves, including coincidences and things we do not have any control over. We can only ever give our piggies a good and fulfilled life; we cannot choose when, what from and in what circumstances they pass - that is out of our control. Thankfully, piggies don't have a concept for an average life span; they measure their life in happy todays. As long as you have given them plenty of those, you have not failed them in any way and you are ahead, as far as they are concerned. :)

You may find the grieving guide I have written helpful. It contains a chapter on what we can positively do to help the grieving process on. You may also want to consider contacting one of the free Blue Cross (UK charity) pet bereavement platforms in order to talk it out of you; talking is the best thing you can do. Pet bereavement is now recognised as a mental health issue that can affect anybody and there is thankfully more trained help around these days.

Here are the links you may find helpful in making more sense of your strong and often unexpected emotions and thoughts:
Wiebke's Home Support Care Guides - Contents list and subforum link
Pet bereavement and pet loss

Please trust that it will get better again eventually. Grieving is also not just all bad. It is a time when our roots grow deeper and stronger in the process of coping with our pain. It makes us more understanding and empathetic towards the suffering of others and ultimately it makes us stronger when we come out at the other end. We still keep all those precious little memories and the richness our pets have brought into our lives is part of what makes us as persons; they will never be totally gone, unless you choose so. Grieving is the other side of love, but the love will endure. :tu:

I hope that this will help you.
 
I’m so sorry that you’ve had such a tough time with multiple losses in a short space of time. You loved and cared for them dearly so it’s only natural that you will grieve their loss. They were your furry family and lived to great ages. Grief is never easy to deal with but you’re in a safe space here as we all understand and empathise with you. Be gentle with yourself x
 
So sorry for your losses You are not by any means being ridiculous. We here understand how devastating the loss of our piggies can be especially around the holidays.
They aren't just a pet , they are family. May they all rest in peace , and our thoughts are with you.
 
I am so sorry to read your post and send you hugs at this sad time. You are not ridiculous at all, we have all had to say goodbye to much loved pets and it is never easy. You gave them a long life full of love and they would have known that. The ashes of4 of my piggies are in my bedroom with me and it gives me comfort. Take care of yourself as you grieve.
Rest in peace little ones 🌈
 
Sorry for your losses. I lost 2 boys within 3 months of each other and it was difficult. There is lots of support here as we all understand how precious our pets are to us and how much we love them. My thoughts are with you at this difficult time x
 
So sorry that you have lost 4 of your beloved piggies so close together.
They have all reached good ages which is a real tribute to your love and care.
Be gentle with yourself as you grieve.
Holding you in my heart ❤️
 
I know exactly how you feel. I've just lost 2 pigs within 5 weeks of each other, and it is brutal. I also lost a Cinnamon, and he to me was like your Peanut was to you. He was also 7, and he totally changed me, made me love guinea pigs and set me on the course of becoming vegan. The vast majority of people don't understand: when you say you've lost a guinea pig people treat it as though you had a bad day at work, so it's easy to feel alone.

Your pigs all lived to a good age though, and I'm sure they had amazing lives, so just keep telling yourself how lucky they were to have ended up with you. The end is never pretty and never goes the way you want, but it's about the life you gave them that's important.
 
Your post's not ridiculous. We lost our two girls last year, one in January and the other in October, and there are still times when it hits me hard. We've lost little beings who were important to us, who we loved and who loved us. It takes time, something I'm still learning. But your heart will heal and you'll be able to think of them without hurting so much.
 
((HUGS)), I'm so sorry! It doesn't sound ridiculous at all. Pets are part of the family and we acutely feel these losses... it's especially hard when losses seem to stack on top of each other with no real time to grieve and process them. We've got two pigs and also hamsters... we lost one ham a few days before Christmas, have another ham who is palliative because she has a tumor, and have another who is elderly and being treated for an infection. It is ROUGH dealing with so much illness and death in a short time, and there are days when I basically just have a good cry because it's a lot to take all at once. And, like you, I feel like sometimes no one understands the pain involved with losing pets, especially a pet that isn't the typical dog or cat. But rest assured that everyone here gets it and we've all been there. Gentle ((HUGS)) to you and again, I'm so sorry.
 
I'm so sorry for your great loss 💜
Its not ridiculous at all to feel sad. Guinea pigs are adorable, funny and loveable little monsters. Ofc you miss them!
 
Wiebke said:
BIG HUGS

I am very sorry. Multiple losses are extremely hard to bear.

I have also lost 4 piggies this year between January and August; one of them was only 3 years old (cancer).

However, I am still recovering from losing a staggering 22 piggies in the two years between 15th August 2021 and 15th August 2023; that has been nearly a piggy per month on average - only that it happened more in lumps with me losing 2-3 piggies in just a week about 5 times; a year ago just before Christmas two of them only a day apart in the wake of the first extreme cold spell (even though they are all indoors piggies) and I contracted Long Covid about halfway through, which hasn't helped. :(

I only had around 27 piggies at any time during this but I also have to mention that I have been extremely blessed that I didn't lose any piggies at all in the first 18 months of the pandemic but have then made up a with a vengeance since. The spell mirrors my biggest adoption spree the years around 2017. But it has been simply horrendous. I did go into grieving indigestion (i.e. I lost the ability to process) for about half a year between October and April this year, only to unexpectedly having to pts young Tegeirian in May... Occasionally the undigested bits come up in a hard lump; especially with a any new loss. This is also what you are currently experiencing. :(

Since my own piggy history goes back over half a centiry to my childhood piggies, I have had enough about small pets not being worth grieving for. But it is never about the species but about the quality of the bond. Those who say these things have never had pets themselves or they would understand how deeply we love - and how deeply we grieve for that precious love.

Be kind to yourself and give yourself time to work through it all; you cannot hurry on that process. Make sure that you do not get stuck in negative mind loops like feelings of guilt or being a bad owner. We humans are wired to reflect everything back onto ourselves, including coincidences and things we do not have any control over. We can only ever give our piggies a good and fulfilled life; we cannot choose when, what from and in what circumstances they pass - that is out of our control. Thankfully, piggies don't have a concept for an average life span; they measure their life in happy todays. As long as you have given them plenty of those, you have not failed them in any way and you are ahead, as far as they are concerned. :)

You may find the grieving guide I have written helpful. It contains a chapter on what we can positively do to help the grieving process on. You may also want to consider contacting one of the free Blue Cross (UK charity) pet bereavement platforms in order to talk it out of you; talking is the best thing you can do. Pet bereavement is now recognised as a mental health issue that can affect anybody and there is thankfully more trained help around these days.

Here are the links you may find helpful in making more sense of your strong and often unexpected emotions and thoughts:
Wiebke's Home Support Care Guides - Contents list and subforum link
Pet bereavement and pet loss

Please trust that it will get better again eventually. Grieving is also not just all bad. It is a time when our roots grow deeper and stronger in the process of coping with our pain. It makes us more understanding and empathetic towards the suffering of others and ultimately it makes us stronger when we come out at the other end. We still keep all those precious little memories and the richness our pets have brought into our lives is part of what makes us as persons; they will never be totally gone, unless you choose so. Grieving is the other side of love, but the love will endure. :tu:

I hope that this will help you.
Click to expand...
I am so very sorry for all of your losses. These precious babies really embed themselves into our hearts and souls. I had some very hard losses this year as well. Haven't been able to bring myself to post about them yet. But, I will soon. To be honest, I love being around my piggy babies much more than people. I feel like animals are 'earth angels' sent from Heaven to teach us unconditional love as well as many other things, and that's why they get to leave this earth much sooner than we do.
 
Burns360 said:
I’ve lost 4 of my precious piggy’s this year all within a few months and it’s honestly shattered me.

My sweet girl rolo crossed the bridge aged 6
My sweet peanut crossed aged 7
My sweet cinnamon aged 5 1/2
And my sweet brownie aged 5 1/2

It’s really broken me, I feel I can’t talk about how sad I am and how much of a gap they have left in my life, especially peanut, she made me fall in love with piggy’s, I moved 2 hours away from my family to be with my partner in 2016 and 3 days later I got peanut, she has been with with me from the start of my new life, the ups and downs, helped me so much with my anxiety, as did the others. It’s been a few months since rolo, peanut and cinnamon passed, and a few weeks since brownie has passed. I’ve got rolo and peanuts ashes by my bedside and cinnamon and brownie are buried in pots next to each other. As both pairs lived together.

Sorry if this post seems ridiculous I guess I’m just struggling a little
Click to expand...
I am so sorry for all of your losses. It's so hard losing these sweet beings. Please don't apologize for sharing your feelings and this post is absolutely not ridiculous! Take your time to grieve. I just lost two of my babies that I was most bonded with (one a couple of weeks ago and one in August). They were Sisters and very outgoing, friendly and very loving to me, from the beginning. I will be sharing a post soon, but haven't been able to bring myself to that point yet. I love all of my babies and have mourned all of my losses and they all held a special place in my heart, but, Misha (pictured in my avatar, I lost in 2018 at a little over two years old), Sparrow (I lost in August of 2023 at almost 6 and a half) and Hazel (I lost Jan 12th of this year at 6 and a half) were very bonded with me and all loved my attention and gave me their attention; gave cuddles and kisses- just loved being with me and I them. They meant the world to me and my life feels less without them in it. With all of this, please let yourself grieve and be gentle with yourself. These wonderful beings really leave a whole in our hearts when they leave this earth
 
Sending you so much love while you navigate your grief… You obviously have such a huge heart, which is exactly why you are the most wonderful caregiver to your piggies. I love this forum and the support I have gotten from it. I hope you feel so very wrapped in love at this time. You are not alone in your grief ❤️
 
I’m so sorry. Losing piggos is never easy and it’s completely valid to be having a hard time with the loss. I also have/had piggos that are all around the same age. With that means they are all passing around the same time. It’s so difficult to deal with not only one but multiple losses. Hugs to you during this difficult time.
 
It's so hard when you lose piggies close together. I lost my Cutey Pie Dennis and his brother Silver Fox Christian within 3 days of each other. Dennis from a URI which he had been fighting for 3 months and Christian from a heart attack (I think). I was totally devasted for months. These piggies wheak their way into your heart. Take it gently as you grieve. The more you have loved the more you grieve and grief is love with nowhere to go.
 
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