1_winged_angel
Junior Guinea Pig
Since losing Alphonse, I keep having this feeling of intense sadness and guilt. I keep asking myself if I did enough to help him and wondering whether or not this was my fault. I know it probably wasn't my fault and the fact that his illness was caused by someone else. But I still sit here less than 3 days later and I keep asking myself, "Did I do enough?" "Was this my fault?" "Did he carry on crying for me, even after I'd left the room?" "Does he know I love him so very much?"
I kept telling him I was so sorry. He was such an amazing little thing and he didn't deserve any of this, yet the person whose fault it is that he got sick is in his 50's and does nothing with his life... unless you call sleeping all day and leaving your home to resemble a slum an achievement. He gets to live on. Alphonse was little more than a teenager.
How do I work through feelings like that?
I kept telling him I was so sorry. He was such an amazing little thing and he didn't deserve any of this, yet the person whose fault it is that he got sick is in his 50's and does nothing with his life... unless you call sleeping all day and leaving your home to resemble a slum an achievement. He gets to live on. Alphonse was little more than a teenager.
How do I work through feelings like that?