The garden I badly wanted but the timing just wasn't right

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My pap who passed away recentlies house has gone up for sale, it was offered to me or my brother, but because of the uncertainty of our jobs right now, and the price of the house being pretty high end for what We could afford, we both decided to leave it.

This is the garden I would have dreamt for my pigs to be grazing on in the summer times. Sad to see it go to someone else, but it's got to be done 👍View attachment 148833View attachment 148832
 
It would have been very emotional moving in to your paps house too, just imagine decorating and trying to make it your own. I think you have done the sensible thing and in time when things feel more secure you can find a home to make your own
 
Lady Kelly said:
It would have been very emotional moving in to your paps house too, just imagine decorating and trying to make it your own. I think you have done the sensible thing and in time when things feel more secure you can find a home to make your own
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Yea it would have been difficult, would have felt like I was clearing him out in a way. I think we are going to wait until we have a bigger deposit on a cheaper house, and then not have such big monthly payments. This house has gone up for 240,000 and I've seen better for 205,000. It's just the garden here is very long for the size of house.
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
Yea it would have been difficult, would have felt like I was clearing him out in a way. I think we are going to wait until we have a bigger deposit on a cheaper house, and then not have such big monthly payments. This house has gone up for 240,000 and I've seen better for 205,000. It's just the garden here is very long for the size of house.
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The housing market is going to be unstable. Stay put, squirrel as much away as possible and then look when everything's settled more. I would recommend working out how much you can afford to pay each month and work backwards adding in the deposit to work out how much you can afford to borrow. I hate seeing how much they would let us borrow, the monthly repayments would be extortionate and if we had the smallest change we would immediately struggle. Much better to feel comfortable with the monthly payments.
 
Ah it is a very difficult decision but you are right to be mindful of costs and ups and downs with employment,housing etc. You might have needed to modernise it etc. I’m sure you will find the right house and older houses always have bigger gardens. My brothers and sisters and I had to sell our Parents house (our childhood home); It needed a lot of work and also had a long garden. We watched the house improve and saw the young family living there enjoy it. That made us happy. It was the right decision for us and I’m sure it is the right decision for you and your brother. Look forward always ! As Lady Kelly says save to add to your deposit and you‘ll find that perfect house 😊
 
Lady Kelly said:
The housing market is going to be unstable. Stay put, squirrel as much away as possible and then look when everything's settled more. I would recommend working out how much you can afford to pay each month and work backwards adding in the deposit to work out how much you can afford to borrow. I hate seeing how much they would let us borrow, the monthly repayments would be extortionate and if we had the smallest change we would immediately struggle. Much better to feel comfortable with the monthly payments.
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Yea you are right, I think in a few years we will be resdy to look. I'm on the property ladder at the moment but only a 25% mortgage, I just feel like for my age I'm not doing too well, but then I shouldn't compare myself to other people. My pap left me a decent amount of money in a will, but it has to be given only so much a year because of tax. That's going straight towards a house. I don't want anything huge, just something with a garden and drive, snd and alright area.

The car is in for mot Thursday 😱 wish me luck
 
Roselina said:
Ah it is a very difficult decision but you are right to be mindful of costs and ups and downs with employment,housing etc. You might have needed to modernise it etc. I’m sure you will find the right house and older houses always have bigger gardens. My brothers and sisters and I had to sell our Parents house (our childhood home); It needed a lot of work and also had a long garden. We watched the house improve and saw the young family living there enjoy it. That made us happy. It was the right decision for us and I’m sure it is the right decision for you and your brother. Look forward always ! As Lady Kelly says save to add to your deposit and you‘ll find that perfect house 😊
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Yea, my paps house hadn't been decorated whilst he was living there since the early 90's, it has the owners befores wallpaper and carpet lol🤣. The house is 1950s built, yea hense the garden size
 
Here's the living room, iView attachment 148844 don't mind posting it even though its sort of personal. I like the serving hatch 🤔 the wife doesn't even have to come out of the kitchen..... Just kidding, might be a 1950s house but it's 2020🤣
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
Yea you are right, I think in a few years we will be resdy to look. I'm on the property ladder at the moment but only a 25% mortgage, I just feel like for my age I'm not doing too well, but then I shouldn't compare myself to other people. My pap left me a decent amount of money in a will, but it has to be given only so much a year because of tax. That's going straight towards a house. I don't want anything huge, just something with a garden and drive, snd and alright area.

The car is in for mot Thursday 😱 wish me luck
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Don't compare yourself to others. I worked as a specialist debt advisor for 8 years and the things I saw! Some people live lavish lifestyles but are still hand to mouth every month. I have seen people with take home pay each month that I could only dream of yet I was living comfortably. Mostly because of the job in all honesty, you see what it does to people and learn quickly to deal with your intuition as to whether something is affordable rather than listening to banks etc.

Try moneysavingexpert for advice. Savings accounts aren't great right now but definitely keep an eye on the best accounts and don't be scared to move savings around to earn the best interest rates. Every penny counts
 
Lady Kelly said:
Don't compare yourself to others. I worked as a specialist debt advisor for 8 years and the things I saw! Some people live lavish lifestyles but are still hand to mouth every month. I have seen people with take home pay each month that I could only dream of yet I was living comfortably. Mostly because of the job in all honesty, you see what it does to people and learn quickly to deal with your intuition as to whether something is affordable rather than listening to banks etc.

Try moneysavingexpert for advice. Savings accounts aren't great right now but definitely keep an eye on the best accounts and don't be scared to move savings around to earn the best interest rates. Every penny counts
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Yea, I know quite a few who live a champagne lifestyle on a lemonade budget, posh cars that they can't afford to service or replace broken parts. I've never had a thing on finance, everything I have I pay outright. ( not saying finance is bad for everyone).

Some people think affording something is to actual be able to posses it, but it's being able to and maintain it down the line. If I had of gone for the house above, I'd be worrying for years if an expensive bill comes up on the car, or if a big vet bill comes along.

The only thing good about buying a house right now, is that the stamp duty has stopped. But that's about it.

I couldn't live hand to mouth every month. It's what my brother does, I have to have a safety net . I'm not a risk taker
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
Here's the living room, iView attachment 148844 don't mind posting it even though its sort of personal. I like the serving hatch 🤔 the wife doesn't even have to come out of the kitchen..... Just kidding, might be a 1950s house but it's 2020🤣
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My 🤣 was for the comment about your wife not needing to come out of the kitchen ... the hatch is very 50s/60s. Don't think you'd ever find one in a new house now!

Wise words from @Lady Kelly . FWIW, I think you're very wise in not taking risks, especially at the moment. Negative equity is a horrible thing. Heaven knows what will happen with the housing market in the next year or two - round here, houses are coming on the market at prices similar to before Covid, but experts had said that economic problems caused by lockdown would be bad for the housing market.

I hope your dream for yourselves and your piggies comes true eventually! 🤞🌠🙏
 
Lady Kelly & Qualcast & Flymo are right ! Don’t compare yourself to others ! You’re special
This was displayed as the ‘ thought for the day ‘ at Elephant & Castle tube a few years ago
“ You are amazing ,unique and wonderful. There is nothing more you need to be ,do or have in order to be happy ....so smile . Give love and enjoy every moment of this precious life.”
I often re read when things are tough or I feel low or fed up. It works for me and puts it all in perspective.
 
Qualcast&Flymo said:
My 🤣 was for the comment about your wife not needing to come out of the kitchen ... the hatch is very 50s/60s. Don't think you'd ever find one in a new house now!

Wise words from @Lady Kelly . FWIW, I think you're very wise in not taking risks, especially at the moment. Negative equity is a horrible thing. Heaven knows what will happen with the housing market in the next year or two - round here, houses are coming on the market at prices similar to before Covid, but experts had said that economic problems caused by lockdown would be bad for the housing market.

I hope your dream for yourselves and your piggies comes true eventually! 🤞🌠🙏
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The market has been over-inflated for ages, it's as though no lessons were learnt from 2007-2008, there's so much capital investing in the long term returns on property that it'd take everything else out again - of course the market being inflated by foreign investors as a safe place isn't exactly helping, a 1930s council built semi should in theory be qualitivately worse than a private rebuild, but it's anything but - in theory the market should be allowed to crash and reach a natural level, but there's so much riding on it that policy continues to keep it on life support.
 
Roselina said:
Lady Kelly & Qualcast & Flymo are right ! Don’t compare yourself to others ! You’re special
This was displayed as the ‘ thought for the day ‘ at Elephant & Castle tube a few years ago
“ You are amazing ,unique and wonderful. There is nothing more you need to be ,do or have in order to be happy ....so smile . Give love and enjoy every moment of this precious life.”
I often re read when things are tough or I feel low or fed up. It works for me and puts it all in perspective.
Click to expand...

It's so true, it's why so many maxims are wrong - however hard you work, and however good a person you are, however intelligent you are, so-called 'success' is always a game of chance, when circumstance intervenes.
 
It's all a rat race, always told myself not to go too far into it, but it's happening lol😏

I try to stay out of it as much as possible

I'm not one for promotions, Flash belongings, designer clothes, wanting the latest product on adverts, but there's only so much you can do
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
It's all a rat race, always told myself not to go too far into it, but it's happening lol😏

I try to stay out of it as much as possible

I'm not one for promotions, Flash belongings, designer clothes, wanting the latest product on adverts, but there's only so much you can do
Click to expand...

Me neither, it's all a racket, it's economically nececarry, but on a logical level - why is it at all acceptable for a child in a poor country to earn a pittance and work in Victorian conditions to provide us with a product, i.e - clothing, which will be thrown away, for the sake of an invented need to maintain 'image', it's just logically ridiculous.
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
Yea, I know quite a few who live a champagne lifestyle on a lemonade budget, posh cars that they can't afford to service or replace broken parts. I've never had a thing on finance, everything I have I pay outright. ( not saying finance is bad for everyone).

Some people think affording something is to actual be able to posses it, but it's being able to and maintain it down the line. If I had of gone for the house above, I'd be worrying for years if an expensive bill comes up on the car, or if a big vet bill comes along.

The only thing good about buying a house right now, is that the stamp duty has stopped. But that's about it.

I couldn't live hand to mouth every month. It's what my brother does, I have to have a safety net . I'm not a risk taker
Click to expand...
Living within your means is always a good idea. That's what we have always done. When we were first married we had nothing. We only bought a bed and a washing machine and borrowed everything else. We were lucky to have a fiver left at the end of the month but we never went into the red. We paid our 25 year mortgage off in 20 years because we were careful with our money. All our friends were having flashy foreign holidays but we went away for a week towing my In-laws caravan behind the car and had a lovely time. You don't have to be splash the cash to be happy.
 
Falken said:
Me neither, it's all a racket, it's economically nececarry, but on a logical level - why is it at all acceptable for a child in a poor country to earn a pittance and work in Victorian conditions to provide us with a product, i.e - clothing, which will be thrown away, for the sake of an invented need to maintain 'image', it's just logically ridiculous.
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Ray race **
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
Here's the living room, iView attachment 148844 don't mind posting it even though its sort of personal. I like the serving hatch 🤔 the wife doesn't even have to come out of the kitchen..... Just kidding, might be a 1950s house but it's 2020🤣
Click to expand...
We still have a serving hatch in our bungalow which was built in the mid 80's... I love it and refuse to have it bricked up🤣🤣
 
Hello.
Would course been lovely and great for piggies . . But as you have explained and well thought the timing not right...
We are in a uncertain times.
This may help and hope it does. . @SkyPipDotBernie I live near my passed parents house and at first was sad but time allows us to reflect and we all need to move on and i see around me (large village) some who take on parents home after they died and others who don't (me) and on reflection better to break away.
You doing ok pal . . My Piggies send you :luv:
 
We moved into my in laws house after they had both passed away, my sil didn't want it so as we were looking to buy it worked for us, it was never where I wanted to live and still I don't feel like it's my home, just the house where we live but we are lucky because it's family, we are paying off lump sums as and when we can, so build up savings and pay a bit, luckily for us she is in no rush to have all the money in one go. Even with that we looked at a mortgage to do renovations/extension etc and the amount we could borrow was staggering and quite frankly terrifying, we would have been living hand to mouth or paying it off for the rest of our lives, and with two children that isn't an option or a good example to set, we are incredibly lucky to have what we do, but it's been worked for. I do believe that when the time is right things fall in to place, whilst I didn't want to live where we are I am grateful for it during these times, the surroundings are beautiful and we don't feel that we've been affected by lockdowns too much, so maybe it is where we are supposed to be.
 
It's not about comparing yourself to what others are doing. If you are happy and your bills are paid then who cares whether you've got this or that. Life is for living and we can't take stuff with us. I'm all for enjoying and cherishing what I have and if the time comes for more then it will come. We bought our house 8 years ago, our first ever mortgage and it's the home we plan to stay in for life. I am a firm believer that you will know when something is right and this house obviously wasn't the right one at the right time. :)
 
Aw, fab garden, sorry the time was not quite write for you. Sometimes things are meant for a reason so don’t feel too disappointed. It can be difficult moving into a loved ones home and making big changes, I have a friend who moved into her mother’s home when she died and she found it extremely hard to clear and make improvements, she said it felt disrespectful in a way
 
As you may remember, we moved into my MIL's house in October. The difference was that we had my MIL's blessing as she is still around. My late FIL didn't want the house pulled down (which it would have been) so in a way we feel we have his blessing too. We have made some changes but thankfully my lovely MIL is OK with that. She says that she doesn't live here anymore and we are to do what we think is right to make it our home. It did feel a bit strange to begin with but we are OK with it now.
 
SkyPipDotBernie said:
My pap who passed away recentlies house has gone up for sale, it was offered to me or my brother, but because of the uncertainty of our jobs right now, and the price of the house being pretty high end for what We could afford, we both decided to leave it.

This is the garden I would have dreamt for my pigs to be grazing on in the summer times. Sad to see it go to someone else, but it's got to be done 👍View attachment 148833View attachment 148832
Click to expand...
So sorry to hear about your pap. My dad was known to me as pappy so your endearing name for your dad struck a cord with me. My brother and I were in the same situation neither of us in a position to buy our parents home. Try not to be sad there’s love in your heart for pap and your piggies. That’s the most important and beautiful thing.
 
:agr:you shouldn't go comparing yourself with others. My philosophy is as long as you like yourself, what you do and what you are who cares what anyone else thinks? I used to worry about what everyone else thought about me and tried to be who they wanted me to be but in the end I thought I'm not that person I'm me and I'm going to stay true to myself. I like myself, have 3 adult sons who are happy, confident and successful and I have been very happily married for over 30 years.
 
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