ChibbiChan
New Born Pup
Hi this is my first post here and I am literally in tears writing this at work. As a biologically-born male who wishes to exude a calm, relaxed and emotionally-controlled demeanor, I find this extremely difficult to do right now. Holding back the tears brings more tears...and it is because I've recently lost my best friend, companion, and "baby" cavy named Chibi. He died on November 8th, 2020. I've read a few posts here and decided to join because what better way to honor him than to further memorialize this awesome, loving, emotionally-supportive - and often talkative - guinea pig. That and I need some way to express how I am feeling without "weirding" out my family, human-friends and coworkers.
What a ride it was with this little guy. He was quite a peculiar cavy as well. When I bought him, he was the tiniest guinea pig at a big-box store - alone in a corner, frozen in place while the other piggies were doing their normal piggy things. He immediately caught my attention because of how "out-of-place" he was. Thinking back, he might have been a newly introduced member to that temporary housing unit. I bought him with the original intent to have a semi-pet-ownership experience for my girlfriend, who was never allowed to own any pets growing up, who still doesn't own any pets of her own to this day. Of course, she's a person who does have a sense of wonder and love for animals, I felt at the time I could purchase a "simple" pet to keep at my place for us to enjoy when she's over. Never did I think that a "simple" (notice quotations) guinea pig would hold such a huge place in my life, mind and heart and would cause me so much emotional distress after his death. I have owned many pets growing up...but for some reason, this one is hands-down the most difficult to "get over". That alone is a testament to this amazing little guy and tells me that he was loved, whole-heartedly.
Chibi was my first guinea pig. I will admit...and I know everyone will hate me for it, I am sorry, but I need to let it out. He was a sole purchase, single guinea pig. Chibi, like me, was a one-man (or cavy) pack. I went in blind - didn't do any research about cavies...very reckless and irresponsible of a human when owning a new pet. I wanted to purchase a 2nd guinea pig for him, but was strongly encouraged against it...in previous attempts at introducing other cavies to Chibi, Chibi did not respond well (to say the least). He was a scrappy little , he was, let's just say. Because of failed attempts at socializing Chibi with other guinea pigs, we made the final decision to care for a lone cavy, but as compensation, he would need loads of time from us, attention and care. That was the caveat, and for the most part, I can honestly say that it went pretty well. He seemed OK for being a lone piggy, yes, I know I will summon some negative feelings for those who love piggies too and have more experience with them, but honestly, he was OK.
Chibi was my companion during gaming sessions, watching TV, doing chores around the apartment, and pretty much everything else I did at home. The pitter-patter of his footsteps ring loudly in my mind as I recall cooking dinner. My girlfriend and I aren't living together, so having this furry roommate made late nights and long days quite relaxing and pleasurable. He was always around. He slept beside my bed. Memories of him always climbing the sides of his cage to get my attention, telling me to take him out for no-cage-time, or give him some carrot, his favorite treat. I can see him scampering towards me when his name is called...that little trot mixed in with little guinea pig noises and "chuts" will be stained in my mind forever. He loved love. And this love he shared with me for 5 years is a love that I know I will not ever have again, even if I do decide to buy guinea pigS in the future (notice capital 'S'...it will be more than 1 next time), but that won't be for a while. The pain is too much right now to think about going through this again.
Memories of Chibi are replaying in my mind. He's pulling my heartstrings from the grave. Chibi was full of life, full of personality and was quite the blabber-mouth to those he was acquainted with...this boy loved to talk! And by talk, I mean...being my alarm clock with no snooze button, a breakfast, lunchtime, dinner and many snack times reminder-er, even a pseudo-psychiatrist for me. It was during a time in my life where I was, let's just say, feeling very alone. My circle included my girlfriend, my immediate family and Chibi. Growing up, I always had a pretty big group of friends, so this period of transition in my life was "different". Looking back, however, this wasn't so bad at all...all my needs are met by this very small and tight-knit group of loved ones, with Chibi being the one who I spent some of the most time with. He was my lap-buddy. Everyday companion. My duty to care for. My best friend. Now, though, out of tears of regret, shoulda-coulda-woulda's, loving memories and sad flashbacks to his last few days, it has causes a deep wound in my heart to realize that one (huge) piece of that puzzle is lost.
He fell ill and rapidly declined until one day, about 2 days ago, we spent our final night together. It pains me so much...I didn't bring him to a vet earlier, I should've noticed the signs more. I'm so deeply hurt right now, it's like a betrayed my best friend. The heaviness in my heart hasn't left since I found him without life. That last night together...I think about him climbing the sides of his cage, I know he isn't feeling well, but wants to be picked up. Such a tough and loving piggy. Maybe he was telling me something, a last goodbye, perhaps? Did he know he was going away for good? I carried him for the last time and he felt very, very light, like he hadn't eaten for the entire day. His water bottle was the same level as it was that morning when I left for work. I'm pretty sure he didn't eat anything that day, unfortunately, no one was able to keep him company during the day. I gave him Chibi kisses (nose to nose), kisses on the head, and hugs. I called a vet - this was at about 1:00 AM - and they opened at 7:00 AM for walk-in emergencies. I told him, before going to sleep, "We're going to the vet a little later, goodnight Chibi" and dozed off. When I woke up, literally the immediate moment my body and mind awoke, the very first thought in my mind was "CHIBI!"...I sprung up from bed, looked down on the floor where Chibi sleeps, and there he was...not in his igloo, but in the same exact spot he always is when I wake up...that certain spot on the foot of his cage. He was dead. Breathless. Cold. Still beautiful as the cute, good-looking guinea pig is, but gone from this plain of existence. I cried for the first time in a long time, I didn't even cry this much when my dog passed away, why am I so distraught right now? I kept thinking that, but thoughts of what his final moments must've been like run through my mind. Was he climbing the sides of his cage during his last moments, in an attempt to get my attention while I was asleep? Was he trying to tell me to take him to the vet now? Was he trying to say his final goodbye? I will never know. He's buried in my mother's garden and I'm planning to get some sort of fruit bearing plant to place over his grave.
I've been carrying this burden deep within me since his passing. Sorry if this is a very long post, maybe this may serve as a sort-of dairy about him. He will always be loved. I'm sorry I didn't take him to see a vet sooner, sorry that I am an ignorant owner who didn't notice the signs earlier. I'm sorry you had to die the way you did. The lessons of love, patience, kinship and what NOT to do with guinea pigs are lessons I will carry until my time comes to leave this plain of existence. He was a tough little guy. A noisy little guy. A scrappy little guy. A spoiled little guy. A loving little guy. I will love you forever little guy. Thank you for your years of life we were able to share together. Rest in love, my bestie. You will forever be missed.
What a ride it was with this little guy. He was quite a peculiar cavy as well. When I bought him, he was the tiniest guinea pig at a big-box store - alone in a corner, frozen in place while the other piggies were doing their normal piggy things. He immediately caught my attention because of how "out-of-place" he was. Thinking back, he might have been a newly introduced member to that temporary housing unit. I bought him with the original intent to have a semi-pet-ownership experience for my girlfriend, who was never allowed to own any pets growing up, who still doesn't own any pets of her own to this day. Of course, she's a person who does have a sense of wonder and love for animals, I felt at the time I could purchase a "simple" pet to keep at my place for us to enjoy when she's over. Never did I think that a "simple" (notice quotations) guinea pig would hold such a huge place in my life, mind and heart and would cause me so much emotional distress after his death. I have owned many pets growing up...but for some reason, this one is hands-down the most difficult to "get over". That alone is a testament to this amazing little guy and tells me that he was loved, whole-heartedly.
Chibi was my first guinea pig. I will admit...and I know everyone will hate me for it, I am sorry, but I need to let it out. He was a sole purchase, single guinea pig. Chibi, like me, was a one-man (or cavy) pack. I went in blind - didn't do any research about cavies...very reckless and irresponsible of a human when owning a new pet. I wanted to purchase a 2nd guinea pig for him, but was strongly encouraged against it...in previous attempts at introducing other cavies to Chibi, Chibi did not respond well (to say the least). He was a scrappy little , he was, let's just say. Because of failed attempts at socializing Chibi with other guinea pigs, we made the final decision to care for a lone cavy, but as compensation, he would need loads of time from us, attention and care. That was the caveat, and for the most part, I can honestly say that it went pretty well. He seemed OK for being a lone piggy, yes, I know I will summon some negative feelings for those who love piggies too and have more experience with them, but honestly, he was OK.
Chibi was my companion during gaming sessions, watching TV, doing chores around the apartment, and pretty much everything else I did at home. The pitter-patter of his footsteps ring loudly in my mind as I recall cooking dinner. My girlfriend and I aren't living together, so having this furry roommate made late nights and long days quite relaxing and pleasurable. He was always around. He slept beside my bed. Memories of him always climbing the sides of his cage to get my attention, telling me to take him out for no-cage-time, or give him some carrot, his favorite treat. I can see him scampering towards me when his name is called...that little trot mixed in with little guinea pig noises and "chuts" will be stained in my mind forever. He loved love. And this love he shared with me for 5 years is a love that I know I will not ever have again, even if I do decide to buy guinea pigS in the future (notice capital 'S'...it will be more than 1 next time), but that won't be for a while. The pain is too much right now to think about going through this again.
Memories of Chibi are replaying in my mind. He's pulling my heartstrings from the grave. Chibi was full of life, full of personality and was quite the blabber-mouth to those he was acquainted with...this boy loved to talk! And by talk, I mean...being my alarm clock with no snooze button, a breakfast, lunchtime, dinner and many snack times reminder-er, even a pseudo-psychiatrist for me. It was during a time in my life where I was, let's just say, feeling very alone. My circle included my girlfriend, my immediate family and Chibi. Growing up, I always had a pretty big group of friends, so this period of transition in my life was "different". Looking back, however, this wasn't so bad at all...all my needs are met by this very small and tight-knit group of loved ones, with Chibi being the one who I spent some of the most time with. He was my lap-buddy. Everyday companion. My duty to care for. My best friend. Now, though, out of tears of regret, shoulda-coulda-woulda's, loving memories and sad flashbacks to his last few days, it has causes a deep wound in my heart to realize that one (huge) piece of that puzzle is lost.
He fell ill and rapidly declined until one day, about 2 days ago, we spent our final night together. It pains me so much...I didn't bring him to a vet earlier, I should've noticed the signs more. I'm so deeply hurt right now, it's like a betrayed my best friend. The heaviness in my heart hasn't left since I found him without life. That last night together...I think about him climbing the sides of his cage, I know he isn't feeling well, but wants to be picked up. Such a tough and loving piggy. Maybe he was telling me something, a last goodbye, perhaps? Did he know he was going away for good? I carried him for the last time and he felt very, very light, like he hadn't eaten for the entire day. His water bottle was the same level as it was that morning when I left for work. I'm pretty sure he didn't eat anything that day, unfortunately, no one was able to keep him company during the day. I gave him Chibi kisses (nose to nose), kisses on the head, and hugs. I called a vet - this was at about 1:00 AM - and they opened at 7:00 AM for walk-in emergencies. I told him, before going to sleep, "We're going to the vet a little later, goodnight Chibi" and dozed off. When I woke up, literally the immediate moment my body and mind awoke, the very first thought in my mind was "CHIBI!"...I sprung up from bed, looked down on the floor where Chibi sleeps, and there he was...not in his igloo, but in the same exact spot he always is when I wake up...that certain spot on the foot of his cage. He was dead. Breathless. Cold. Still beautiful as the cute, good-looking guinea pig is, but gone from this plain of existence. I cried for the first time in a long time, I didn't even cry this much when my dog passed away, why am I so distraught right now? I kept thinking that, but thoughts of what his final moments must've been like run through my mind. Was he climbing the sides of his cage during his last moments, in an attempt to get my attention while I was asleep? Was he trying to tell me to take him to the vet now? Was he trying to say his final goodbye? I will never know. He's buried in my mother's garden and I'm planning to get some sort of fruit bearing plant to place over his grave.
I've been carrying this burden deep within me since his passing. Sorry if this is a very long post, maybe this may serve as a sort-of dairy about him. He will always be loved. I'm sorry I didn't take him to see a vet sooner, sorry that I am an ignorant owner who didn't notice the signs earlier. I'm sorry you had to die the way you did. The lessons of love, patience, kinship and what NOT to do with guinea pigs are lessons I will carry until my time comes to leave this plain of existence. He was a tough little guy. A noisy little guy. A scrappy little guy. A spoiled little guy. A loving little guy. I will love you forever little guy. Thank you for your years of life we were able to share together. Rest in love, my bestie. You will forever be missed.
