Guinea pig passed suddenly and feeling guilty

[Kidge]

Hi. Sorry that my first post in this forum is a sad one. I adopted 2 guinea pigs in April 2021 who were around 2 years old. Their previous owners had lost interest and were allergic so I was glad to give them a new home, especially as the previous owners said that others who had shown interest in adopting them didn’t seem like they had good intentions.

Today I had to have one of them (Frieda) put to sleep. I feel so guilty because I had noticed some mushy poops the other day and some lethargy but she has had these symptoms before. Last time I gave her critical care and took her to the vet who said she was in perfect health. Therefore as it was the Christmas break, the vet was closed and she was her usual self that afternoon I just monitored her. I also put it down to her being fed a bit later than normal during when she would usually have her nap.

She seemed her usual self yesterday (eating hay, drinking, screaming for veg and running around the cage) and her poos were back to their usual shape, but when I checked on her this morning she could barely move. Raced her to the vet who instantly put her to sleep. I’m in shock, can’t stop crying and feel so guilty I didn’t get her to an emergency vet. I’m wondering if it was bloat and by ignoring the warning signs it’s my fault what happened to her. I’m also now doubting my ability to take care of the remaining one. Has anyone else been through a similar thing? I think I just need to talk with people who have also lost piggies.

 

[Merab]

So sorry for your loss.
It sounds as if you acted well in taking her to the vet immediately.
Guinea pigs do hide illness well and often by the time we notice anything it’s too late.
Asking the ‘what if’ questions is a normal part of grief.
All you are feeling is perfectly normal and the rawness will ease.
Your surviving piggy will be fine for a while, just keep an eye on her.
Give yourself some space before worrying about anything else.
We do understand the pain of loss. These little animals have a gift for worming their way into our hearts and taking a firm hold.
Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself time to grieve.
You may find some of the information and advice on the Bereavement thread helps.
We are here to support you.

 

[Viennese Furbabies]

I'm really sorry! Sometimes piggies get sick real quickly and often the best vets can't do anything about it, if it just comes out of the blue.
I'm sure it wasn't your fault in any way or that you could have done anything that would have changed the outcome.
So please don't blame yourself!

 

[Kidge]

Thanks for your responses and advice. A part of me feels silly for being so upset considering I only was her owner a few months but I really loved her. She used to give me kisses and snuggle into my neck when I held her.

 

[Merab]

Thanks for your responses and advice. A part of me feels silly for being so upset considering I only was her owner a few months but I really loved her. She used to give me kisses and snuggle into my neck when I held her.

Don’t feel silly at all.
A piggy can create a home in your heart within seconds.
I was completely smitten by Merab, my avatar piggy, from the moment I set eyes on her.

 

[Kidge]

Don’t feel silly at all.
A piggy can create a home in your heart within seconds.
I was completely smitten by Merab, my avatar piggy, from the moment I set eyes on her.

I’m not surprised she’s gorgeous.

 

[Two_Wheeks]

I am so sorry for your loss. We can have these piggies in our lives for days, months, or years, their impact is the same.

Frieda will have known you had done all you can for her. They can go downhill in a matter of hours, so please don't blame yourself. The guilt, though normal, will pass. Remember the snuggles and the love, and know that you gave her a great life with you.

Take time for yourself and grieve as you need to.

Popcorn free little Frieda

 

[Wiebke]

Hi and welcome

HUGS

Intense feelings of guilt/failure/soul searching are very normal for the onset of the grieving process; but they are usually a lot stronger after a sudden death. They are not caused by the fact that you have done anything wrong or missed a vital clue (you haven't) but by the fact that we humans are wired to seek the fault always with ourselves, first and foremost. All they are is an expression of your love and great sense of responsibility for those in your care. You wouldn't suffer as badly if you didn't care and love so much in the first place.

Please be kind to yourself in the coming days while come to terms with what has happened.

Below is some very helpful and practical information on what you can expect as you go through your grieving process, where to get help if you need to; what you can do for any piggy companions and - if needed - get some answers about the dying process that may put your experiences into a bit more of a context. When you took your girl to the vet today, she was actually already in the latter stages of the dying process; when a piggy is rather frail with an underlying problem, it can happen very fast. What your vet did was simply sparing her the sharp end of it.
Here is the link: Death, Dying, Terminal Illness; Human Grieving and Bereaved Companions: Information and Support for Owners and Their Children

If you feel you would like to look around for a vet with more experience in guinea pigs (although some issues are not easy to diagnose), we do have a list of recommended vets on the top bar: Recommended Guinea Pig Vets

 

[Kidge]

Hi and welcome

HUGS

Intense feelings of guilt/failure/soul searching are very normal for the onset of the grieving process; but they are usually a lot stronger after a sudden death. They are not caused by the fact that you have done anything wrong or missed a vital clue (you haven't) but by the fact that we humans are wired to seek the fault always with ourselves, first and foremost. All they are is an expression of your love and great sense of responsibility for those in your care. You wouldn't suffer as badly if you didn't care and love so much in the first place.

Please be kind to yourself in the coming days while come to terms with what has happened.

Below is some very helpful and practical information on what you can expect as you go through your grieving process, where to get help if you need to; what you can do for any piggy companions and - if needed - get some answers about the dying process that may put your experiences into a bit more of a context. When you took your girl to the vet today, she was actually already in the latter stages of the dying process; when a piggy is rather frail with an underlying problem, it can happen very fast. What your vet did was simply sparing her the sharp end of it.
Here is the link: Death, Dying, Terminal Illness; Human Grieving and Bereaved Companions: Information and Support for Owners and Their Children

If you feel you would like to look around for a vet with more experience in guinea pigs (although some issues are not easy to diagnose), we do have a list of recommended vets on the top bar: Recommended Guinea Pig Vets

Thanks. I will look at both those sites. I did a lot of researching vets when I first got them and the one they ended up with had good reviews from other guinea pig owners. Don’t blame them at all and they’ve been very caring and helpful today. Just blame myself.

 

[Wiebke]

Thanks. I will look at both those sites. I did a lot of researching vets when I first got them and the one they ended up with had good reviews from other guinea pig owners. Don’t blame them at all and they’ve been very caring and helpful today. Just blame myself.

Please read the first link. You may find it very helpful in being able to put your own experiences and feelings in a bit more of a perspective and understand better what is going on. Especially if it is your first encounter with death, a lot of it will take you by surprise. It is not by any means what you'd expect!

 

[Kidge]

Please read the first link. You may find it very helpful in being able to put your own experiences and feelings in a bit more of a perspective and understand better what is going on. Especially if it is your first encounter with death, a lot of it will take you by surprise. It is not by any means what you'd expect!

Thanks I’m just reading it now and it is helping. I have gone through pet death before but this feels different. My previous ones were when I was living at home as a child and they passed away during the night so I never witnessed it. It was upsetting but I didn’t feel guilt. It might be because she was a rescue and I really wanted to give her a good life after what she had been through.

 

[Viennese Furbabies]

I'm sure you gave her a good life and she felt loved and protected.
You just don't have control over how long they live. You can only do your best for them and cherish every day.

 

[Wiebke]

Thanks I’m just reading it now and it is helping. I have gone through pet death before but this feels different. My previous ones were when I was living at home as a child and they passed away during the night so I never witnessed it. It was upsetting but I didn’t feel guilt. It might be because she was a rescue and I really wanted to give her a good life after what she had been through.

You have given her love, warmth and safety; all she could wish for. What is out of your control is a long life.

Try to take consolation in that guinea pigs don't have a concept for a set life span; they measure their lives in happy todays - and you have certainly given those to her; so you have not failed her at all. Only your own human expectations. It is always the quality over quantity that counts with our pets; we should enjoy them the way the enjoy the life we give them: by treasuring and measuring it by its happy moments.

 

[Bill & Ted]

I’m so sorry you had to say goodbye to Frieda, sending hugs. Please don’t blame yourself, you are a caring owner and guinea pigs are notorious for hiding serious illnesses until it is too late. Her mild tummy symptoms would not be cause for alarm in any of us
Sleep tight beautiful girl

 

[dhill_cb7]

I’m beyond sorry you had to deal with loss at an early stage of your bonding process with Frieda.

Please know you cannot blame yourself. In life there will always be what ifs and I wish I had a do-over. I personally wish I didn’t operate a vehicle under the influence and nearly kill myself and others but I’m sober and won’t ever do that again.

You gave her a wonderful home, beautifil life, and more than little Frieda could ever ask.

Please take care of yourself and know your remaining little one needs you too. Maybe when you grieve you can look to get a neutered boar or another female for you remaining girly.

Godspeed and, as a community, we are all here for you.

 

[Flutterby]

I'm so sorry for your loss xx

 

[Kidge]

Thanks everyone.