If your guinea pig could talk...

[Seven7]

FINN:
Could you kiss me once more through the bars Lara? One kiss just isn't enough Lara.
Can I get veggies four times a day instead of just three times a day?
Did you run out of parsley or cilantro? I like having at least two herbs with romaine lettuce for breakfast and dinner.

LARA:
It is called nose rub and not a kiss Finn. I wasn't kissing you at all so get it straight. Nose rub once a day is plenty enough for me.
Anyways, why is there just one kind of herb for breakfast and dinner. I am used to getting two or more herbs along with romaine lettuce.

 

[piglette]

Love this thread. Some input from my crazy lot:

DON'T touch my butt. DON'T trim my hairs. DON't cut my nails. Worst hooman ever.
OOH clean fleece. OOH new hidey. OOH fresh hay. Best hooman ever.
Why am I in a bowl on top of a scale? Again. Dis hooman weird.
OOH chin rub. OOH shoulder massage. OOH strokes on nose. OK that's enough hooman.
Neighbour pig! Come any closer and I will fight you! OK, let's eat parsley.
It's a strange noise! We all gonna die! Run piggies! OOH wait, is dat parsley?
Floor time? FREEDOM! OK tired now. Put me back.
Just three types of hay? Not good enough. Deprived and starving.
ExcUUUse me. I think I'm almost hungry. Feed me hooman. Hooman? HOOMAN!

 

[Patterjack&Piggles]

these are great...
Sage: Mamapig! Oi! Mamapig! I want food, and I want it now! Parsley! Get lost! I'm boss pig! *rumblestrut, teethchatter*
Parsley: Oh! Sage! I've decide I want to be boss pig, so while you are thinking of food, I'm going to take over the world! Argh! Mamapig! Run for you lives!
Juniper: Ooh! Hello Mamapig! Those two are arguing again, so you can just leave their share with me, and I will look after it for them... Also, while you are here, some worshipping wouldn't go amiss...
Flora (the Patterjack): Oh no! My piggie children are arguing! Oh I do not like this... Ooh! Is that dried mango you're thinking of giving them Mum?! Oh look how I say please and try to blend in with the piggies, so I need some too!

 

[Sonnet]

Sprout: Where’s the food? Where is it? No, I don’t want cuddles...okay, maybe a chin rub is fine. Stop calling me fat! What’s that noise...I’ll shout at it! FOOD!

Spud: No cuddles. No nail trims. Having fresh hay is fun...I’ll popcorn! Zoomies are good. Food?

 

[FarmGirl]

I love these! I'm going to have a think and add my herd in later on

 

[FarmGirl]

Okay, here we go :-)

Pearl: Fresh hay, fresh hay, I love fresh hay...check no one's looking, run, jump in, snuggle down aaannnndddd relax!

Bubbles: In the basket again, waiting as usually...excuse me human I'd like to go inside now where the food is, dont get her, pick me up next...no, okay then I'll jump and get out myself...no, got you to pick me next though, didn't it?!...now you're going too slow let me go, I'll just jump from here...no, okay then but get made you go faster though didn't it- get me in there with the food sharpish please!

Squeaky: Squeak its breakfast time, squeak the human is picking me up, squeak I'm going in the basket, squeak the human's putting me out for grass time, squeak please could we have some grass, squeak what do you mean I can graze myself, squeak time for a nap, squeak no I don't want my nails trimmed, squeak what do you mean I need brushing, squeak time for dinner, squeak I love hay, squeak night all!

Jasper: Ladies, ladies the human's coming with breakfast, quick, have you all got space at a bowl, ok I'll just eat here, no you want this spot instead ok I'll go over with Pearl. Ladies, ladies shall we have a nap, have you all got a comfy spot, ok I'll lie here, no you want this spot instead ok I'll go over with Pearl. Ladies, ladies we're out for grass time, have you all got a nice patch to graze, ok I'll have this area, no you want this spot instead ok I'll go over with Pearl.

Holly: Hello human, I'd like some breakfast now...thank you dear. Hello human have you come to take us for grass time...here I come, let me just step right over and now pick me up that's it, let's go. Hello human I'd like to go to bed now, please could you close up the shutters, thank you dear...night then, dont forget breakfast bright and early!